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Around us, or from the Internet, we can always see such a phenomenon, people to middle age, men will look more and more down on their wives, some will choose extramarital affairs, and some will directly choose divorce.
When a woman encounters such a situation, she will only complain that she was blind and looked at such a thing. Women often only scold men for being wolf-hearted and think that men can do such a thing, that is, the nature is so, it is fundamentally bad. Women never think about the root cause of this.
When people reach middle age, men will look down more and more on their wives, and even betray their wives, although they are also related to men's conduct, but the fundamental reason lies in these three points.
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First: With the improvement of men's social status and personal ability, they have come into contact with more young and capable women.
Husbands and wives are able to know and love each other at first, and then become husband and wife, all because the two people are compatible with each other in all aspects. At that time, the two people were almost on the same level. So, the wife may be the only person in the circle a man can reach, and he can grasp and want to spend the rest of his life together.
But when two people enter marriage, in a family, with different divisions of labor, many times, women will tend to put most of their energy into the family, housework, parents, and various problems of children, so that women pour too much energy, which makes her have no extra energy to fight for her career.
Therefore, some women directly choose to give up their careers and choose to be a full-time housewife at home, while some women, although they insist on going to work, have been doing repetitive work for decades and have never wanted to climb up.
And men, after he becomes a family, will still put most of his energy on the career, because whether it is at home or outside, everyone will judge the success of a man by the success of the career, so whether he becomes a family or not, men will work hard and want to go to a higher level in their careers.
In this way, when people reach middle age, many women are still in the same place, even backwards, and these years of life have even made her lose the beauty of that year and become a mediocre and less knowledgeable middle-aged woman.
But when a man reaches middle age, he has almost already had a certain social status, and these years of struggle and effort have improved his personal ability, and his circle is no longer the original circle, and now the circle has allowed him to contact more young and capable women.
His vision was different. The women he came into contact with outside were all young and capable excellent women, but when he returned home, he saw an ordinary middle-aged woman who was a bit "crotch-pulling" in all aspects, and at this time, he would naturally compare the two. In this way, he will feel that he deserves better and can find better. With this kind of thinking, he will look down on his wife more and more.
This is human nature, you see better, you have the ability to get better, then you will not look at your original. Unless the man's sense of responsibility and self-control are very strong, otherwise, such a marriage will definitely have problems, either extramarital affairs or divorce.
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Second: the differences between husband and wife are getting bigger and bigger.
When people reach middle age, the difference between husband and wife is getting bigger and bigger, which is also the reason why men will look down on their wives more and more.
Whether it is a man or a woman, they like the excellent opposite sex, and no one likes the opposite sex who is inferior to themselves in all aspects. And once the differences between husband and wife are opened, there will be less and less common topics between the two people, and there will be no way to go together, and how to maintain the love of husband and wife. If you want to have feelings, at least you have to communicate.
If you want to communicate, the two people must be on the same level, otherwise the chicken and the duck will talk to each other a few times, and they will not have the patience to communicate with each other again.
So, how did husband and wife get to this point? In fact, when the two parties get married, there is certainly no big difference between the husband and wife, if there is such a big difference, they will not be married in the first place.
The reason why the differences between husband and wife are getting bigger and bigger is because this society has different requirements for men and women. The only requirement of this society for men is to have a successful career and be able to support their families, while the requirements for women are to take good care of the family. Although the requirements for women have changed with the development of society, if a woman only focuses on her career and neglects to take care of her family, it will still be condemned.
And the woman herself has a motherhood, so she will unconsciously pour more energy into the family. And people's energy is limited, when a person puts his energy in several areas, there is no way to do a good job. In this way, after years and years, when people reach middle age, men have achieved success in their careers, while women are still circling around the family and children.
By this time, the vision of the two people is no longer on the same level, and the difference has become bigger and bigger. In this way, men will look down on their wives more and more, he will feel that his wife has not seen, he will feel that after all these years, his wife has not grown at all. That way, he'll set his sights on other women.
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Third: because of the wife's perennial over-strength and other issues, men have accumulated too much resentment.
When people reach middle age, men have already made some progress in their careers, and they are also some influential figures on the outside, but when they get to the family, the wife who has become somewhat vulgar and makes him look down on him still treats him as the boy of that year, without any other eyes, and there is no slightest respect.
She would take care of him, she would command him, and she would even dislike him for getting in the way. And everything in the family, he must listen to her, otherwise there will be a big war. When he was young, he thought that his wife's domineering nature was very cute, but in middle age, his vision was broadened, and his wife also lost the beauty and spirituality of that year, at this time, he saw that his wife was no longer cute, he would only feel that his wife was messing around and too strong. This allows men to accumulate too much resentment.
As soon as this resentment increased, he looked down on his wife more and more. No matter what his wife does, in his eyes, it is vulgar, it is too strong.
Once a man has such an idea, he is very easy to be outside, and his eyes will unconsciously turn to the women outside.
In such a situation, the man is either having an affair outside of marriage or divorced.
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To sum up, everyone almost understands the reason why men will look down on their wives more and more in middle age. These three reasons are actually very easy to understand, but many people do not want to understand, everyone is not willing to think of human nature so bad, everyone prefers to believe that human nature is beautiful, any feeling, no matter what kind of change it goes through, it will not change.
But the reality is cruel, and everyone must face the reality. Any feeling will change, with the change of the social environment, with the change of personal situation, with the change of the family environment, the feelings of this person will change, no one can love a person unconditionally forever, any feelings need to be maintained.
If a woman does not want to encounter such a thing, then she must be vigilant, do not relax, and do not relax under any circumstances. Although it is also important to teach your husband and children after marriage, the most important thing is your own life. You gave up your life and your career for the sake of your family, for your husband and children, and in the end, what you wait for is your husband's dislike of you.
Can you really accept such a result? If you want a happy and happy family, you must learn to constantly push yourself, you must first be excellent, do not let yourself become a sloppy and dreamless middle-aged woman. You have to always have dreams, you have to always have light in your eyes, you have to make men think that you are excellent, and you have to make your children proud of you.
Only in this way will men not look down on you, and men will not compare those young and capable women with you, because you are good enough, even if you are old, you still have shining points in your body, and you are still attractive. This is the life a woman should have.
And the husband and wife live a life, the goal is to live a good life, want to live a good life, that is, to make each other feel comfortable, do not feel that the other party loves you, then the other party will let you, will listen to you. If you think so, it will only consume the feelings between two people. Therefore, in marriage, it is also impossible to be too strong.
Text/Fenghua