The good health of the elderly is the greatest blessing for the children
— Remembering my mother
Tianjin University TEDA Hospital Li Qing
It has been half a year since my mother left, and qingming festival is coming soon, and I will talk about my mother.
My mother's family's health genes were not very good, and many members had high blood pressure. My grandfather had hypertension and cerebral hemorrhage, he died at a young age, and I don't remember what my grandfather looked like; my uncle had hypertension and cerebral hemorrhage 20 years ago, and then he completely changed his lifestyle, took regular medication, strictly controlled blood pressure, and is now 90 years old; my second uncle died of hypertension and cerebral hemorrhage in his early 50s.
My mom has been sick a lot since she was middle-aged.
When I was hospitalized for uterine fibroids, I was a fifth year old and interned in an affiliated hospital, which was in the mid-eighties, and the beds in large hospitals were more tense, but after all, I was a trainee student, and gynecologists were very concerned, so I didn't worry much.
Later, edema, fatigue, examination found that it was hypothyroidism (hypothyroidism), after a long time to take Yomethyl (thyroxine tablets), regular review, according to the results to adjust the dosage, but after all, I have graduated as a doctor, there is no trouble.
The most troublesome thing is high blood pressure. More than 20 years ago, she had hypertension when she was less than 50 years old, there was no good medicine at that time, blood pressure was always poorly controlled, and later because of the frequent occurrence of hypertension, premature atrial (atrial premature beat), ventricular premature (ventricular premature beat), once appeared atrial fibrillation, but also because of arrhythmia many times hospitalized.
Thankfully, I work in the hospital and don't have much stress.
20 years ago, Ambervi (irbesartan) just entered the mainland, my doctoral classmate Guo Yifang undertook part of the clinical observation of the study case, on the basis of other antihypertensive drugs combined with irbesartan, did not expect the effect to be surprisingly good, blood pressure quickly controlled, arrhythmia basically disappeared.
Later, diabetes was found again, but it was not serious, and metformin could be controlled.
After retirement, under the persuasion of her neighbors, she began to believe in a certain religion, initially afraid that I would oppose it and did not dare to tell me, and then carefully told me about this matter, I asked her what the content of religious activities is, she introduced me in detail the content of daily activities, all of which are preaching caring for others and being kind to others, but more about controlling diet, controlling their own behavior, etc. As soon as I heard it, this was no different from the healthy lifestyle advocated by our medicine, so I agreed.
My mother is very religious, not only the words and deeds are completely in accordance with the requirements, but also the lifestyle has also changed greatly, less salt, less oil, less meat, light diet, weight reduction, antidiabetic drugs have also stopped, there is only one kind of antihypertensive drugs left, regular physical examination test lists do not have arrows, and all indicators are very well controlled.
After nearly 20 years, he never lived in a hospital again.
These 20 years have been my happiest 20 years, and I have basically not bothered with my parents' bodies, nor have I generated additional financial burdens due to the diseases of the elderly. 10 years ago, I was recruited from Shijiazhuang to work in Tianjin, because the old man's health is good, and I have no worries.
Later, my parents also came to Tianjin with me, but they did not live in the same neighborhood as me, but lived alone. They were easy going and quickly integrated into the life of the community without any burden on me.
Until the end of August of the previous year, my mother felt a vague pain in the abdomen, and the examination found that it was pancreatic cancer, or exactly pancreatic hook cancer, a very, very painful kind of cancer.
She was 79 years old.
The tumor is too small for the ultrasound to see, and the CT examination only finds it. Angiography found that the tumor was so tightly linked to an artery that it could not be surgically removed, so he did chemotherapy.
The first course of treatment did not respond much, and when the second course was halfway through, nausea and vomiting could not eat, and the whole body was weak and difficult to get out of bed. My mom said to me: I'm so uncomfortable that I don't want to take medicine.
I said, OKAY, then we don't have to.
Later, I went to the Third Hospital of Beijing Medical College to do a most advanced radiotherapy radiation beam knife, and the tumor was once reduced. But pancreatic cancer, as the "king of cancer", was not "wasted", and later the tumor gradually grew, and the pain gradually intensified, and it could only be maintained by more and more morphine.
When the tumor was found, I told my mother the truth at the first time, and she was silent for a while and said, it doesn't matter, she can bear it. Indeed, she was strong throughout and always optimistic about reality.
For more than a year after that, my mother not only took care of herself, but also took care of my father. We went to see her and cooked as usual not to let us get involved.
Until a month before death, the condition began to deteriorate, the amount of food eaten decreased significantly, anemia, low protein, edema, and most importantly, severe pain. Oral morphine was difficult to control with 200 mg per day, and was later changed to subcutaneous injection. The last half month was spent in a semi-coma in very large doses of morphine and sedatives, and the last few days fell into a coma, and morphine was also discontinued.
From diagnosis to death, it lasted for one year and two months.
If my mom affected my life because of her illness, it was only the last 3 weeks, and these 3 weeks, compared to the decades she took care of me, were too small.
It is my regret that the time of taking care of my mother is too short, and it is also my blessing, and this blessing is also given to me by my mother.
After decades of clinical work, I have witnessed various disease tragedies. Some elderly people are seriously ill, causing a huge economic burden on their children; some elderly people are bedridden for a long time, dragging down their children's lives and work; some elderly people buy health care products indiscriminately, eat bad health care, or spend a huge amount of money, and eventually their children pay for it; some elderly people are sick for a long time, because of the contradictions between their children because of the cost of care and medicine.
And none of these things I encountered.
The elderly have a good health concept and a good body, which is the greatest blessing for their children.
Before my mother died, I agreed with my father and made it clear in writing: I would not go back to my hometown for burial, I would not buy a cemetery, and after I left, I would scatter the ashes into the sea.
The two of them still don't want to burden and drag us down.
This is my kind mom!
I am forever grateful to her!