A middle school student pointing a kitchen knife at his family
Once tutored and helped a middle school student addicted to games, the boy Komatsu (pseudonym), due to the long-term play of games led to a decline in academic performance, depressed and unable to participate in school. In desperation, the parents let Komatsu study at home and find a famous teacher for each subject. Since his parents are working, he cannot understand the progress of Komatsu's learning, and he hopes that Komatsu will tell his parents about his learning.
At this time, Komatsu was rebellious in his youth and did not want to do any communication with his parents, so when he saw his parents return, he locked himself in his room and said that he wanted to study. One night, Komatsu forgot to lock the door, and at about 2 a.m., his father heard the sound of a game in Komatsu's room, pushed the door in, and saw Komatsu and his alumni playing team battles!
His father was very angry, saying that he spent a lot of money to let him participate in tutoring studies, but he did not expect that Komatsu and the tutoring classmates played games until the early hours of the morning. In a fit of rage, Komatsu's father dropped his phone. Komatsu was also angry that he was disturbed by playing a game, and rushed to the kitchen with a kitchen knife and cried and pointed at his father.
At this time, Komatsu's father realized that there was a problem with the way he taught his children.
In my communication, Komatsu told him about his painful feelings and asked his consent to give him a depression assessment to moderate depression. In fact, teenagers who are addicted to games and adolescent rebellion are also victims of grievances, and they also bear a lot of pressures in learning, interpersonal and growth.
Second, the judgment of game addiction
The International Classification of Diseases establishes an entry for "gaming addiction", identifying multiple diagnostic criteria for "gaming addiction". WHO says confirming a "gaming disorder" disease requires symptoms to last at least 12 months and, if symptoms are severe, the observation period can be shortened.
The following 9 items meet 5 items and need to be paid attention to
[1]. Focus on the game even if you understand the impact the game has on you;
[2] Conceal your playing time from your family or others;
[3]. Relieve negative emotions such as guilt and hopelessness by playing games;
[4]. Loss of work and social life as a result of gaming.
[5]. Fully focused on the game;
[6]. When stopping the game, symptoms such as discomfort, anxiety, and irritability appear;
[7]. The time spent playing games gradually increases;
[8]. Inability to reduce game time, inability to quit games;
[9] Abandoning other activities and losing interest in other previous hobbies;
Third, the harm of game addiction
1) Irregular diet;
2) Decreased vision;
3) Decreased interest in learning, decreased grades';
4) Decreased physical resistance
5) Easy to fantasize, imitate the violent and bloody graphics of the game
6) Cause cardiovascular disease, gastrointestinal neurologic disease, tension headache, anxiety, depression, etc., and may even lead to death.
Fourth, how parents accompany watching game addicts
1) Recognize that the game has a strong addictive tendency and seductive effect, and reduce the blame for the addict.
2) Recognize that the child is a victim of addiction.
3) Have an open conversation with addicts and learn about their inner world as an equal.
4) Don't let addicts feel abandoned, lonely and helpless.
5) Cultivate the family's multi-faceted common interests and hobbies.
6) Actively encourage children to participate in psychological counseling and treatment.
7) Assist addicts to complete the psychological counselor's therapeutic homework.
8) Improve the bad environment or education methods.
Fifth, how parents should educate and accompany adolescents in the rebellious period
Many parents generally only care about their children's grade rankings and food and clothing, and rarely care about their children's mental health. For adolescents in the rebellious period, parents should pay more attention to their children's mental health.
1) Emotionally identify, empathize with, and understand the child
Children with paranoid personalities during the rebellious period always have many inexplicable troubles in their hearts, and these troubles are one of the reasons for the child's behavior paranoia. The best way to help them deal with psychological stress, especially when the child has some hallucinatory suspicions, is to identify with the child, stand on the same front as the child, listen to the child's opinions and ideas, and then seek ways to change according to the specific situation.
When the teenager's overall grades and rankings decline, he will feel that the teacher is not as enthusiastic about him as before, and he will not ask him much questions in class, and even his classmates will look at him differently. At this time, parents should tell their children: 'Victory or defeat is a common affair of soldiers', this test is not good, the next time to strive for a good test, the teacher will not snub you because you did not do well in the test once.
2) Give your child more positive hints and guidance
Positive cues and guidance work better than outspoken persuasion. In particular, the child's rebellious period falls into the quagmire of stubbornness and extremism, and the effect of only giving understanding and recognition is not obvious, and it is necessary to give them positive hints and guidance to let the child get out of the predicament by himself.
Three: Guide children to learn rational thinking
Adolescent rebellious children focus on perceptual thinking, acting on sensibility, and guiding them to think about things in a rational way. If a child fails the exam, he is always worried that the teacher and classmates will look at him with strange eyes. The more I think this way, the more I feel that others are paying attention to me. Parents can guide their children to think about whether they are also very concerned about other people's grades when others have bad test scores? In fact, not so many people have this idle energy. If you really think about it from this point of view, their knots can be unraveled.
Tong Zhaojing, a national second-level psychological counselor, doctor, postdoctoral fellow, associate professor, master tutor, has long been engaged in mental health education, psychological disorder treatment, counseling and counseling, group training and lectures of universities, primary and secondary schools, enterprises and institutions.
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