At night, when I fell asleep, I dreamed that I was resting with my female colleague, and she loved to grind her teeth, so I slapped her and woke her up. As a result, I was too hard, and I also woke up and opened my eyes

At night, when I fell asleep, I dreamed that I was resting with my female colleague, and she loved to grind her teeth, so I slapped her and woke her up. As a result, I also woke up, opened my eyes and looked, I was asleep alone in the single dormitory, where was the female colleague? I was going to continue sleeping, but I heard a woman crying, and I took a closer look, and there were really female colleagues, sitting across from me crying. I used to coax her, and she ignored me, and I said, "Don't cry, if you cry again, I'll kick you out, see if you're afraid!" She said, "Brother, you think wrong, I came from outside, I am not afraid at all, the person I feel afraid of should be you!" "I was stunned, look around, no, I just graduated, I don't even have a job, where is the single dormitory?" It must have been a dream, so I slapped myself a few times, anyway, it was a dream, and I was fierce. It really hurt, and I weakly asked her, "Are you my female colleague?" You're not going to scare me, are you? We must have a good relationship, right? The woman said, "Brother, in fact, we didn't have a good relationship before we died..." And so on, and I quickly said, "What do you mean?" What is pre-life? Is it the kind of life that gives birth to a child? "Oh, I'm very smart. The woman said: "Brother, you think wrong, it is the kind of life that is alive..." I was scared at that time, wow a cry, a man crying, crying, crying, it is not a sin, so scary who does not cry! As a result, after crying, I looked, hehe, I fell asleep at my house, nothing happened. So, I said to myself, "I cry when I have nightmares, and I can't do anything else." I heard a girl: "Brother, sometimes cry...."

1. I was sleeping in the bedroom, and suddenly my sister-in-law slipped into my bed, and she held me with both hands from behind and said: Brother-in-law, I like you so much, let me be your "temporary wife", and start to move my hands and feet. I said very angrily: What I like is your sister, and it is impossible to have anything to do with you.

When my sister-in-law saw that I didn't agree, she wanted to come hard and pounced on me again. I immediately slapped her in the ear and directly beat her to tears.

The sister-in-law cried and said: I hate you, and I will never see you again.

After saying that, she ran out of my bedroom, and I looked at my sister-in-law's back in a daze, did I do something wrong?

2. The farmer bought a box of consumable medicine, ate the rats and walked away with a big wave. The farmer was very angry and theorized with the merchant: "Your rat medicine is useless!" The merchant said: "This medicine needs to be taken with warm water to be useful." The next day the farmer found the merchant again: "I listen to you, I caught the rats and served them with warm water, but it is still useless!" The merchant asked, "How many times have you fed it?" The farmer replied, "Once." The merchant said: "Look at the instruction manual, 6 boxes a course of treatment." ”

3. The ex-girlfriend called and deliberately put the phone close to my son so that she could listen to my son's crying. Unexpectedly, her brother said a word: "I am pregnant!" I was stunned and said, "It's none of my business, we've both been apart for more than a year." The ex-girlfriend shouted: "Roll the calves, I want to tell you that I can't conceive a child because of you." Then I hung up when I was done. Leaving my wife and I staring wide-eyed at our son who had just reached the full moon in our arms...

4. . The brother-in-law's college entrance examination results came out, 326 points. The brother-in-law said: "Dad, I scored 326 points, how are you going to reward me?" The old man smiled and said, "Great son, I reward you with a big fragrant kiss." After saying a kiss on the brother-in-law's face, the brother-in-law was very unhappy, and Bao complained: "Lie to me again, there is no practical, what is the use of the fragrant kiss, stink to death." The old man smiled triumphantly, "Didn't you smell it?" It's an authentic kiss, with a smell of smoke and wine, and a strong smell of garlic! ”

5． When I was a child, there was a small color TV at home, and the whole village would come to my house to watch TV. The scene is very spectacular, full of people. One of my little hair came late and found no place to sit and was angry. Shout at me: Why don't you leave me a place, you see, I and my dad don't have a place to sit! Me: It's so late, what about your dad? Fa Xiao: Coming soon! With that, we both looked out the door, and then saw a big yellow dog rush in.

6． Yesterday and girlfriend went shopping, saw a bag very suitable for my mother, just my mother's birthday is coming, even if it is very expensive, but I still bought, afraid that my mother said I spent money indiscriminately, I gave a discount, said only spent 600 yuan. As a result, when my mother went to square dance that night, she told a few aunts that the square dance was no longer dancing, and ran to the mall to buy bags, and the salesman said: "80,000." "Big Mom didn't want to, didn't she say 600 when she came in the afternoon?" How could the salesman have won over these aunts, and finally these few

7. Drive my Ferrari to work and wait at the intersection for a red light. As a result, I accidentally slipped away and rubbed a Maserati in the back. The other female driver, when she spent money to buy lessons, lost more than 10,000, and the mobile phone turned. After a while, the other party called, and I thought I had repented and wanted to add money. The other party said: Brother, do you want to rub it twice? I want to change my bag!

8. It's about to be a New Year's Day party, and everyone in the class has to sing a song and can't help but prepare. When the literary and artistic committee counted songs, he asked me to share the table; what do you sing? Table Mate: Wait a minute. The literary and art committee members looked at him, turned around, and left. After a while, he turned around again and asked his table mates: Do you want to sing anything? The table mate wondered: Didn't I just say that? Who knew that the literary and art committee member said angrily: You said, you told me to wait for a minute, I have waited for a minute, you still don't say, what do you really want! Play me!

9. A college roommate is particularly smart, and today he came and told me a way to make money quickly. The roommate said to me: You give me a hundred dollars, I will take you as an apprentice, and I will immediately teach you the experience! I took the money out of my pocket and handed it to him, but he took the money and turned his head to leave, and I quickly pulled him and asked: You haven't demonstrated yet? He smiled mysteriously and said: I have finished the demonstration.

#Funny Scene of the Year # #搞笑一刻 #