My wife has a girlfriend, looks charming, charming, recently my wife is going to go abroad for further study, I can not accept long-term separation, and finally broke up peacefully with her. Before leaving, she brought her girlfriend to her

My wife has a girlfriend, looks charming, charming, recently my wife is going to go abroad for further study, I can not accept long-term separation, and finally broke up peacefully with her. Before leaving, she brought her girlfriend to me and said to me, she liked you for a long time, and now I give you to her, and you can get along well. In fact, I have long liked my wife's girlfriend. Now that my girlfriend has arrived in front of me, I am overjoyed. I took my girlfriend's hand and said to her, I'll treat you well. She snuggled happily into my arms. Sweetly said, being able to be with you is also the biggest wish of my life. I said happily, let's go out for a big dinner and celebrate. She and I found a very fancy restaurant. Ordered lots of goodies. She and I had a great time eating. He also drank many expensive red wines. At the end of the day, the service staff told us that we had spent more than eight thousand dollars. I want to use WeChat scan code to pay, but the WeChat balance is insufficient. I opened Alipay again, but there was no money in Alipay. And even the flowers are exhausted. I looked at her embarrassed and said, Do you have money? She said with a bitter face, I am all from the Moonlight Clan. She and I looked at each other and stood there in a daze. It was at this time that a personable man came along. He gleefully told us that we were his 100,000th customer. The store not only gave us a free order, but also prepared a big gift for us. The two of us were pleasantly surprised and followed the man out of the store. A brand new sports car was parked in front of the door. The man smiled and said, from this moment on, this sports car is yours. After saying that, he handed me the key. It's at this time. A middle-aged man rushed over with a group of bodyguards. He angrily grabbed the guy. A bag of things was found from his body. When I opened it, there were dozens of brilliant diamonds inside. Middle-aged people hate to say. You filial son! Although you are my adopted son, I treat you as my own son. I didn't expect you to steal my diamond. Thankfully, I met these two well-wishers. Otherwise it will make you run.

I remember once going to the male ticket's house was the menstrual period, and I went to the toilet halfway to change my aunt's towel, worried that his parents would see it and deliberately fold it and throw it in the trash. After a while, I heard the male ticket mother exclaiming, only to see their dog rushing over with a piece of white and red, tearing while running, the whole living room floor was covered with blood-stained white cotton, at that moment, I wanted to die...

My daughter-in-law hated me for using a Xiaomi mobile phone, and a rich second generation with Huawei p40 got along. I had to find a woman who was married twice, and after marriage we both lived happily. My wife woke up that morning and looked at me thoughtfully for a long time. I was a little flustered at the time, and according to experience, I must have dreamed that I had done something to be sorry for her, and wanted to take the opportunity to get mad. I immediately started to be strong: Daughter-in-law, what do you want to eat tonight? Last time you said you wanted to eat spicy crayfish, let's go tonight, right? Daughter-in-law: These don't matter, I had a dream. I immediately said: Daughter-in-law, dreams are all reversed, you must not take it seriously, I especially love you! My daughter-in-law immediately glared at me and said, "But I dreamed that you were very kind to me, especially well-behaved.

Voice to first love: I'm divorced, do you still consider it? Unexpectedly, although the hour was withdrawn at the first time, I still received a reply from the female supervisor: "I am very serious about my feelings, I hope you will not fail me, otherwise your promotion report will always remain in my drawer." "At this moment, I really understand the meaning of the dilemma, whether to push the boat along the water or stop at the right time...

I took 100 yuan of money to attend my classmate's wedding, planning to eat the money back. So at the wedding banquet, before everyone finished eating, they began to pack dishes. As soon as one roast duck came up, I put it directly into a plastic bag. The eldest brother said unhappily: You are too much, right? Even if you let everyone take a bite and then pack it! I said with disdain: Why is it so unpretentious? Wouldn't it be unhygienic for everyone to take one bite? I'm packing it up to feed my dog, in case any of you have an infectious disease, it's not good to infect my dog!

A college roommate was particularly smart, and today he came up and told me a way to make money quickly. The roommate said to me: You give me a hundred dollars, I will take you as an apprentice, and I will immediately teach you the experience! I took the money out of my pocket and handed it to him, but he took the money and turned his head to leave, and I quickly pulled him and asked: You haven't demonstrated yet? He smiled mysteriously and said: I have finished the demonstration.

Today my cousin came to the house as a guest and looked at me as I was watching "Classroom in the Air." The cousin said: "Cousin, you are not small, some websites as a brother I should also tell you!" I blushed and said, "Brother, that's not good!" Then my cousin told me the website, and I excitedly opened the computer and entered the URL! See the title above with high school student knowledge contest questions! My face was black!

A week ago my first love at Tsinghua called me to say she was getting married and invited me to go. I went with a twitch of my head, and when I got there, I saw that a few of my good buddies were there. In the end, everyone drank a little too much, and I stood up and said: The bride's ex-boyfriend stood up and we had a drink! Then I saw several people standing up, and my buddies also stood up, and the groom on the stage had a green face.

Today I was surprised to find that dad's salary card actually had 300,000 yuan!! I stole the money and bought a Volkswagen Magotan specifically for running didi. On this day, I pulled a girl. She had so much luggage in her big bags, and when I got to her house, I saw that she was inconvenient to help her move in. Before she could enter the door, she shouted into the villa, "Mommy and Daddy, I'm back, and my boyfriend is back." The second elder of her family came out very enthusiastically to greet her, and her nanny was sand chicken and fish. Now that I've been staying at her house for three days with a beautiful woman, how can I get her to pay me to get me home?

#Funny paragraph # #搞笑 #