"Sister-brother love" or "yearless love", like the mainstream model of "male and female" love in the eyes of the world, is a game of mutual attraction and admiration between two people. However, it cannot be equally blessed and respected as the mainstream model of love, and people often hold a sense of curiosity that "sister-brother love can even blossom and bear fruit", waiting to see the ending.
In secular values, once a woman is no longer young and attractive, she loses her attraction to men, and marriage and love are threatened. On the other hand, women will also feel that they are older than the man and are more likely to be abandoned and betrayed in the future. This has caused many people to be not optimistic about "sister-brother love".
However, according to statistics, now, the number of sister-brother love marriages is increasing, and the marriage of "male and female" is gradually accepted, but it is easier for men to accept "sister-brother love", and women are worried.
Why do women have a lot of concerns about "sister-brother love"? I interviewed several netizens who had had this experience to try to understand their true mindset. In fact, the failure of "sister-brother love" is not only the pressure of parents and the surrounding theory, but also more because of the woman's mentality of gaining and losing, and the obsession of hoping that the other party will be more mature.
Miss Lee, has broken up
I am afraid that the future appearance gap will be large and the marriage will be unstable.
My ex-boyfriend is 5 years younger than me, is my colleague, treats me very well, always calls me "sister", at first, I didn't mind much, purely as a brother. After a long time, I unconsciously developed feelings for each other, and he actually confessed to me. I hesitated for a long time, emotion triumphed over reason, and we fell in love.
When my family knew about it, they tried their best to oppose it, and they brought out a lot of big truths to analyze to me, and I was very distressed during that time, and I didn't know where to go. On the one hand, I feel that my family is very reasonable, on the other hand, I can't give up this relationship. It wasn't until my cousin divorced because her husband cheated on a young girl that I made up my mind to end this "sister-brother relationship" that was not favored by everyone.
It is said that it is "forty-one flowers for men, forty tofu residue for women." "Women are indeed ageless. Although at that time, my little boyfriend and I looked like they could still match, but I would definitely grow older than him when I had to have children and take care of housework in the future. I don't want others to say that I'm old like a, like his sister I can't accept. In case he thinks I'm old and doesn't want me at that time, I really regret it too late.
Besides, after all, I am 5 years older than him, and it is estimated that his parents will oppose it at that time, instead of being troubled at that time, it is better to cut the mess quickly, and the long pain is not as good as the short pain.
Miss Zhao, in love
Some mind about age, more worried about his mental immaturity, quite insecure.
My boyfriend is 3 years younger than me, and when I first met, I don't know his real age, he looks pretty mature. It wasn't until we settled on a relationship that we realized he was younger than me. Seriously, if I had known his age in advance, I certainly wouldn't have developed with him. I still mind a little bit about age.
After knowing his real age, I have thought about breaking up, and my friend advised me that it is not a big problem for men to be younger, is there a saying that "female juniors hold gold bricks"? The most important thing is to see whether he is mature, as long as he is mentally mature, has three positive views, and has the ability. I'm right to think about it.
My boyfriend still knows that it hurts, every time I have unhappiness can coax me, go out shopping, big bags and small bags are on him, a little laborious work has been done by him. It's just a little bad, I don't think about it, I'm particularly impulsive, I'm really afraid that he will cause something to come out, always have to remind him, sometimes he is not happy, think I'm long-winded. Sometimes I feel a little tired, thinking that if he can mature a little, how good it would be.
We've been talking for almost two years, and he hasn't proposed to me yet, saying he's not in a stable career right now and asks me to wait for him for two years. Last year, Kan Qingzi and Ji Chenling's breakup still touched me. Seriously, I'm also worried that my youth will feed the dogs.
Ms. Meng, married
The age gap is there, worried that he is unreliable and will have no results.
When I was not in love, I was particularly disgusted by sister-brother love, saying that I could not fall in love with a boy younger than myself. Because women are originally more mature than men, finding a younger one than themselves is not like raising a son. However, later, I found that my feelings could not be stopped, and I actually fell in love with a big boy who was 5 years younger than myself.
After I met him at a friend party, he liked to talk to me as soon as he had troubles and happy things, and he always said that I was gentle and considerate and understanding. Seriously, I didn't even know I was that good. Sometimes we also make dinner alone, and when we come and go, it will naturally get better.
Because the age gap was there, there were many friends who advised me at the time, saying that he was too young and immature, and that being with me was just a momentary passion, just playing. He also said that I was not young enough to afford it. In fact, I was also a little worried, but I was very happy with him, and I think that was enough.
Fortunately, after talking for more than a year, he proposed to me, and we finally persuaded both parents to cultivate the right results. He said that I was more mature, sensible, and humble than him, and this was what he appreciated the most. And I was often infected by his sunny extroverted personality, and after being with him, the mentality was much younger. However, I sometimes think that his style of doing things is childish, I feel like a child, and I can't help but talk about him, but every time it is until the point is reached, he does not resist much. Later, I will consult with me on big things and small things. We are now three years old and living happily.
In fact, for women, choosing "sister-brother love", you must believe in your own charm, do not panic because of age, do not fear because of time, when you live well enough, strong enough, charm will naturally not diminish. Choosing "sister-brother love", he will calmly accept the fun and vitality of the other party, do not hold an obsession to transform him, and with the increase of his experience, he will naturally mature.
Fall in love, go light, who said that sister-brother love can not become a model couple. Zhang Ailing said: "Are you young? It doesn't matter, after two years it will be old, youth is not rare", if the age and appearance are the first thing of love, it will naturally fade and love. In fact, age is never the reason why a woman is not loved, it is arrogant and self-pitying.