Xiaoming's face was swollen and the classmate asked the reason, Xiaoming said: "Yesterday I went to the park to row a boat, and a bee fell on my face. The classmate asked, "Wouldn't it be okay to drive him away?" Bob: "It didn't take time, me."

Xiaoming's face was swollen and the classmate asked the reason, Xiaoming said: "Yesterday I went to the park to row a boat, and a bee fell on my face. The classmate asked, "Wouldn't it be okay to drive him away?" Xiaoming: "Before I could do it, my father beat him to death with a paddle." ”

2, this afternoon, I was bored at home, so I used a cotton swab to pluck my ear while watching a TV series, but I accidentally broke half of it in my ear, and I couldn't take it out. I carefully clipped it out with forceps, and as a result, I scratched the skin again. I drew two tissues to wipe the blood, and then I cried sadly. I thought I could find someone who would pour out my heart and lungs for me, but I didn't even have anyone who was willing to dig my ears for me!

3, take off the thick coat, the sleeves are pulled up, or simply short-sleeved shorts together to "go to battle". While others had already wrapped themselves tightly against the cold, hundreds of students at Jinjiang College at Sichuan University "ignited" the winter with summer-like enthusiasm.

4, when I was in junior high school, I was still very slim, 170 tall, good face, many boys in the class silently liked me. Even the recognized male god in the class came to me one day and handed me an ice cream in an almost commanding tone: "For you, hold it!" Then, shyly and quickly ran away! The weather was hot, the ice cream was sweet, and the sweetness and coolness went straight into my heart. This domineering president's love, unexpectedly, opened the tightly closed atrium of my girl's heart. I whispered silently inwardly, until the male god hurried over again: Hey, ice cream, didn't I go to the toilet to let you help get it?

5. Every weekend, urging children to write homework is a vicious battle. Today, my son lay on the ground and said to his father: "Reading is the most useless, I have been reading for six years, and I have not earned a penny." If I had spent the past six years as a beggar, I don't know how much I've made. Dad angrily shouted at him, "You go, go now!" The son whispered, "You have to think about this, the paper in front of me will not be very auspicious, at least five words will be written: abandoned by parents ..."

6, many times to see, double eleven is very easy to make people impulsive consumption of the "trap", and many of your life "trap", some people will only jump in, and then complain, some people can use it to make their lives better, the difference is here, of course, not participating is also a way to avoid being deceived.

7, I am a freshman, yesterday the bedroom stopped the water, the toilet piled up a day's excrement, last night only came to the water, found the toilet blocked, so with a stick to dredge, half a day did not see the effect, a roommate volunteered, forcefully poked into the toilet hole, after a while the dirt is gone, but from the toilet hole out of the light, everyone is curious to go up to see, found that the toilet hole was pierced by this brother, the following one is crouching large, looking up at us, the eyes are full of hatred.

8, just now the daughter-in-law wanted to cut me in a fierce way, asked me what I did wrong. As soon as I saw that my daughter-in-law had come to be real, I had to confess, wiped my feet with your towel, secretly used your toothpaste and facial cleanser, and stole your mask. My daughter-in-law glanced at me and said it wasn't either, something else. I had to grit my teeth to contact my recent girlfriend with my first love, and I also shook it out. The result was not right, and finally forced myself to install a few wrong things, and my daughter-in-law told me satisfactorily that I wanted to cut you today because you wore one of your socks backwards! Oops! I'll go.

9, this weekend is the fifth anniversary of my marriage with my husband, just in time for my husband to pay his salary, ready to take me to a dashing. He took me to a star-rated hotel. Me: Are you really going to eat here? The prices at this restaurant are frighteningly expensive. Husband: How expensive is it? Me: It's so expensive that you want to pack up the unfinished water and take it home. Husband: So is it too late to change homes? I

10, bought a new Maybach to go to his girlfriend's house to pick her up and go shopping with her, and her mother also went with her. The girlfriend took a little longer to wear makeup, and her mother waited next to her for a while, and suddenly said while smoking her face: It's really useless, it's really useless. The girlfriend looked at her mother doubtfully and said: Mom, what is wrong with you? Her mother continued to say: Mother is really useless, if she had the ability to make you beautiful, it would be necessary for you to work so hard to make up. Girlfriend: Mom, are you in a hurry and you say you can't do it?

1 classmate saw the beautiful girl flying a kite in the park, decisively bought a kite to fly, and after a while the two kites successfully wrapped together and hung in the treetops in many circles... Beauty is very angry, the classmate lost kite money with WeChat pay to get her WeChat signal, the two people chatted hot... Now the classmates have successfully been brought into the C-pin by her, and the old miserable...

12, this is a dock restaurant, built by the water, the eaves of the shop roof protruding, there are tables and chairs outside the store, xu is to facilitate the customers on the ship to eat. The Cold Food Festival is over, and everyone is on fire to cook. The owner is using a long pole to adjust the position of the color forging, and these color forgings add some lively atmosphere to the shop.

13. A woman in a car was clipped off the index finger of her right hand, and sued the car company for 2 million yuan. The lawyer said: "One finger is afraid that I can't claim so much?" The woman growled, "That finger of mine is used to direct my husband!!! ”

14, I was about to go to the toilet because of my stomach discomfort, but the landlady called me to the office and asked slowly and logically: "Test you, what can I fill this room at once?" I said, "Light a candle and fill it with candlelight." The landlady said, "It's daytime, and I don't have candles." I said, "With my love for the company, fill it with my love." The landlady said, "Less of these empty heads." "There's no way, I just farted...