Just came a foodie patient, weight loss can not be reduced, feel anxious and uneasy, I said: "You can find some hobbies, disperse the spiritual dependence on food, don't always think about eating, there are many things."

Just came a foodie patient, weight loss can not be reduced, feel anxious and uneasy, I said: "You can find some hobbies, disperse the spiritual dependence on food, don't always think about eating, there are many things you can do, life must be happy." She nodded and blurted out, "Don't make the spoon empty to the bowl." ”

2, one day, I was walking on the street with a friend, and suddenly, I stepped on a banana peel and fell on my back. My friend hurriedly picked me up and said to me very seriously, "My mood now can be described by the name of a drink." "What?" I said, and my friend burst out laughing and said, "Cool crooked." ”

3, go to the buffet at noon, 40 yuan a person. The sister-in-law can eat, and after eating, the boss asked her for 80 yuan. Isn't that a blackmail! The sister-in-law called the police at that time. The police came, and after understanding the situation, they asked the sister-in-law: "Girl, how long have you not eaten?" Sister-in-law: "Of course I eat every day!" Policeman: "Girl, it's not me saying you, you eat the buffet, eat 2 pounds of lobster, 3 pounds of abalone, 10 pieces of steak, a case of beer, a bottle of 82 years of Lafite red wine, you want to eat people bankrupt ah!"

4, the daughter-in-law's aunt came, sexually aroused, so let her help me L. Slightly uncomfortable, let her tap, the daughter-in-law said, the slave family is originally a rough person, can not do your fine work! Live! Live! I'm going to have a happy life in the future!

5, because my brother looks too ugly, my father had to go to the hospital to do the identification, the result was completed, everyone laughed all night. Because when I went to the hospital for an appraisal, the doctor saw that my father had taken my brother and asked, "Are you planning to do a paternity test?" Dad said to the doctor, "Of course! As a result, the doctor left his father speechless with a single word. The doctor said, "It should be biological, you two look like a mold!"

6, today my son actually skipped class to go online, after returning at night, I directly picked up the slippers and shouted: "Stinky boy looking for death, you can't hide from beating you today." "My son was so frightened that he hid from me all over the house, and then sneaked out of the house as fast as he could. He had just run out for two minutes, when suddenly it started hail, and I thought to myself, "Damn, pour you hard!" Then the son came back wet, and he wrapped his head and said, "Daddy, don't hit me, I've been knocked unconscious by this hail." ”

7, the old watch through the telephone pole on the heavy gold to ask for children advertising, and a rich woman to get along. However, the good times were not long, and after the two had been dating for a while, the woman's family knew about it, and the family found the old watch to talk to him and asked him not to pestering her in the future. I looked at the old watch all day and sighed, and exhorted: Forget it, it is not your own, don't force it, we can't climb the !!! The old watch took a sip of his cigarette fiercely, looked up at the sky at a 45-degree angle and said slowly: How is this different from what people say, how did you not say that you gave me a breakup fee of 1 million............

8, today I took the subway, found that I did sit in the wrong direction, had to go to the next station to change. An old man got out of the car with me and followed me to the opposite direction. In the car, he said to me: "Young man, pay attention in the future, don't sit in the wrong direction." ”

9, my husband took the child to my grandmother's house, and I went out for the first time in a year without a child. Pack yourself up and suddenly don't know where to go? It's hard to know where to go, but I don't know what a person can go to eat, and there is a spell to eat?

10, in the evening with friends to go to the barbecue stall to drink, then there is a small couple next door, the woman said: order a roast hot dog, to shape the shape, the boy nodded shyly. At that moment, my friend and I had a tacit understanding that we had never had since we knew each other, he poured out the roasted enoki mushrooms, and I shouted loudly: Boss, grill two eggplants, bigger.

1 A while ago, the cousin went on a blind date and did not look at the blind date, but he looked at the girl who went with the object. After that, he frantically pursued the girl, and finally won it after twists and turns. At the wedding banquet, the object of the previous blind date also came, and the cousin said to her with some embarrassment: Thank you for still coming to bless me, at first only blamed us for having no luck. The girl said quietly: Originally it was your daughter-in-law who was on a blind date, and she had to let me play ugly and disgusting you...

12, the cousin took a taxi to a Maybach, the old man who drove the car was very able to talk, educating the cousin: the most important thing for people is to be happy. The cousin asked the old man curiously: Have you always been so happy? The old man said that in fact, he was very depressed before, and the doctor said that there was no way to let him read chicken soup for the soul. Cousin asked: Does it work? The old man said that he would use it as a fart, and then asked him to read the Buddhist scriptures and copy the scriptures. Cousin asked: Does it work? The old man said to use the fart, and the cousin looked at the old man incomprehensibly. He laughed: It was later demolished! Got 5 houses!

13, Baoji has a child has been in the fourth grade, suddenly obsessed with the game, every day to play games, parents really have no way. I hid the mobile phone, but the bear child can still find it by rummaging through the boxes and cabinets. Now the primary school students are really too powerful, actually said that they can't get into college without playing games, Bill Gates was born to play games, and later became the richest man. If you don't let you play games, even the school is reluctant to go. There are many students like Baoji, and the game is so attractive to children, but there is no way to stop it

14, today I actually met my ex-boyfriend riding an electric car with his new girlfriend, and after getting out of the car, the two people held hands and entered the supermarket. When they walked away, I found that his electric car was not locked... alas! He was still as careless as ever, what if the car was stolen? So I bought a lock nearby and locked it for him.