Beauvoir has this passage in The Second Sex:
"The great fortune of men is that, whether as adults or as children, they must embark on an extremely difficult road, but it is a reliable one; the misfortune of women lies in being surrounded by almost irresistible temptations. She was not asked to work hard, only encouraged to slide toward pleasure; by the time she found a mirage in front of her, it was too late, her strength had been exhausted. ”
When we talk about the trajectory of men and women's lives, the path of life, there is always a variety of arguments.
For example: income, love and marriage.
Every time these topics are discussed, it is bound to cause a difference in perception between boys and girls.
I saw a girl's blind date post on the Internet.
Girls earn 3K a month, college degree, just graduated to work; small city life, is the only daughter of the family.
Her criteria for her partner are: the monthly salary can not be less than 10,000, there is a car and a house without loans, there is no brother or brother in the family, and the parents must have stable jobs.
This post below, caused a confrontation between men and women:
Some boys said: "Your own monthly salary is 3k, why do you ask the other party for 10,000?" ”
"How many apartments do you have in your house, and how much money do you have?"
And the girl's response is also more extreme: "Boys with a monthly salary of 10,000 are nothing."
From "Puxin male" to "Puxin female", in fact, there is a hidden opposition between the concept of marriage and love between men and women.
What is "Universal Faith"?
It can be understood as:
A person is very ordinary, but also confused with self-confidence.
Both boys and girls can use this word to describe it.
For example, a person with average looks, average stature, average income, and average family conditions; however, he feels good about himself, has extremely high requirements for his partner, and is very exaggerated.
At this time, we can call it "Puxin".
A person is so ordinary, but so confident.
-01
What kind of girl can be called "Puxin Girl"?
Puxin is not an ordinary person full of self-confidence.
Rather, it is an ordinary person who is self-righteous and feels good about himself; because of his "excessive narcissism", he has brought trouble to others.
This reminds me of the blind date of the "Tsinghua boy Zhang Kunwei".
When she first published her blind date request online, Zhang Kunwei was still teaching in a small city in her hometown, earning only 3K yuan a month.
There is no doubt that the marriage failed.
On the second blind date, Zhang Kunwei wrote in the blind date post that he earned a monthly salary of 50,000 yuan and had only one requirement for girls, that is, he was willing to develop near his hometown.
Unexpectedly, this time Zhang Kunwei received more "ridicule and depreciation".
Many girls said of him: "Even Puxin male is not counted, can only be mentally poor."
This was an eye-opener for ordinary people like me.
If a person with a poor spirit earns 50,000 yuan a month, then ordinary people like me must not be called "spiritual wasters".
Characteristics of Puxin Woman 1:
Belittling others through verbal ridicule and "spiritual offense" to others.
And Zhang Kunwei's blind date is just a microcosm of countless boys.
On the Internet, you can see the ridicule of "Puxin women" everywhere.
His monthly salary is several thousand, but he can't see that the boy earns 10,000 a month.
In some "neighborhoods", some girls even said bluntly: I hope that my future partner will earn millions of dollars a year, and I will have a car and a house.
Characteristic two: I have average conditions, but I feel good about myself
In the marriage market, the most important thing for people is to find their own positioning.
You know, marriage and love are not "field horse racing".
In the story of the Tianji horse racing, the inferior horse against the superior horse loses;
Medium horse vs. inferior horse, win;
The superior horse against the medium horse, won.
This is the strategy and choice.
In the marriage market, there are some girls with poor conditions who fantasize about changing their fate through marriage.
In fact, marriage pays attention to the door to the door, you have nothing, the value is not high, why ask high-value people to choose you?
-02
One can be imperfect, but one should not be filled with prejudice
"Judging people by their appearance" and "arbitrarily evaluating others" are all "prejudices".
It is a manifestation of being rude and disrespectful to others.
Stereotypes should not exist in the interaction between men and women.
For girls:
You have your view of marriage and love, and you have your own ideas, but they shouldn't be based on mocking boys.
What kind of marriage you want, you can find and pursue; but it must be in line with your own conditions.
A person can not be good enough, can not be so good-looking, the conditions can not be so good; but if he is kind, gentle, confident and optimistic, he will be liked by everyone.
On the contrary, even if a person is excellent.
But if others are of poor character, unkind, and disrespectful to others, then he will also become the "target of everyone".
When we talk about the contradictions caused by the difference between marriage and love between men and women, in fact, behind it is the problem of "class antagonism and uneven distribution of resources".
Let's take an analogy:
For people with high value and good conditions, they will not consider this kind of problem at all, and they will not be bothered by the conditions of the other party, and they have a lot of choice opportunities.
Only for ordinary people, there are choices, contradictions and differences.
When will the people at the bottom hurt each other?
You and I are just a drop in the ocean in this world, more tolerance, more kindness, more relief.
Less narrow-minded, less extreme, less sarcastic.
Whether it is a puxin man or a puxin woman, it is essentially a disapproval of the class in which they live, but they are powerless to change.
Today's Topic:
What do you think of "popular men and women"?
(Article with picture source network)