My friend Xiaoxia is a cake shop, and a guy came here a few days ago. Let Xiaoxia hide the ring in the cake when making the cake to surprise her girlfriend. Yesterday the guy came and had a very bad temper

My friend Xiaoxia is a cake shop, and a guy came here a few days ago. Let Xiaoxia hide the ring in the cake when making the cake to surprise her girlfriend. Yesterday the guy came, very grumpy as soon as he arrived at the store, he patted the table: where did the ring I let you hide go, and I didn't eat the ring when my girlfriend vomited. As a result, Xiaoxia groaned: I saw that the ring was beautiful and put it on my hand, and I forgot to put it in.

2. "Honey, will you forgive me if I do something to hurt you in the future?" I asked as I looked at the little woman lying in my arms. She said solemnly: "Non-principle things, I eat soft and do not eat hard, in principle, soft and hard do not eat!" I suddenly slapped her on the buttocks, then pulled open the zipper and laughed, "Quick, it's still soft."

3, funny paragraph: One year, the sky was in a drought, there was a person to find a living immortal to ask for rain, the living immortal burned a piece of incense, handed him a sealed note said: "When it rains, you can take it apart and look at it, otherwise it will not work." As soon as the man came home, it rained heavily, and he opened the sealed note and looked at it: "It's raining today." The man exclaimed, "Ah! The Living Immortals are really gods! ”

4, sudden brain hole: a village, poor mountains and bad water, most of the villagers are irredeemable superstition. In the deepest cave of the mountains lived a demon who demanded that people pay tribute to him a girl every year or else disaster would fall. So every year the villagers would kidnap the poorest, loneliest, most unreliable child and throw her into the cave entrance. Then Mr. Devil would sponsor the girl to go to college in town.

5, it is the weekend again, the first thing to bring is a good mood, busy and tense work for a few days, it is time to give the body and mind a relaxing holiday. I don't know how my friends spent these two days. I like to stay at home, even if it is a long vacation, I don't like to run around, I think it's good to be at home. Rare relaxation of two days, of course, the first day is definitely a lazy sleep, sleep to the natural awakening of the taste is simply not too good, usually every morning is inertia by the alarm clock wake up, that ten thousand reluctant, wash face and teeth are closed eyes to complete.

6. When the school travels once a year, the boys and girls in the junior high school always play separately because of their different interests. Girls walk around in swimsuits, showing themselves on the one hand and enjoying the sunshine on the other. The boy rolled up his pants and caught small fish in the water. One of the teachers who guarded the children sighed and said, "I don't remember when I was in junior high school, girls were so mature. "Of course there is, but you were busy catching small fish!" Another teacher said calmly.

7. Before marriage, the woman's language is Hokkien dialect, which is very loud; the man's language is the northeast dialect, which is very bold. After a year of marriage, the woman's language became Shanxi dialect, sour feeling; the man's language became Beijing dialect, more and more grandfathers. After three years of marriage, the woman's language was changed to Sichuanese, which was somewhat spicy; the man's language was changed to Shandong dialect, and the smell of green onions in his mouth was also very strong. After seven years of marriage, the language of men and women is consistent, either with dumb language or body language, of course, in order to enliven the atmosphere, it is inevitable to hang up the color!

8. Xiao Shen and classmate Xiao Li are secretaries in the same unit. After a long time, Xiao Shen felt that the leader was better for Xiao Li, for example: the leader called Xiao Li "plum, plum", very kind, to himself is "Xiao Shen, Xiao Shen", lukewarm. One day, Xiao Shen and Xiao Li said this, and after Xiao Li listened, he sighed and said, "Alas... Have you ever seen a leader chase a female subordinate called a sister-in-law? ”

9, I grew up insecure, when I was in college, I liked a student sister. After my fierce pursuit, my sister was with me. After I graduated, I immediately took her to get a marriage license, and the staff in charge of registration looked familiar. I said hello and said: Aren't you busy today? The staff also recognized me and said: Yo! How did you get here again? Then, I was broken up.

10, the school security is not good, there are often social miscellaneous people in and out, one night after self-study after class, a couple was robbed during the small lake in the school, the boy was injured, the student's parents went to the school theory, accusing the school of not installing street lights or something. The school replied: "They don't go where there are street lights!" ”

1 Charles said to his fiancée, "Honey, look at this necklace, there are exactly 22 pearls on it. Why 22? Same age as you. It turned out that this was the case, and the fiancée secretly blamed herself, if only I had told him the true age of 30.

12, the boy triumphantly said to the girl: "Wife, I have increased my salary, and my monthly salary is six thousand." You just quit your job and stay at home as a full-time wife! I raise you!!! The girl shook her head, and the boy angrily accused the girl: "When a woman is married, she will stay at home and teach her children." The girl was silent and looked at the bottle of more than two thousand eye creams on the dressing table...

13, a friend runs a flower shop, one day, a guest ordered 24 roses and asked to send them on behalf of them. Because the man was a regular customer, my friend sent 6 more roses. It didn't take long to receive a call from a guest to blame, and it turned out that the guest had sent a card to his new girlfriend, which read: "A rose represents one year old, and these roses represent your flower-like age."

14, when I was 25 years old, my parents added a sister to the family, and I have been very precious to her since I was a child. Just now my sister and my son had a fight, and before they had fought, she cried, and I stared at my son angrily and blamed him loudly. At this time, I found that after so many years, it has not changed, I am still the most distressed about my sister, there is only one woman in the world that I feel that I do not allow others to cry her, that is, my sister. Other girls crying makes people feel a kind of want to protect, but my sister is really ugly when she cries.