1. The female thief went to DaZhuang's house to steal, stole 300 yuan, and went away, and that night the female thief returned and woke up the sleeping Da Zhuang. Da Zhuang: "Who are you?" ''Female thief:' "I am a female thief."

1. The female thief went to DaZhuang's house to steal, stole 300 yuan, and went away, and that night the female thief returned and woke up the sleeping Da Zhuang. Da Zhuang: "Who are you?" Female thief: "I am a female thief, I stole 300 pieces from you, and now I give it back to Da Zhuang: "You have entered the wrong door, I have not thrown money!" "Female thief: You can't be a person with a conscience, my diamond ring was lost when I was stealing at home, you should return it to me quickly, otherwise I will call the police!" The female thief went to DaZhuang's house to steal, stole 300 yuan, and left, and that night the female thief returned and woke up the sleeping Da Zhuang. Da Zhuang: "Who are you?" Female thief: "I am a female thief, I stole 300 pieces from you, and now I give it back to Da Zhuang: "You have entered the wrong door, I have not thrown money!" "Female thief: You can't be a person with a conscience, my diamond ring was lost when I was stealing at home, you should return it to me quickly, otherwise I will call the police!"

2. A farmer enters the city and sees the billboard that reads: Apple discount price 4688! The old man was shocked and thought: Who ate it? Then walking forward, I saw a billboard that said, Xiaomi Mi 2399, the old man thought: Eighty percent are liars! I saw a sign that read: Little Pepper only 998! The old farmer couldn't help it, and picked up the mobile phone to call his son: "Baby! Don't work, go home and farm, hey this is going to be sent! ”

3. Once I was idle and bored to buy color drift, actually planted 5 million, and then all day big fish and meat delicious and delicious, all of a sudden fat to two hundred pounds. When I was shopping today, I saw an old man selling slimming plasters, saying that the stickers were effective, invalid refunds, and 7 days can lose 20 pounds. When I got home, I remembered that I forgot to ask where to post, so I opened it to take a look. There are only three words written on the instructions: "Stick to the mouth!" ”

4. A few adults led a child to buy something, the little girl turned around three times, it seemed that there was nothing to buy, her grandfather spoke: pick it at will, and what grandpa bought for you. At this time, the little girl chose four or five toys with a lightning speed, and said while taking them: My grandfather is a delicate person, and I should not be happy if I don't buy him!

5. On weekends, I drive more than 30 million Rolls-Royces to dinner. As a result, just out of the door of the villa, I was chased and scolded by a sister!! I just wanted to open my mouth to scold, and when I saw her appearance, I was fascinated at a glance. My sister said, "I'll fix your car, don't think about anything else." "I made an appointment the next day at the auto repair factory, and my sister brought a middle-aged woman over. The woman's foundation was slightly thicker, the corners of her eyes were raised, and she had done beauty at a glance, and it must have been the mother of this sister-in-law. I said to my sister, "What's the matter, I still brought my sister to make a big noise!" As a result, the sister gave a blank look: "This is my mother!! But the sister's mother was very happy to hear it. After a month, I got my wish to hug the beauty!!

6. Because I am afraid that my future child will inherit my single eyelid, I have not wanted a child. In the end, I was unexpectedly pregnant, and my husband encouraged me to give birth to this child. Now my daughter is 5 years old and yesterday I took her to the hospital for a vaccination. The daughter said innocently, "Mom, what are we going to do?" Me: "Of course it's an injection." Daughter: "Why do you want to get a needle, what did the needle do wrong?" Doesn't the needle hurt? After 5 minutes, my daughter began to cry: "This is a needle hitting me, this is a needle hitting me..."

7 The chairman of the board of directors specially cut the door, often let us work overtime and do not give overtime pay. Last night, the chairman of the second child Xi Tian Guizi invited guests to dinner, after drinking and eating, the chairman asked everyone: At the door of the delivery room, the doctor came out and told me that after my wife had given birth, what did my brother say in a word? What everyone else said was: Son or daughter? Only drunk me, especially loudly said: Is it dead or alive!

8. Drinking home in the middle of the night, entering the room to see his wife and the next door Lao Wang in bed, suddenly angry, grabbing two dogs and men and women is a beating, after beating up a little sober, look at the side, I, lean, into the wrong door, quickly apologize to Lao Wang and his wife, said that drinking high into the wrong home, Lao Wang grabbed him neckline: "You TM into the wrong door I can understand, but you don't have a wife you don't know yourself?"

9. The female thief went to DaZhuang's house to steal, stole 300 yuan, and went away, and that night the female thief returned and woke up the sleeping Da Zhuang. Da Zhuang: "Who are you?" Female thief: "I am a female thief, I stole 300 pieces from you, and now I give it back to Da Zhuang: "You have entered the wrong door, I have not thrown money!" "Female thief: You can't be a person with a conscience, my diamond ring was lost when I was stealing at home, you should return it to me quickly, otherwise I will call the police!" The female thief went to DaZhuang's house to steal, stole 300 yuan, and left, and that night the female thief returned and woke up the sleeping Da Zhuang. Da Zhuang: "Who are you?" Female thief: "I am a female thief, I stole 300 pieces from you, and now I give it back to Da Zhuang: "You have entered the wrong door, I have not thrown money!" "Female thief: You can't be a person with a conscience, my diamond ring was lost when I was stealing at home, you should return it to me quickly, otherwise I will call the police!"

10. I married a beautiful wife with money, but my personality is a bit domineering, and I can't say one thing at home. After dinner, my son was in his bedroom and couldn't do his homework. His wife taught him: You see your father, he looks like a bump, he doesn't have any money, why did his mother marry him? I just think he has culture and ability. You study well, grow up, and marry a beautiful daughter-in-law like your mother in the future! The son looked at his wife in horror, gritted his teeth, and threw the book aside: No more reading! Save yourself the future from getting angry! #年度搞笑名场面 #