Children are the favorite of parents, so when facing children, we are prone to lose the bottom line and principles, and as soon as the child cries, the parents compromise. Crying and tantrums have become a trick often used by children, as long as their own intentions are not satisfied, they will start to lose their temper and cry.
Once, I went to a friend's house for dinner, she has a 5-year-old daughter, and she has been watching cartoons during the meal, and the food is not delivered to the mouth. The mother casually turned off the TV series, and the child, who was still laughing, threw away the spoon in his hand at once and began to cry loudly.
Grandma quickly stood up, turned the TV back on, and calmed the child's emotions, criticizing the mother: "The child's mouth is full of rice, how dangerous it is to cry like this." The child started watching TV again, and the meal was also taken by grandma to heat up. The mother was embarrassed and said: "This child is too impatient, and he starts crying as soon as he does not feel good." ”
We often see such children on many occasions, they can't get what they want, they start to lose their temper, and mom and dad compromise, and it's fine immediately.
Such dramas are staged in almost every family, but they are not good for the growth of children. Children are rebellious and disobedient, easy to form bad habits, can not control their emotions well, and will also lead to difficult interpersonal communication, can not withstand setbacks, and fragile psychological quality.
Finding the reason why children often lose their temper and helping children gradually overcome such habits is something that parents should seize the time to do. Children like to lose their temper and cry, probably for several reasons, let's compare and see what reasons their children are.
Children are naturally short-tempered.
Each child has a different personality, some children are born sentimental, some children are confident and cheerful, and some children have strong personalities and are more impatient. When he encounters setbacks, he usually can't control his negative emotions and expresses his dissatisfaction by crying, throwing tantrums, etc.
Children are spoiled and crying is a means of compromising parents.
Children like to cry their noses, and part of the reason is that adults are afraid to hear children cry. As long as the child cries, he can get the purpose he wants to achieve, so crying has become a means for the child to solve the problem.
Children have poor language expression skills and like to use crying to express emotions.
If the child can express his emotions in words, the phenomenon of crying will be much less. Some parents do not give their children the opportunity to express, always guess his intentions from the child's emotions, which will aggravate the phenomenon of children's emotional expression.
Children are ignored by their parents and lack a sense of security in their hearts.
Parents accompany each other, children get enough attention and love in their hearts, and children whose psychological needs are met will be more emotionally stable. On the contrary, children who are often ignored by their parents, their sense of security is not enough, they will have more restless emotions.
Crying can express a child's bad emotions, but it does not solve the problem. When a child encounters problems, he will only cry, which will also affect his growth and development in other aspects. Therefore, to improve such a situation, it is also necessary for parents to guide their children from many aspects.
Moms and dads understand their children's sensitive emotions and change the way parenting is taught.
Parents should understand the child's vulnerability and sensitivity, guide the child to be a strong and optimistic person from the front, give the child more encouragement and affirmation, help the child see more positive aspects of things, and help him establish self-confidence and security.
Parents train their children to use language to express emotions.
Children's language expression ability can be improved through training, we guide children to express their own ideas by speaking, when the child is reasonable, you can meet the child's requirements. When the child speaks, the parent must respond positively to encourage the child to speak out, rather than crying.
Change your attitude toward your child and help your child build self-confidence.
Children love to cry, and many parents are prone to be disgusted by their children's behavior, and even label their children negatively. Children who lack self-confidence are prone to emotional sensitivity and love to cry, we ourselves must control our emotions, as long as the child tries his best, do not criticize him, but should affirm and encourage his efforts. Children's self-esteem level increases, and when they have self-confidence, they will reduce the phenomenon of crying.
Parents should not be afraid of their children crying, just compromise.
Children love to use crying to solve problems, mostly because of their parents' doting. If parents always compromise when their children cry, it is easy for children to form bad habits. Children have done wrong things, there are unreasonable demands, we should resolutely refuse and criticize, do not be afraid because the child is crying. When the child is more emotional, we can properly deal with it coldly, wait for the child's emotions to calm down, and then patiently reason with the child.
An emotional parent can hardly raise a calm and rational child, so we must change our thinking mode and guide the child to solve the problem in the right way.