1. I was divorced for less than a month, and my ex-husband found a new partner. And lightning certificate, today is his big wedding day. In a fit of rage, I invited six beautiful women to his wedding and shouted: Husband I love

1. I was divorced for less than a month, and my ex-husband found a new partner. And lightning certificate, today is his big wedding day. In a fit of rage, I invited six beautiful women to his wedding and shouted: Husband, I love you. I will never forget the days we were together! At that time, the bride's face was black, and the whole audience was sensational. Then the ex-husband's mother-in-law's family and the ex-husband's family got into a fight.

★ My husband and I have been married for almost ten years, during which time we had a lovely daughter. As my daughter gets older, she becomes more and more distracted. Today, after my husband picked up my daughter and came home from school, he saw me sitting on the couch crying. Just hurry up and care: What's wrong? I covered my stomach with pity: my stomach hurt, it hurt. The husband looked distressed, and the daughter scornfully said: Dad, don't be deceived, the place where my mother's hands cover is not the stomach at all, maybe she doesn't want to cook at night.

★ Fa Xiao told Fu Er Dai to eat Haidilao, and Fu Er Dai ran out of money, so he asked his father. His father handed him 10,000 yuan, and the rich second generation said disapprovingly: "Dad, 10,000 yuan is not enough to spend a day." His dad: "Not enough flowers, right?" It's okay, I have a way. He took a hundred yuan, painted a few flowers on it, and handed it to Fu Er Dai and said, "Is this enough to spend?" ”

★ My brother, who works at Foxconn's electronics factory, goes out with his new female colleagues. When she returned, her brother said that he would take her to a very famous old shop to eat tofu brain, when the boss called and said that there was an urgent matter for them to hurry back to the company. After hanging up the phone, the brother relayed the boss's words to the female colleague, and then the brother asked her: "Do you understand what I said?" Female colleague: "Well, understood! That is to say, invite me to eat tofu brain, right! Brother: "..."

★ A rich man had a hard time returning home to check on his son's studies. He took the diary written by his son, and as soon as he read it, he angrily wanted to beat his wife. I saw that the diary said: Today Uncle Chen came to my house to play with my mother, saying that after I finished my homework, I could eat snacks. Then, Uncle Chen praised me for doing a good job, so he wrapped up my mother, and my mother told my uncle to be careful, and then my uncle kissed my mother and kissed me. The wife did not say that she beat her son after seeing the second goods. The son cried and said, "Dad, I made the punctuation wrong."

★ As a workshop director at Foxconn, this month's salary is 3,000 yuan more than usual. I thought it was a bonus from my boss, and I invited my colleagues to the hotel for dinner after work. When I returned home from a full meal, I received a call from the girl in the finance department. She said: I'm really sorry, your salary for this month is wrong, and the extra salary will be deducted from the next month.

★ In the evening, I had dinner with my colleagues in Haidilao after work, and after eating, I walked home. Walking along a secluded path, the light was dim, and the afterglow of my eyes suddenly swept into a white shadow. When I turned around, there was nothing, but I could always see a white shadow following me. Rushing home, he found that the white shadow was still there, so he was very scared. When I washed my face, I found a grain of white rice in the corner of my eye.

★ Recently, I have been working overtime regularly, and when I left the office on a big night, there was no one in the office, and after getting on the elevator, I suddenly squeezed in a girl. Then I pressed the first floor, but the sister pressed all the buttons over and over again, and I asked angrily: What do you mean??? The girl said: This is the self-defense technique I learned online, I can't let you know how many floors I have to go. Until the two of us left the company from the first floor together, I didn't understand what this was.

★ The key of the boarder is missing, and I specially found an old façade and looked at the key shop that has been operating for decades. After the matching was done, he was not at ease and tentatively asked: Master, do you want to check it again? The master smiled and waved his hand: "Those who came to me with the key will not come back." When I got home, I found that I still didn't deserve it, and I questioned him. The master smiled: I mean I don't deserve it well, and those who come once will not come a second time.

★ A rich man from India came to China to travel, got off the plane and booked a ticket back to India on the way to the hotel, and quietly left China without playing. After returning to India, the rich father asked his son strangely, "How did you come back when you first arrived in China?!" The son said with some trepidation: "It's not good, China is going to attack the mainland, the streets and alleys are posted with slogans, writing "print", "laser printing", "fast printing", door-to-door printing, 3D printing." If I hadn't run so fast, I'm afraid I wouldn't have seen you!" Father said: Thanks to the fact that you have learned a little Chinese before, thank you!

★ The company's two-hundred-pound daughter recently liked to wear ancient clothes and had to buy a lot of money every day. On this day, she wore the Hanfu she had just bought on the street, and she was a living Yang Guifei. Suddenly she was stopped by a handsome man, who pulled up her hand affectionately and said: A hundred years ago, you threw a hydrangea ball to invite relatives, and then a Xiucai caught the hydrangea ball, do you remember this? I came here to meet you! She blushed, and then her face turned red: Are you that Showman? The handsome man shook his head and smiled slightly: "No, I am the hydrangea ball."

★ There were two men telling stories together, and Xiao Liang said: My father has been to a small island far away, where there are beasts you have never seen before, and the most terrible thing is that there are cannibals! Xiao Ding said: I also want to see what the cannibal patriarch looks like. Xiao Liang looked at Xiao Ding and said: My father said that only brave, strong, calm, and reserved people can go, and you are too thin to eat.

★ When I came home from work, I found my wife sitting heavily on the living room couch. Asked her what was wrong, she had to fight with me, and she had no choice but to fight. I actually lost! I asked my wife curiously why she practiced her hands so much? The wife said quietly: As for your broken van without a booster, let the old woman drive for two years, that is, a cow and an old woman can lift up with you.

★ Using my father's credit card to tip a female anchor for ten consecutive days, a total of 820,000 yuan was spent, and the female anchor was finally impressed by me and became my girlfriend. That time I took the female anchor home, and the family was only my grandmother in her 90s. The 90-year-old grandmother was particularly happy and couldn't help but ask this and that. Her ears are not very good, and she speaks loudly. As the woman flipped through the family photo album, grandma pulled me aside. Then she yelled at me: Rest assured, I've taken off your photo with the woman before# What's funny today #Funny # #搞笑 #