Source: Brainstorming Cat
What is the greatest sorrow of ordinary Chinese families?
It is to raise children as rich second generations!
Obviously the conditions are general,
Let the child have the illusion of a second generation
When parents are eager to give all the good things and all the love in the world to their children, they forget to tell their children one thing: the hardships of life are unimaginable.
The "care" of parents is undoubtedly a "poison" for children. Children enjoy everything with peace of mind, do not know contentment, do not know gratitude, do not know to be considerate of their parents, do not know that life is not easy. On the contrary, it also breeds a lot of vanity, laziness, and unlearned bad diseases.
In China's current society, the children of the rich are the second generation of the rich, with no worries about food and clothing, and a good life. But many working-class families with low incomes also raise their children as rich second-generation to meet the luxury requirements of children: mobile phones and computers are not Apple, and clothes and shoes must be Nike Adi.
I have a family of three, my parents run a small shop, and my daughter is in college. Due to the development of e-commerce, the small shop business is difficult to do, sometimes the couple is busy for a month and even the rent can not come out, the two usually eat at noon, even a meat dish does not dare to order.
But after her daughter went to college, she came back from the first holiday to ask her parents for an Apple phone, saying that her mobile phone was too cheap and she couldn't look up in front of her friends.
Then her parents dragged out the January payment, squeezed out five thousand yuan, and bought a mobile phone for their daughter.
There are too many parents like this in China. Regardless of the difference in family resources, they work hard and do everything they can to let their children enjoy the best living conditions.
Families are not rich, they feel that they owe their children, worry that their children will be compared to others, resulting in inferiority complex, so they are more pampered, spoil the children, no matter how tired they are, they are reluctant to let the children suffer.
So most of the children live an extremely hedonistic life, using the latest electronic products, wearing fashionable big brands, not diligent, not dividing the grain, and the clothes to reach for food to open their mouths.
Although caring for the next generation is a traditional virtue of the Chinese nation and is worth carrying forward, everything must have a degree, too much doting will go to the extreme, the "care" of parents, for children, is undoubtedly a blind "poison".
Children enjoy everything with peace of mind, do not know contentment, do not know gratitude, do not know to be considerate of their parents, do not know that life is not easy. On the contrary, it also breeds a lot of vanity, laziness, and unlearned bad diseases. As a result, the old people are rampant, and "white-eyed wolves" emerge in an endless stream.
Not long ago, Shanghai reported such an incident: a fat young woman dragged the hair of a sanitation worker on the street for several meters, and other sanitation workers rushed to the front to stop it. The reporter learned after the interview that it was the daughter who was asking for money from her mother!
The mother is 48 years old and has been working as a sanitation worker for more than 10 years, only a few thousand yuan a month. Her daughters and children are all there, and she also reaches out to her mother for money every three to five minutes, and insults, quarrels, fights, and fights when she does not give money...
This is the consequence of coddling, excessive love, will make children ignore the hard work of their parents, take all this for granted, and eventually become a nibbling old man, a white-eyed wolf.
During the Han Dynasty, Liu Bang, the ancestor of Han Gao, divided more than a hundred meritorious men, among whom Xiao He was Liu Bang's stable rear and contributed to the establishment of the new dynasty, so Liu Bang gave him a lot of fertile land. However, Xiao He resolutely did not accept it, but instead asked for a lot of barren sub-fields.
Liu Bang asked him why, and he said that poor land can urge his descendants to work hard and know how to be frugal. And the fertile fiefdom, the child is easy to become delicious and lazy, so that the family will slowly decline.
Sure enough, after a hundred years, most of the families of more than a hundred heroes had declined, but the Xiao He family was still thriving.
Zeng Guofan once said that if a child does not suffer, he cannot become a child. The child must give him bumps and sharpen him, not give him all kinds of excellent conditions.
In Zeng Guofan's family training, "poor" is the way of "good body". In a family letter to his eldest son Zeng Jize, Zeng Guofan said: "All the children of the family have the same food, clothing, and living as the Han shi, and they can become great instruments." This means that the more the children of rich families, the more the children of officials and eunuchs, the more they can be diligent and self-disciplined, and the more they can take the initiative to be like the poor people in material life, so that such children may become great instruments in the future.
No matter how good the education for children, it is better to let him personally feel the "not easy" of the adult world! As Zeng Guofan said: "In addition to reading, it is a very good thing for children and nephews to sweep the house, wipe the tables and stools, collect dung, and hoe the grass. ”
Today's parents always want to give the best conditions to their children, which is actually harming their children. In the process of growing up, the more abundant the material, the more the child can not know how to be grateful, the less he knows how to be diligent, eat and lazy, and harm others and harm himself. On the contrary, to give children the right education is to let children understand!