1, in the public toilet door to see a brother, with the public hand sanitizer and cold tap water to wash hair, and then combing in the mirror full of stains, I was a little moved: "Wash your hair in this kind of place."

1, in the public toilet door to see a little brother, with the public hand sanitizer and cold tap water to wash hair, and then comb in the mirror full of stains, I was a little moved: "Wash your hair in this kind of place, you must be going to meet some important people, right?" He shook the water from his hair and said, "See a fart, I fell asleep when I was squatting in the pit just now."

2, at home has always been the mother cooking. Suddenly, one day, Dad had a whim and watched the online video to get four dishes. I secretly resolved that no matter what the taste, I would eat everything, and I must encourage and support my father. However, just as I was reaching for a crab, the crab suddenly took the initiative to clamp my chopsticks...

3, eat at the mother's place, the daughter-in-law ate almost, began to comment on the dish plate: this plate is good, the porcelain embryo color is white, the pattern is also bright, compared to that, it is much worse, the color is yellow, it is definitely cheaper than this. Mom couldn't help but give a thumbs up: You're right! The good one is six dollars, the other one is five dollars nine.

4, just bought lv bag belt broken, I went to find a master, for 50 yuan. I put the bag in the master's place and left, and then I thought that although this bag was LV's, it was a bit worthless to repair it. Decided not to want the bag, and then did not go to get it again... Half a year later, I passed by the shop that repaired the bag and saw that the bag was sold by the master, asking for 50! Because the price is too cheap, everyone thinks it is not true, and no one has bought it.

5, after being abandoned by the rich woman who lost her freshness, she got a 50 million breakup fee, so she immediately went to the Ferrari 4S store to order a 488. Today, the sales girl of the 4S store called me and said: "Your customized 488 has arrived, you can come over and pay for the car." I said, "After waiting a whole year, I like the rolls-Royce now, don't want it." Sister: "If this is the case, your deposit cannot be refunded." I said, "You know, you take it and spend it, I'm not short of this money." The next day my sister came to my company, threw 80,000 yuan in my face, and roared: "Hurry up and buy me a car!" How you talk doesn't count! ”

6. After dinner, the mother and daughter wash the dishes together, and the father and son watch TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a knock of plates breaking in the kitchen, and then there was silence! The son looked at his father and said, "It must have been broken by my mother!" Dad asked strangely, "How do you know?" The son replied, "Because she didn't swear." ”

7, a new female colleague of the company has a sore throat! I gave her a bottle of throat stoppers. When her throat was better, she asked me, "How good was the medicine you gave me last time?" "Eat for a while," I said, "it must work!" Invaluable. She said, "Is it so expensive?" I teased her and said, "Of course it costs you how much?" I'm afraid I'm going to have to say your words so you can have a promise!" She said sharply. How many hundreds? ”

8. When I was studying at Harvard University, I met several foreign buddies. Once, a foreign buddy suddenly asked me, "Are you really kung fu?" Isn't it a flower rack for practice? I said, "It must be true, internal force, dark weapons or whatever, the deepest one in kung fu is called the point hole, even our elementary school students here will." This brother looked in disbelief, and I immediately showed him: rubbing the Tianying Acupoint, squeezing the Eye Ming Acupoint, rubbing the four white acupoints, scraping the eye sockets according to the temple chakra... After this foreign brother read it, he had to worship me as a teacher...

9, the cousin bought 18 million lottery tickets, planning to buy a villa. The daughter-in-law had to follow her to see the house, saying that it was for the staff officer. At the sales office, the sales lady said: As long as you pay a deposit of 100,000 today, the total price of the house will be reduced by 50,000, and then a treadmill will be given away. The daughter-in-law was immediately interested and wanted the free treadmill. Then there was a joke that no one could believe, buying a suite for a treadmill and going into a bunch of debts.

10, the husband always has to drive to the field for business, the wife is not at ease, let him install a GPS locator for the car. The little daughter heard it on the side and asked curiously, "Mom, what is a GPS locator?" The wife explained: "Put it on, no matter where Dad drives, we can know." The little daughter was happy after listening to it and said, "Daddy, then you can also install one for the brother next door!" Mom asked, "What's for him?" The little daughter smiled and said, "When I play hide and seek with my brother, it will come in handy!"

11. College final exam, exam physics. A few people encouraged our class to pass on the answer. After leaving the examination room, everyone asked Xueba: "Why is there one less, the last question, are you not?" Xueba calmly replied: "The first question will not..."

12, buddy is a braggart king, every day will listen to his various bragging. That time at dinner together, he drank too much and bragged: You go to my restaurant to eat, as long as you mention my name, the owner will definitely give you a discount! The next day, I went to their restaurant to eat. When it was time to check out, I mentioned the big name of the buddy. Unexpectedly, the boss's face changed drastically, and he immediately handed over a dozen tattooed men, surrounded me, and had to let me pay back the 2,000 yuan of food money owed by the brothers before I could leave, otherwise my legs would be discounted!

13, I saw an ant in the kitchen, and then took a piece of sugar and put it in front of him, it touched it and called my companion, I immediately picked it up and ate it, and said happily: "The companion of this ant must think that it is a liar!" ”

14, of course, cotton also has the advantage that cotton itself is more delicate and soft to the touch, less irritating to the skin, and has a certain skin affinity. It is not easy to start static electricity. Cotton fiber itself is not easy to conduct electricity, and has a certain degree of hydrophilicity, for autumn and winter tired of "cracking static electricity torture", it is still good. The most important thing is that cotton clothing is relatively cheap and cost-effective. So wear it if you want to, spend less money, and maybe reduce the family conflicts caused by money.