My cousin was newly married yesterday and is admitted to the hospital today. I went to see him with a gift, and my sister-in-law was standing in front of the hospital bed, with a shy face. Taking advantage of my sister-in-law's exit, I asked, "What are you doing?"

My cousin was newly married yesterday and is admitted to the hospital today. I went to see him with a gift, and my sister-in-law was standing in front of the hospital bed, with a shy face. While my sister-in-law was out, I asked, "What are you doing?" Cave flower candle night fight? Cousin: "When I woke up this morning, your sister-in-law found that there was one more person in the bed, and she kicked me out without even thinking about it!" ”

2. Once in a busy street, I saw several people flirting with my sister. I rushed straight up and dismissed them all. Just the two of us, want to go up to greet it, beauty directly: "Ask you a math problem, answer it correctly and follow you, 3-8 =?" Me: "Where you say it is where it is." Beauty: "Okay, let's go." "I was lucky enough to have a neighbor say this.

3. A little story of a family that I have finally come to believe in true love in the world. Today I talk about it, hoping to help you on the road to pursuing love. Qingmei and Bamboo Horse were originally a couple, but a green tea came, disturbing their happy lives. Since then, the green plum bamboo horse has parted ways, and the green tea has lived a happy life."

4. My family has been growing tea in the mountains for generations, and I have never been to the city since I was a child. When I was a child, I used to make ear scoops from the wire that tied the fence. Once, when I plucked my ears, I accidentally dug out a very thick and hard type of ear SHI. At that time, the curiosity was serious, and he studied it in his hand for half a day. In the end, I felt that dongdong was probably an accessory in the ear or something, and put it back in the ear...

5. It's almost the end of the year, my parents will always urge Lao Jia to find a partner, this year decided to start first, rented a girlfriend Zhenxin back to his hometown. Say good things in advance, and the things given by parents and relatives should be returned to themselves. Then after going home, there were a lot of relatives and friends at home. To Zhenxin is to stuff red envelopes and send things. When she was about to go back, Zhenxin looked at herself with tears in her eyes and said: "Or let's just get together, I can't bear this money and things."

6. In class, the teacher tells a story when he tells the students about the role of the group. The story goes something to the effect that a sheep leaves the flock and is eaten by wolves. After telling the story, the teacher asked: Students, if this sheep honestly stays in the flock, it will not be eaten by the wolves, right? A little boy stood up and replied, "Of course, yes, but it will eventually be eaten by us."

7. I recently bought a Bluetooth speaker, as soon as I get home my mobile phone will automatically connect to the Bluetooth speaker, I will play music, dance at home, play a lot. Once, in the dead of night, Mom and Dad were already asleep, and I was alone in the bed of the room secretly watching a movie on my mobile phone. You know, just when the performance was intense, there was no sound!! It didn't help me to turn on the volume until I was drunk, and it didn't help to plug in the headphones, so I was very confused. Then my door suddenly opened and my dad threw the Bluetooth speaker at my window.

8. I went to university at Tsinghua University, and it was only an hour's train ride from school to my house. Once I ran home without greeting home, and when I got home at night, I found my mother at home. The next day, he was woken up by the landline at home, and he picked up the phone in a daze: "Hey..." Dad was stunned and shouted: "Who are you?" How in my house! I woke up instantly and shouted, "Dad! The father was instantly at peace: "Oh son, when did you come back?" "Me: ...

 #Funny# #搞笑段子 #