1, accompany the wife downstairs to eat KFC. Check out for $98. I touched my pajama pockets and didn't bring any money. The waiter said: "Your wife is here, you can't run, go home and get it!" "I sped to the fifth floor

1, accompany the wife downstairs to eat KFC. Check out for $98. I touched my pajama pockets and didn't bring any money. The waiter said: "Your wife is here, you can't run, go home and get it!" "I rushed to the fifth floor and took 100 pieces and rushed back. Just when I was exhausted and breathless, the waiter greeted me and said, "Hello! A total of 108 yuan. I looked at the big red ticket in my hand and the milk tea in my wife's hand, instantly petrified. How much you love milk tea, wife! This will not drink or die....

2, the husband introduced the beautiful cousin to the boss, and the boss promoted him to the manager as soon as he was happy. Since his promotion, my husband often goes out to socialize, and he didn't come back at 12 o'clock last night. I was watching TV in the living room, and my mother-in-law came out of the kitchen after cleaning the dishes and said to me: "You two have been married for three years, why can't you conceive a child?" Is there something wrong with you? I was not pleased, and said with grievance: "Mom, how can you say this, you should ask your son if there is a problem, I am not pregnant!" ”?

3. When I was about to leave work last night, I planned to take my wife to eat well. At this time, the manager walked in and said to everyone: Everyone has worked hard today, so I want to surprise you before leaving work. Everyone: What surprises? Manager: In order to complete the task ahead of schedule, the comrades fought for another 3 hours, and I helped call a box lunch.

4. Tonight, I was cooking in the kitchen, and my son said to me: Mom, this is my pocket money, I have been saving it, I want to buy my father a pair of shoes. Curiously, I asked: Is the sun coming out of the west? What do you want to buy for it? The son said: Anything can be done, as long as the sole is soft. Me: Why is the sole soft? Son: My test results are coming soon. I:......

5. I had a boyfriend at Tsinghua, and when I first met, I greeted me warmly. Later, I got acquainted, whether I was injured or had a hard time, he would come to say: "Drink more hot water" And then I got pregnant, as long as I was a little windy, he would immediately ask me: "How?" Do you want to go to the hospital? Then the smooth delivery, it was different, I: "I have a fever, my head hurts." He: "Oh! Me: "I measured, 39.5°C!" He chuckled, "Wow, that's great! ”

6, nephew especially like dogs, sister is afraid that nephew is allergic to dog hair is unwilling, not long brother-in-law picked up a dog without hair on the road! The neighbor of the sister's house opposite the door has only Tibetan mastiffs, which is aggressive! Yesterday, my brother-in-law and nephew were walking around the park with their dogs, and they saw Yuju leading a Tibetan mastiff over! The Tibetan mastiff broke free of the rope and rushed straight to the hairless dog, and The Tibetan Mastiff saw it and shouted, "Don't..." Before he could finish speaking, the Tibetan mastiff fell to the ground! Yu ju asked, "What kind of dog is this!" The brother-in-law said, "I don't know, I picked it up on the road!" The uncle who played tai chi next to him replied: "Before plucking the hair, people called it a lion." ”

7. Yesterday and Xiaopo had dinner together. Xiao Po sighed with a depressed face and said, "I figured it out, men have nothing else, honesty is the most important." In my lifetime, I hope to find an honest person to marry. I was very surprised to hear it and said, "You can think like this, so which honest person do you like?" Then she took out her phone and pointed it at a male star and said excitedly: "He looks very honest!" ”?

8. On this day, the class teacher had a birthday, and our classmates bought a cake to celebrate with the class fee. Put out the candles, put out the birthday song, then turn off the lights and light the candles, so that the class teacher can make a wish. After making their wishes, everyone asked what they had made, and they giggled and laughed. The class teacher said: My biggest wish is that I hope you will study hard and turn in your homework on time... At this time, a classmate said: Teacher, the wish will not work..."

9. Working for a media company, we have a very annoying colleague in our department. Because he never speaks through the brain and often offends people. Recently, the head of our department bought a new Volkswagen Passat and said that after work, we would like to have a meal together. As a result, the colleague came to the sentence: Buy a car to celebrate what? Celebrating yourself with one more way to die? Then this colleague lost his job!

10. The old man and Aunt Wang downstairs fell in love. One day, the old man called aunt Li and called our family to dinner together. The old man personally cooked and made a large table of good dishes. During the meal, Aunt Li tasted a dish and then asked the old man: Honey, what kind of meat is this? The old man said: Rabbit meat! Aunt Li burst into tears and said: Rabbit is so cute! How can you... How can it be... It's so hard to eat!

11. My girlfriend is my son's class teacher, and I complained to me yesterday that my son was in love. My husband angrily picked up the feather duster and was about to fight, I couldn't pull it, then the girlfriend said again: "The girl's mother is called Wu Xiaoli!" The husband was stunned, and then silently stroked his son's head! I asked my husband what was going on, and he said, "Heavenly reincarnation, my son finally gave me a blood for the shame of twenty years ago..."

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #