Text/Shamo Suxin
01. Preface
Going from love to marriage may only require a marriage proposal. However, from marriage to the rest of his life, it was a long life of chai rice oil and salt.
Even if you fall in love again, if the marriage is not well managed, it will also appear in a state of "loss" or even "bankruptcy".
Zhang Ailing said: "Love looks romantic and pure, but in the end the reality is cruel, because she can't stand the cooking of oil, salt, sauce and vinegar." ”
Divorce declares the breakdown of the marriage. It is not only the end of the marriage relationship between two people, but also a pain that goes deep into the bone marrow.
Deeply loved, when divorced, it will inevitably hurt the bones and hurt the heart.
A woman who pays her heart, longs to be with a beloved man, a glance of ten thousand years, the rest of your life to accompany each other. However, some love will eventually lose to the years.
In fact, judging whether a woman will divorce can be seen from the time of love.
In life, women who are really prone to divorce tend to have "casual" performance.
02, "casual" quarrels, love to win or lose
Two people stay together, in life, will go through a run-in period.
The run-in period may be the run-in of the three views, it may be the run-in of living habits, and it may be the run-in of personality and temper. Two people together, a little thing, may cause contradictions.
Women who are easy to divorce have one characteristic: love to calculate, love to win or lose, love to quarrel.
If two people are together, if they always quarrel, then the feelings will become more and more quarrelsome.
Liu Ying and Dong Xu in the TV series "Look, This Family" are a very loving couple.
However, because Liu Ying likes to calculate everything from pregnancy to after giving birth to a child, and if things large and small are slightly unsatisfactory, she will lose her temper.
Her husband Dong Xu lives with her, always respectfully apologizing and always coaxing her with kind words. Over time, he also felt tired.
Dong Xu's attitude and patience are a little bad, and Liu Ying will make more trouble. Two people together, arguing at every turn. In the end, the two men quarreled to the point of divorce.
A good marriage is a business.
No matter how good love is, it can't withstand the test of repeated quarrels.
Women who love to quarrel, if they can't see the good and receive, can't actively repair feelings, then they will eventually chill the man's heart.
03, "casually" mention divorce, weak problem-solving ability
The operation of a marriage actually relies on two people "sewing and patching" together.
When there is a problem with the relationship, if both people actively solve the problem, then the relationship will definitely get better and better.
On the contrary, if there is a problem with feelings, the woman will "be angry" to mention the divorce, then the man will listen more and will take it seriously.
Because, women are casually mentioning the habit of divorce, they will continue to send "the signal that she is disappointed in the marriage and has lost confidence", so that men will gradually lose confidence in marriage.
Women who casually mention divorce tend to have weak problem-solving skills. Only through the "divorce" as a threat, let the man compromise with her. In fact, it will only backfire.
Women who are easy to divorce often like to mention divorce at will, and their enthusiasm for solving problems is very weak.
Casually mentioning divorce will gradually disappoint men, make men lose confidence in marriage, and at the same time, they will also have the psychology of resistance, and gamble on divorce.
04, "casually" give up the self, live a very cheap life
A person's attraction comes from the value she lives out.
The more valuable a person's life is, the higher her charm value will be. Conversely, the more worthless a person lives, the less attractive she is.
In marriage, women who are prone to divorce have another characteristic: "casually" giving up on themselves.
Women who live without ego, in the minds of men, live very cheaply. A woman who lives without an ego, in the world of the ego, lives without a sense of belonging.
In "The First Half of My Life", Luo Zijun gave up his decent job for her husband and attached himself to a man's life.
When she got married, Luo Zijun's husband said to her, "I raise you", and she was intoxicated in love and could not extricate herself. As she did not work for several years, she gradually lost her light in her husband's heart.
Her husband gradually began to look down on her, and the distance between her and her husband became farther and farther away.
Eventually, her husband changed his mind and divorced her.
Women who give up on themselves will live a life of gain and loss, and will live a very passive life.
In marriage, a woman without an ego is often not cherished by men.
At any time, women please do not give up on yourself casually. Because when you give up your self, you are giving up your wonderful life.
05. Summary
The most important premise for running a marriage is to learn to run yourself.
Learn to control your temper, improve your problem-solving skills, run your own business, and so on. The more women who know how to run their own businesses, the easier it is to be cherished by men in marriage.
At any time, no matter how much you love someone, don't live too casually.
Good love, good marriage, good life, rely on careful management and watering. If it is wasted at will, arranged at will, and treated at will, then it will eventually be disappointed by time and years.
On the road of life, treat yourself well and run your own life well. You deserve better happiness.
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Author: Xia Mo Suxin, a cutting-edge emotional tutor, a psychologist, a popular emotional writer with more than 1 billion people on the Internet, a happy woman management engineer, who has focused on emotions, gender, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law for more than ten years.