Dad forced me to go on a blind date with the son of my comrade-in-arms, and after meeting the man so sloppy, I lit a cigarette and said: I have the biggest shortcoming of this person, that is, I like all kinds of nightlife, and all kinds of men

Dad forced me to go on a blind date with the son of my comrade-in-arms, and after meeting to see the man so sloppy, I lit a cigarette and said: I have the biggest flaw of this person, that is, I like all kinds of nightlife, and date all kinds of men, just at this time, a handsome guy came in from outside: Dad, is this my marriage partner

2 On Valentine's Day, the rich man took his girlfriend to an upscale Western restaurant. Ordered a nine-minute cooked steak and a scrambled egg with leeks, and the girlfriend solved it at once. The rich man thought for a moment and said to his girlfriend: I will buy you one, okay? The girlfriend said: Don't eat, I want to eat grilled wings. The rich man persuaded his girlfriend: Eat the cone, eat some cold. The girlfriend said firmly: Grilled wings! They all said they wanted to grill their wings! So the rich man went to the ordering table and asked me: Waiter, do you have a way to stuff the ring into the grilled wings?

3 I was watching TV at night when my girlfriend's dad called her and she was in the shower and asked me to help pick her up. Excited, the first time, alas, you must know that I have not seen her parents yet. I picked up the phone and sweetly shouted: "Uncle good, I am Xiaohong's boyfriend, she is not convenient to pick up." Waiting nervously for a reply, she listened to her mother on the other side of the phone asking who it was, and then her father said, "The pig of our bailai!" ”

4 Because of the hard work, I was appreciated by the boss, and this month I was rewarded with 5000. So I planned to go to the bank and call my parents. On weekends, there are more bankers, and they sit in a chair and line up with a number. Bored, he folded the numbered paper into the shape of a heart. When I was proud, I was too late to dismantle it, and I handed it directly to the bank girl. The girl was stunned after getting it, looked at me, and decisively threw it into the trash.

5 Because the company has business, often run to the bank to handle, there is a very beautiful little sister at the counter, I added her V letter directly to confess to her. The counter lady asked me, "How much do you earn each month?" Me: "The money I earn can feed three women like you." Counter Lady: "Yes, when we get married, I will take my mother and my grandmother to live with us." ”

6 The local tycoon Konigsek icon suddenly leaked oil on the road, so he and his girlfriend took a taxi. When waiting for the traffic light, the girlfriend suddenly asked the local tycoon: How much is the BMW 760icon in front? The local tycoon said: Probably two million. Girlfriend said: What about the Bentley Bentayga next door? The local tycoon said: Almost four million! The master was very surprised and said: My God, I have to collect 3 months to collect a rent!

7 My cousin bought a cheap coat of poor quality, went out and was hit by a motorcycle, his leg hurt a little, and he hung up his clothes. The cousin went to the hospital wearing a forked coat. When the film was filmed and waited for the results, the cousin went to the hospital gate to smoke a cigarette, and just squatted down to meet a passerby who looked like a husband and wife. The young man looked at his cousin, threw a coin at his cousin, and heard the beautiful woman say: This is really miserable, there is not even a bowl in front of him!

8 My mother-in-law ran away with a rich man, and I took my father-in-law to live in our house. When I washed my hair today, I found that the shampoo was gone, so I used the washing powder with some hot water to iron the bottle first. Late to prepare to wash the bottle cut to make a small flower pot, as a result, the father-in-law asked me: daughter-in-law, our home shampoo is not newly bought, after washing, the hair is like adding gel water icon, straight. This, I really don't want to disturb his Yaxing.

9 On weekends, the cousin took his son to work overtime, and his son spent a picture of the Qingming River in the boss's office. The boss did not scold him, but also praised him for his good painting, and endured the pain of giving the calligraphy and painting exhibition ticket in his hand to the mother of the bear child, saying that he would take the child to increase his knowledge. The child was very angry and drew a pair of Ming Dynasty folding pages worth 80,000,000. Now my cousin and cousin work three jobs a day just to pay off the bills.

When I went shopping with my mother today, I met a person on the road who wanted to eat, and my mother told me: give him two dollars and let him go. I gave him a piece, he still refused to go, I gave him two more pieces, he was more arrogant, I had to throw him several pieces. The traffic police on the side of the road really couldn't look at it anymore and shouted at me: "You stop me!" Throw the stone that! ”

10 Early this morning I beat up my husband so hard that I realized I was wrong afterwards. So after work, he bought his favorite duck neck and went back to coax him, and Na Cheng thought he said proudly: "Don't." "I'm on fire too, don't pull it down!" In a fit of rage, he threw the duck into the trash and ran to the guest room to sleep. After a while, still worried that he would be hungry, he quietly pushed open the door and found that he was crouching in front of the garbage can and eating with relish!