Experiencing something for the first time is not the same as the mentality of experiencing something for the Nth time, just like when someone asks what is the difference between doing something bad for the first time and doing something bad for the Nth time, someone replies like this—
"People have an angular cube in their hearts, and when they do something bad for the first time, the square will roll up, and their hearts will feel pain and feel uneasy, but the number of times they do bad things is more, the edges and corners are smoothed, and people's hearts will become numb."
Therefore, the number of times and time of the same thing is experienced, and the whole person gives people a different feeling, such as habituation, such as indifference, such as not being surprising, etc., and such a mentality is also applicable in the relationship between the sexes.
Psychological research has shown that if a man has been exposed to many members of the opposite sex, these 3 traits will be obvious.
Calm mentality, talk and laugh
01) I remember when I first went on stage to give a speech when I was a child, my nervous hands and siblings were at a loss, and my voice was trembling, afraid that I would say the wrong thing and then laugh generously.
Later, the number of speeches was more, and I felt that there was nothing terrible about this matter, and I would not be nervous anymore when I was skilled, so slowly, I became more and more confident and generous when I spoke, and I could even do off-the-paper speech.
There is a flywheel effect in psychology, which refers to the fact that in order to make a stationary flywheel rotate, we must at first push it with a lot of force, circle by circle.
After reaching a certain critical point, the gravity and impulse of the flywheel will become part of the thrust, at this time, we do not need to spend more effort, the flywheel will still rotate rapidly, and it will not stop rotating.
This is what we often say that everything is difficult at the beginning, but as long as you are skilled, you will not feel how difficult it is.
02), and in the relationship between the sexes, many boys must be nervous the first time they talk to a girl or go on a date, because they have never been exposed to such a thing before, so they are usually nervous to the point of being overwhelmed.
However, after they have been exposed to many members of the opposite sex, they have become accustomed to contact with women.
Therefore, in the days to come, when they meet women again, they will naturally not be nervous, but will be calm and self-assured, talking and laughing.
Familiar with women's psychology and understand all the preferences of female groups
I remember that there was a boy who was particularly popular in the girl group in college, not because of how handsome he was, but because we girls were very interested in things, he also knew well, and we would have a lot of common topics when we got along with him.
At first, we just thought the guy was more interested in these things, but later we learned that he had a lot of girlfriends.
Every girlfriend will instill something interesting about the girl group, and he will naturally know something about it.
In psychology, there is an organizational identity, which refers to the fact that the members of the organization are consistent with the organization they join in terms of behavior or concepts, and they will feel that they have a rational contract and a sense of responsibility in the organization.
At the same time, it also has an irrational sense of belonging and dependence, as well as the results of dedicated behavior to organizational activities on this psychological basis.
For men, if they want to have a common topic with the other half or the opposite sex, they need to unconsciously have some organizational identity, so that it will be easier to promote feelings because of the same frequency resonance and homogeneous attraction.
Attitudes towards gender relations are indifferent
01), Liang Zhengxian in the TV series "Thirty Only" when he got along with Wang Manni, he felt that he loved each other very much, sweet words, luxury goods, luxury cars, and even in order to give Wang Manni a blow, he also went to the place where she worked to announce the relationship between the two people, and even Wang Manni herself felt that she had met the person who loved herself the most in the world.
However, in this game of feelings, only Wang Manni believes that it is true, and Liang Zhengxian has always been a scene, so when he announces the end of the game, he will turn around and leave so dashingly, so he will not drag mud and water.
In fact, such a thing Liang Zhengxian has not been carried out for the first time, in his emotional world, it is so easy to relax, when interested in the good management, not interested in the withdrawal of the time, and such a dashing is the first time to manage love men will definitely not be reflected.
02), a person experiences more, sees more, then for some things also feel accustomed to, so in their world, there is no essential difference between possession and loss.
Without other personnel, we have no right to judge whether others are right or wrong, but for us, if we just treat each other as friends, there is nothing to worry about, just treat them normally.
But if it is a different feeling for the other party, then it is necessary to think carefully, after all, the other party is free to let go, if we blindly invest, do not doubt, the hurt must be ourselves.