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Author: More more, original author of the emotional essay
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law actually needs to be maintained by both parties, and many times, it is not that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is poor at the beginning, unless it is the kind of person who is not married, and the two sides are not accustomed to each other, and there is already a gap.
Otherwise, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually good from the beginning, but because of many things, it is slowly consumed, the patience of two people is consumed, and the gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law begins to arise, and it becomes intolerable.
If a woman meets a good man, she is actually very lucky, and this man can handle the relationship between herself and her mother-in-law.
Playing a lubricant effect in the middle, not only can coax the wife to be happy, but also to make their mother happy, which will resolve the contradiction between their wife and mother.
Mother-in-law are from the daughter-in-law, in fact, the mother-in-law hopes that they can find a very sensible daughter-in-law, if the daughter-in-law is very sensible, very good at running their own family, the mother-in-law is definitely very happy.
If the daughter-in-law does not care about anything, and it is too much, the mother-in-law will definitely be unhappy. If the mother-in-law has a lot of management, and it is particularly stubborn, the daughter-in-law will definitely not like it.
So two people are mutual, there is no good for no reason, and there is no good for no reason. Smart women actually know that they can't be tough with their mother-in-law, why should women be embarrassed by women?
Mother-in-law does not have to embarrass her daughter-in-law, unless it is a very vicious mother-in-law. In fact, there must be methods, means, and routines to treat your mother-in-law.
In this way, the mother-in-law is coaxed to be happy, so that the mother-in-law is happy, and she can naturally be happy.
Many women know to treat their mother-in-law as if they were mothers, which is actually not right, you can be spoiled by your own mother, you can be willful, you can be lazy and rely on her, and your mother will forgive you and tolerate you.
But your mother-in-law will never tolerate you, and you must have a distance and be polite to your mother-in-law, but you must also be humble.
You are not related to your mother-in-law, because she is her son and you live together, your three views, living habits are different, there are differences and contradictions is a very normal thing.
Smart women will master some of the skills and routines of getting along with their mother-in-law. With the mother-in-law, smart women know "three don't do".
The first is not to do: you can't do something without a bottom line
Women must be tough when they should be tough, and they must have their own bottom lines and principles. On the basis of respecting your mother-in-law, you must also adhere to your own bottom line and principles.
Before we talked about many mother-in-law's excessive requirements, some mother-in-law asked their daughter-in-law to buy a house for their brother-in-law, or asked their daughter-in-law to support their sister-in-law. Such demands are simply unreasonable and excessive.
As a daughter-in-law, you didn't spend a penny of her money or let her feed you before you married into their family. You have your own parents, you have your own income, and you have your own abilities.
Why do you have to look at her face for everything, so these very excessive and unreasonable requests, you must reject them all.
But if you agree to her request, you will not be able to get rid of her later. Therefore, we must adhere to our own principles and bottom line, and we must resolutely not agree to what we cannot agree to.
If you let her grab your handle and make her feel that you are a weak and wavering woman, she will definitely become more and more arrogant every day.
There are some small things that are harmless, if it doesn't matter, don't worry about her, just let her go, some big things, as long as it involves your own principles and bottom line, you must refuse!
The second is not to do: not to do things that are easy to provoke contradictions
Don't expose your emotions with your mother-in-law and provoke things for no reason, so it is easy to deteriorate the relationship between two people.
In fact, the quarrels between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are some trivial matters, and in serious matters, they are discussed together by everyone, and they cannot be quarreled.
If you really stir up trouble because of something very small, and then make a big deal out of it, and the relationship with your mother-in-law deteriorates, it is not worth it.
Don't do anything to confront your mother-in-law, it won't do you any good. If there is a contradiction, throw it to your man, let your husband solve it, go and tell your mother-in-law, you don't want to be that bad person, your husband is her own son, she will definitely not be angry with him and he has a lot of heart.
Smart women do this, and even if there is a contradiction, she will throw it to her husband.
The third one is not to do: not to give up on oneself
Many women lose themselves after marriage, give up their jobs for the sake of the family, for the sake of their children, enter their own circles, and devote themselves to the family.
Before there was a woman who married her husband, her husband was also a mother treasure man, listening to her mother everything, so when the mother-in-law said that she wanted her daughter-in-law to quit her job and be a full-time wife at home, she also agreed, because her husband also agreed, she could not help it, and had to compromise.
When she really worked as a full-time wife at home and asked her husband for living expenses, her husband said that she had no money and said that she spent a lot of money.
However, obviously, the money is basically not used on themselves, they are all buying things for their children and buying things for their families, and they are basically thrifty and thrifty, and rarely spend money indiscriminately.
At this time, the mother-in-law came out again and said that the daughter-in-law would not live a life, did not know how to save money for her son, and did not know how to run this family.
At this time, the woman completely broke out, and she realized that the decision she had made was very wrong. The mother and son clearly only wanted to find a free nanny, only to find a woman who was at home with children and did not spend much money.
Such a thing of giving up the self, do not do it as a woman's absolutely. To be a woman, you have to love yourself first, you have to have your own way of supporting yourself, don't feel that your man feeds you, you are spoiled.
If he doesn't feed you one day, you'll fall to the bottom because you're completely dependent on him and his family, but people don't really respect you.
Smart women know that marriage is not poverty alleviation, and if you are married your quality of life is declining, and your material foundation is not satisfied, you will not be happy.
A little more about:
Smart women know these "three don'ts" and these three don't do.
In fact, it is very simple to talk about principles, keep the bottom line, and then resolve the contradiction to the lowest point. I don't want to have a head-on conflict with my mother-in-law.
Get along with your mother-in-law, you must remember, don't smell very strong, women are made of water, you do a gentle as water woman, your mother-in-law naturally will not find you trouble every day.
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Author: More more; emotional original author, more out of your emotional story
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