1, the wife went abroad, the family left me and my mother-in-law two people, my mother-in-law is 48 years old this year, the long charm still exists, because my father-in-law left early, so my mother-in-law has been single, my father-in-law

1, the wife went abroad, the family left me and my mother-in-law two people, my mother-in-law is 48 years old this year, the long charm still exists, because my father-in-law left early, so my mother-in-law has been single, my mother-in-law in a company as a financial director, the ability is very outstanding, the income is also very high, so there are many bachelors want to pursue my mother-in-law. But because my wife was not happy that her mother would find a stepfather for herself, she has always opposed her mother's remarriage. This time my wife went abroad, and many bachelors felt that there was an opportunity, and they all flocked to my house to propose to my mother-in-law. My mother-in-law was embarrassed to face such a scene, so she asked my son-in-law to come forward for her. In the end, I secretly operated, selected the chairman of our company, and let him and my mother-in-law come together. Our chairman promised me that when he retired, the whole company would be taken care of by me. I'm so witty!

2, after the morning after the window son is thirsty, I went to pour him water: you see, this cup is hot water, that cup is cold water, can not drink. Pour two glasses of water together to neutralize them, turn them into warm water and drink them. Before going to bed at night, I complained: Now this weather, the thick quilt is a little hot, and the thin quilt is a little cold... The son immediately said: I know! That night, I covered the thick quilt and the thin quilt so that it was just right to neutralize it!

3. Yesterday I went to a noodle restaurant to eat noodles, and a beautiful waitress came over and asked, "What noodles do you want to eat?" I wanted to tease her, so I said, "Small bowl of noodles, big bowl, more slices of meat and less ginger, thin lala no soup!" The girl looked at me stunned for a moment, turned her head and shouted into the kitchen, "Dad, someone has come to smash the field!" "I..."

4, two days ago to see the brother's family's erha is very good-looking and want one. At home on the weekend, I said to my mother: Mom, I want to buy a two-ha puppy, as long as 800 yuan. Mom directly refused: No, it's too expensive!! I tried to convince her that the golden retriever was particularly cute and could pull out to woo her when she was raised. Mom instantly changed her face: buy, directly buy adult big dog!!

5. Just changed into a white wedding dress at the photography base, a bear child next to him smeared his oily hand on the skirt. The bear child's parents saw the situation and said, "He is still a child and does not understand things." "I pushed the child down in a hurry, and the bear child cried at that time, and his mother was immediately anxious. I retracted directly into my husband's arms, and my husband said, "He's still a child, he doesn't understand things!" ”

6, in Futukang work, today all our staff to carry out a physical examination together, a colleague in the ECG, the colleague is very scared to lie on the window, the doctor said: "Don't move, don't be nervous, just pretend to die." The colleague nodded after listening, and lay flat without moving. After a while, the colleague gasped and said, "Doctor, I really can't hold back." ”"

7. Tutoring my son to do math problems on weekends, encountering a problem and doing it several times without success. The son looked contemptuous and silently did it himself... After a while, the son shouted: Mom, I succeeded! Mom: Why didn't I succeed a few times? Son: Because you are my mother. Mom: Stinky boy, what do you mean? Son: Don't we all say that "failure is the mother of success"?

8. After eating at noon today, the wife asked her husband to help her wash the dishes, and the husband immediately agreed, and then the husband secretly called the nine-year-old son who was playing to him and gently said to him: "Child, now you will start practicing washing dishes, and you will definitely be able to help your wife in the future." The son said with a look of disgust: "No, in the future I can ask my son to wash the dishes." ”

9. The young man asked the Zen master: Master, I have endless money to spend every day, but I do not feel so-called happiness because of this money, please point it out. The Zen master asked, "Well, Naxi tell me where you are rich." The youth replied: I am also a small garbage, only eight figures of savings, how many houses in Beijing? The Zen master did not speak, only held out a hand, and the young man suddenly realized: Zen master let me know how to be grateful and reciprocal? Zen Master: No, the local tycoon... We.. Can I be friends?

10, the flight attendant successfully picked up a rich man on the plane. Since then, he has lived the life of a rich man, often taking the money of the local tycoons to buy some luxury goods. That time out of the shopping, the flight attendant directly brushed the three million bank cards of the local tycoons. After returning home, the local tycoon angrily scolded her: "My pocket money for a whole month was actually brushed up by you in one day, let's break up, I can't afford to raise you, I love to find who to find." The flight attendant said grievously: "I love you to spend your money, others send me, I am not rare." The local tycoon was immediately moved, and immediately took the flight attendant into his arms!

11, in the square, someone on the ground to practice calligraphy, the wife found it interesting, looked at it for a while, then said to the husband: or you also practice calligraphy on the ground, not only do not cost anything, but also exercise, self-cultivation. Unexpectedly, the husband thought about it and said depressedly: If you think I am lazy, you just say it, don't you just want me to mop the floor at home often! Wife:..... If you think so, you have to practice even more!

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