1, today and a female colleague to go to the hotel to open a room, finished she went to take a shower, then her mobile phone rang, I don't think much about it directly, after the answer to react is her husband. Witty I said: "Is it your mobile phone, I have been waiting for an hour, now people love to lose mobile phones!" Then his husband weakly replied, "Oh thank you." "Give me a thumbs up for my wit."
2. Dad worked in Moutai Distillery for three months, and he used all the money he earned to buy a Volkswagen Phaeton. I was not very sensitive to numbers since I was a child, because I couldn't remember my father's license plate number, so I often got into the wrong car. Once, my father came to pick me up from school, and I got into someone else's car again. Dad hated that iron was not steel, and he couldn't help it at the time. He carried me directly to the front of the car and shouted, "You show me!" Su K· BS555, the English letter is nose picking SHI, remember no! "This time, I really remembered!
3, when the old man was young, he was a small, and his back was full of tattoos. Coupled with his tall stature and two eyebrows are very fierce, my brother was a little scared when he saw him! After dinner, the husband drove his Maserati to the grilled squid stall in the night market, pointed his finger at me, and said, "If you don't treat my daughter well or make a mistake at work, that's where you end." I laughed and said, "Uncle, don't tease me, it's my neighbor who grills the squid, and he earns more a month than I do in months." ”
4, a few days ago, I was tricked by a friend to find a beautiful woman. After talking to her afterwards, she finally said: You are a good person. I said: Of course. She said again: Are you a good man who can give me a dollar? Me: Can it be, but is there any meaning? She said: No, I press the charge, 5 cents!
5. The building next to my house has a new mother and daughter. That girl was so beautiful, she was my dream lover. Didn't you hear people say that if you want to get off the list, you must first get the mother-in-law? So I went every day to send tenderness and courtesy to my future mother-in-law. Finally, one day, the future mother-in-law spoke: I understand what you mean, in fact, I like you a lot... Even if I am older than you are a teenager, can your family agree?
6. I spent 1299 yuan to buy a bottle of National Cellar 1573, and returned home to personally pour a cup for my wife. After my wife got drunk, I cheated her Alipay password and quickly charged 5,000 yuan of Huabeili to the game. When she learned of this, she had a big fight with me, and finally had a cold war with me, so I had to run to the small room to sleep. She took a large pair of scissors and cut a big hole in my mosquito net and said, "Hmm, let the mosquitoes bite you!" After a while, the wife came with transparent glue and glued together the freshly cut mosquito net! I was particularly touched at that time, thinking that my wife was a knife mouth tofu heart, which was still very good to me. I was just about to say something, she said to herself: the mosquitoes are almost in, can't let them run...
7, the nephew is busy playing games and is reluctant to take a bath. The sister-in-law really couldn't help it, and greeted the golden retriever at home: Three gold came over. The Golden Retriever took one look at it and paid no attention to her sister-in-law, who was angry and turned to the Golden Retriever: I can't count to three, and the consequences are at my own risk. Number of sisters-in-law: three! Directly picked up the slippers and smashed the golden retriever, and the golden retriever whimpered and turned upside down. Then the sister-in-law looked at the nephew, who immediately put down the mobile phone in his hand, and the rabbit ran to the bathroom.
8, these days the friend's daughter-in-law sneakily play mobile phone, in order to test his daughter-in-law, the friend used the trumpet plus his daughter-in-law! Friend: Beauty! I am free at night, are you free? Please have a late night snack! His daughter-in-law: Which one are you? Friend: I was the one you dated before, do you remember? His daughter-in-law: I am already married, please don't look for me again.?
9. After dropping out of high school, my brother-in-law went to work at the construction site. On the day of the payroll, he exchanged his first bucket of gold for a VIVO mobile phone. The first thing he did when he got the phone, he called the customer service girl and talked about everything. Finally, the customer service girl became impatient and asked: Is there anything wrong? The brother-in-law replied: Your advertisement says that charging is 5 minutes, talking for two hours, and I have come to check whether it is true!?
10, the little uncle often pulls to the overtime bar to drink, the bar owner's daughter of the national color tianxiang flowers and moon appearance, the little uncle fell in love with the girl at first sight. The little uncle went to talk to the girl on the pretext of drinking, and the two of them had a feeling. Just when the two men cultivated positive results, the little uncle caused stomach perforation and cirrhosis due to excessive drinking. The little uncle lying on the hospital bed sighed and said: What a red face! The girl hates the little uncle for talking badly, and wants to break up with the little uncle: this can blame me!
11. The brother-in-law has been to Korea and looks particularly exquisite, and there are many girls pursuing him. That time, the brother-in-law ate with a suitor. The suitor asked him: Which season do you like? Brother-in-law: Winter. Suitor: Why? Shouldn't it be summer? You can see girls in short skirts! The brother-in-law smiled evilly: You are too naïve, in the winter, the sauce bun of instant noodles is frozen into a piece, you can take it out in its entirety, and it will not be wasted at all! ”
#Funny Moment#Funny Paragraph# #搞笑幽默趣闻 #
![Without any accident, the Chinese men's football team lost again, and many fans on the first day of the New Year were a bit blocked. It's actually normal to lose this game because our team is currently facing no team[fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)