Growing up a child, happy a family,
Influencing a society.
The vision of parents determines the starting line of their children.
The parents' hearts determine the pattern of how their children look at things.
The level of parents determines the path under the feet of children.
8 cartoons, let you see clearly the difference between reliable parents and unreliable parents. Work with you to be a reliable high-level parent!
1, you give your child's companionship, 90% is "fake"
The school held a parent-teacher conference, and a principal said in the lecture:
"You look at the school, the child's report card is sent out, from the back to the front, the worst grade child, must be the parents with the least company." 」
Those children with excellent grades are not only because of their own self-awareness, but also because their parents pay more meaningful companionship to education.
However, what exactly does companionship really mean?
There are some parents, busy at work, in order to create a good learning environment for their children, in order to "school district room" running around, rarely leave time for families and children.
There are some parents, the whole family is on the battlefield, grandparents and grandparents are around the child all day, cooking and washing to pick up the child, dressing and feeding with homework, not leaving a little time for themselves, and not giving the child room alone.
Take care of yourself, run a good family, pay attention to your children, and companionship is not completely occupied, nor absent-minded, but real.
May parents in the world understand:
With 10% of the heart, accompany for 10 hours, it is better to use 100% of the heart, accompany 1 hour.
2, full score parents to see the process,
Failing parents only look at the results
There is a very classic advertising slogan, everyone must have heard of:
Life is a journey, and what you care about is not the destination, but the scenery along the way and the mood of seeing the scenery.
For travel, the destination is important, but blindly thinking about the destination, eager to arrive early, but will miss a lot of the scenery in front of you. Keep a good mood, look at it slowly, and move forward slowly, it is not a good thing.
The same is true for children's learning. If parents only care about the outcome of a game and only care about the numbers on the report card, they will miss a lot of their children's growth.
lose in hake, but gain in herring.
Perhaps the child has not been able to achieve the desired results, but in the process of hard work, he has harvested happiness, harvested good qualities, and gained a lot of things that are more meaningful than achievements and results.
Without seeing the efforts of the child in the process, it is impossible to fully accept the child's body and mind.
Learning to appreciate the efforts of children in the process is a compulsory lesson for every parent.
3, educate children can not rely on others, can only rely on themselves
Bai Yansong once said very directly in an interview: "Many parents will blame the mistakes of educating their children on schools and teachers, in fact, what needs to be reflected on most is the parents themselves." ”
Parents are a child's first teacher and eternal homeroom teacher, and although this truth sounds "vulgar", it is the truth.
Teachers have the responsibility to teach and educate people, but frankly, it is difficult for teachers to take care of every child, especially the children's personality and moral character.
It is the parents who really get along with their children day and night and have the deepest impact on their children.
Parents should never fully count on others to educate their children.
4, your good mood, is the child's good weather
Educating children with emotions has become a common problem among many parents.
If you often deny children, then be sure to note that it is time to change your attitude.
Often deny the child, the child will gradually lose self-confidence in the "blow education", lose the courage to try, become inferior and cowardly, and become doubtful of themselves.
If you often bring your emotions in work and life to your children, praise your children when you are happy, and ignore or deny your children when you are unhappy, then you must also change yourself.
Bringing your own emotions to your children will make your children feel insecure in family life, and you don't know when your parents' emotions will fall on you.
A low-value, unconfident child is raised in this way.
Agree with teacher Yin Jianli's words: "Educating children is nothing more than talking to him well, not being in a hurry and not getting angry, and doing this, you will be 80% successful." ”
If you do, your child will be very lucky.
5, do not let children make mistakes, is the biggest mistake in education
Once heard such a story. Three mothers and three children out of the house came across the same road, with rough roads and small potholes.
The first mother said: "This road is too dangerous, you can't walk, you will fall, let's go back." ”
The second mother said: "Child, this road is not easy to walk, mother hold you away." ”
The third mother said: "Child, this road is a little difficult, but we have to go to the destination, we must take this road, mother leads you, we slowly walk past." ”
As a result, it is conceivable that the third child has successfully walked a difficult road under the guidance of his mother, and since then he has encountered such a road, will not be afraid, will not shrink back, and can go on alone.
This road is the way out, but also the road of life.
There are roads where the child must go by himself, and some mistakes, the child must make their own mistakes.
Without harming others and touching the moral bottom line, parents should allow their children to have the opportunity to trial and error.
Let the child know that no one can never make mistakes, and it is important that we learn from mistakes how to correct mistakes and improve ourselves.
6, smart parents, encourage children
Bad parents, hit the kids
"If you look at someone else's children, how can they do so well?"
"Even if you still want to go to XX school, don't look at your own pounds."
"Forget it, I don't think you can do it, let's give up."
Would you be happy if your child compared you to someone else's parents all day long?
Parents must remember that other people's children have never been a benchmark to stimulate their children's efforts to move upwards.
Every child has its own characteristics, and breaking through themselves is a victory. Encourage children to be brave and look at their choices with an appreciative eye.
7. High-level parents as guides
Low-level parents only lose their temper
The philosopher Pascal said, "Man is a reed that thinks." ”
Whether or not you know how to think is the key to whether a child can become a talent.
Children with independent thinking ability can maintain a calm heart in a turbulent society, will not go with the flow, will not be moderate, they are sober and self-aware, and they can always move towards their goals.
And children's curiosity is the first step to inspiring thinking.
In the process of growing up, children often have some manifestations of curiosity germination. Some parents will be angry, some will stop it, and high-level parents know how to use their children's curiosity to trigger their children's thinking.
Parents should keep their children curious and guide their children to explore.
8, the child is not your hope, you are
Many parents make the same mistake: pinning all their hopes on their children.
Unfulfilled wishes when you are young, I hope to be fulfilled by children.
Therefore, parents strive for the best educational opportunities for their children, take their children to expensive cram schools, and buy the best school district houses for their children.
However, parents are reluctant to invest in themselves.
The child is a copy of the parent's life, and your current life is a portrayal of the child's future life.
A family that does not have a book in the family and whose parents do not read books cannot raise children who love to read.
Parents run their own and work hard behind the back, is the best benchmark and example on the road to children's growth.
A child grows up only once, and missing it can no longer be recovered.
May you and I see our own problems in these eight comics, and then slowly correct them.
Find out the problem as soon as possible, improve it as soon as possible, and walk with the child, so that education has no regrets.