★ The rich woman gave the abbot a Maybach at the end of the previous year, and the master had to go back to her mother's house to show off with her sister. It happened that the sister-in-law's boyfriend was also there, and at night the young man and the abbot were arranged to sleep alone upstairs

★ The rich woman gave the abbot a Maybach at the end of the previous year, and the master had to go back to her mother's house to show off with her sister. It just so happened that the sister-in-law's boyfriend was also there, and at night the young man and the abbot were arranged to sleep upstairs in one room, and the master and the little sister-in-law slept downstairs. Early in the morning, the mother-in-law was downstairs to order breakfast, and the abbot was standing on the balcony stretching his waist when he got dressed, but he caught a glimpse of the sister-in-law sneaking out of her boyfriend's room with sleepy eyes. At breakfast, the abbot quietly told Shi Tai about this matter, and Shi Taibai glanced at him: Don't you know that my sister has sleepwalking? The abbot still did not understand the style and said sharply: Then why didn't you see her swimming in the wrong room?

★ A friend in his shop was a drinking kitchen knife slashed a knife, hiding in time, cut not serious back stitches three stitches, afterwards the other party said that the wrong person recognized, the police said that the other party at most according to the picking quarrels and provoking trouble, how to do follow-up? It has been 3 days, and the other party's family has not come to the incident.

★ Sleeping at one o'clock in the morning every day has become a habit, and it is common to be late and not to go to work. Recently, the unit got a new monthly attendance award, which began to be implemented next Monday, and I secretly decided that I must not be late, so I took two sleeping pills on Sunday night, I went to the window at eight o'clock, and I woke up at six o'clock the next morning. When I arrived at the company, I was actually a brother! So I firmly told the director that I would definitely get the attendance award! The director looked at me quietly and sneered: Why didn't you come all day on Monday? Why did it go?

★ These two days do not know how, the legs are particularly sore. My dad heard people say that soaking feet in hot water can alleviate it, so he boiled a large pot of boiling water. As a result, I stretched out my feet and screamed hot. My dad reached out for the dating software water temperature, : where is hot, hurry up and soak while it is hot, the effect is good! Say grab my foot and press it into the water... Later, my whole foot was burned like a red pig's trotter...

★ My girlfriend and I grew up wearing a pair of pants, but after all, I was beautiful and gentle, and she was a woman. When she grew up, every time she quarreled with her boyfriend, she could beat her boyfriend to cry, and then her boyfriend would cry and beg for peace! Once her boyfriend came to me and cried when he saw me! I cared to ask him if he was arguing again? Her boyfriend wiped a tear and said: Xiaoya, you and her are the best friends, you tell me, is she not in love with me anymore? Why didn't she beat me up last night, but instead apologized? I haven't slept all night!

★ One of my buddies is better at repairing electrical appliances, and was once called to her house by my sister to help repair the computer. The broken computer could not be repaired, at this time the girl lay on his back and said: "This is very difficult to repair, it is better for us to rest, or not boring." The guy felt that his technical strength was greatly challenged and dirty, gritted his teeth and said, "I will definitely be able to fix it!" ”

★ After graduating from Nanjing University, I went to a company, and after unremitting efforts, I finally became a manager. On my way to work today, I noticed a grandpa pushing a stroller on the non-motorized road. There was a bank cash truck in the back that drove into the non-motorized road, and when he saw that the uncle was blocking the road, he kept honking the horn. Uncle looked back, completely ignored him, and continued to push the stroller slowly, muttering in his mouth: You are the car, I am also the car.

★ The other day I went to the RT-Mart supermarket, and I picked up a sack at the door with 20,000 yuan in it. I was so excited that I kept wondering how to spend this windfall. But I saw that the money was all new, rolled up in rolls, tightly wrapped in a handkerchief. I suddenly understood that this should be tuition, so I made up the picture of an old father carefully handing the money in his hand to his child. So, I immediately went to the school radio station with money, successfully found the owner, and sure enough, it was the tuition fee of others, and they all cried. I asked for her V-letter, and after a long time we became friends, and after a few days, she got along with her brother who was announcing the radio station.

★ Yesterday with the buddies on the string, the two of them drank a case of beer. When I was older, I said to my buddies: Yesterday my girlfriend wrote me a love letter. Dude: Really fake, you must have cheated on it! Me: That's right! I told her that I had written a 200,000-word romance novel, just 200 words to the end, and she wrote it to me that night!

★ Today my husband went to my father's house with two large bags of Maotai to drink with his old man's house. When he came back, his husband was already drunk, so he ran to the couch and started meditating, breathing. I smiled and asked him, "Why did you get the martial arts secret book?" After the husband had worked hard for a while, his face turned red twice, and then he said slowly: "Today I drank so much Maotai and I was blind when I spit it out." "#Funny# #搞笑段子 #