This article is original by Tu Ma Ai Na Na, all rights reserved, infringement will be investigated
For most families, when the young couple has children, the elderly in the family will come to the door to help their children with their children.
Compared with nannies, the elderly with children are both affordable and reassuring, and grandparents and grandparents can be described as the best candidates to see the baby.
However, due to different ideological concepts, there is a generation gap between each other, and families with elderly people helping to bring their babies are not smooth sailing, and many times, the way the elderly and children get along will also attract the dissatisfaction of young parents.
Colleague Li Fan is a treasure mother, after giving birth, the mother-in-law took the initiative to help the little two with a baby.
Li Fan was very touched by his mother-in-law's efforts at first, but after a period of time together, the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law gradually appeared.
What Makes Li Fan unbearable is that when there is friction with herself, the mother-in-law will always secretly say bad things about her in front of the child, so that when the child cries, she is a bad mother.
After careful consideration, Li Fan decided to invite her mother-in-law to go home and take the baby full-time.
In Li Fan's view, the mother-in-law does solve the problem of the child's eating and drinking, and also makes the home clean and tidy, but in the child's education, the mother-in-law has serious problems, so her way of taking the baby is completely "fake with the baby", over time, the child's growth will also be affected.
In real life, many mothers have encountered similar problems to Li Fan, they are grateful for the efforts of the elderly, and they also know that they should not pick and choose, but the state of the elderly and children when they get along has to make themselves feel anxious.
There are bao mama summed up the 4 kinds of "fake baby" behavior of contemporary elderly people, and many netizens have called out the truth after reading it.
The "fake baby" behavior of contemporary elderly people, each of which gives children a headache, is not easy to change
1. Indulge in your own interests and hobbies when you take a baby, regardless of your child's feelings and safety
In life, many elderly people have their own hobbies, but when children need to go to the door to help them with their babies, this part of the elderly in the child, there will often be addicted to their own interests and hobbies and ignore the child's feelings.
For example, the elderly are addicted to square dancing, putting the children aside and not asking, or the elderly taking the children to the mahjong table, completely disregarding the impact of the card playing atmosphere on the children.
In this regard, even if these practices are pointed out by their children, it is difficult for the elderly to correct them, after all, it is not easy to quit their hobbies.
2. Attitudes towards children depend on whether the child is at home or not
A mother once ridiculed her mother-in-law like this: When I was at home, she was a good and attentive grandmother, as soon as I went out, she immediately collapsed on the sofa, and she still did not know that I had installed a camera at home.
This phenomenon is actually very common, many elderly people's attitude towards children depends on whether the children are at home, in front of the children to be considerate and thoughtful to the children, when the children go out, the elderly people break the rules set by many parents for their children, completely release themselves.
3. Teach children to lie in front of their parents
This phenomenon of false baby often occurs after the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, when the mother-in-law is dissatisfied with the daughter-in-law but is not willing to swallow the voice, she will secretly say in front of the child that the daughter-in-law is not good, so that the child has hatred for the mother, in order to solve the happiness of the heart.
This approach is extremely wrong, no matter how irreconcilable contradictions occur between adults, they should not send resentment to children, let alone provoke contradictions between children and parents.
If the elderly in the family have such behavior, parents must resolutely stop it.
4. Stubborn and resistant to scientific parenting
Due to different ideological concepts, there are also great differences in parenting views between the two generations. Young parents with children will be more in line with scientific concepts, while the elderly with children will rely more on past experience.
Therefore, when two ideas collide, the elderly tend to insist on their own opinions and resist scientific parenting, and some elderly people will temporarily compromise, and when the children leave, they will still take the children in their own way.
In the face of this situation, many people will choose to communicate, but once the communication is fruitless, the contradiction will further escalate.
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