Text/Little Snow Mom
Although the three children have been released now, there are fewer people who fight for the third child, and there are still many families who want the second child. Some young families may not have a great willingness to have a second child, but there are some middle-aged families who do have a lot of ideas about having a second child.
These families often feel that the eldest is already relatively old, staying in school for a long time, the home is relatively deserted, and the husband and wife take advantage of the fact that they can still have another one, so that the family will be more lively and happier in the future. But is it really good that the age difference between the eldest and the second is very large? Have you ever considered the boss's wishes?
Case:
Cousin and cousin brother-in-law in the family of the first child is a son, the son is 18 years old just went to college, the cousin is pregnant, at the beginning of the family are advised not to give birth, there are many reasons, there are physical reasons for economic reasons, in short, are advised not to give birth.
But the cousin and cousin brother-in-law wanted the child very much, and symbolically asked the eldest son, the eldest son had just gone to college, where he was willing to manage so much, no matter how the parents came.
The cousin and the cousin-in-law simply gave birth to a cross, and as a result, every summer and winter vacation, the cousin's eldest son will go home, either to help take care of his brother, or to help his father work for the family to make money.
For the younger brother and the boss is naturally liked, but then talk to the parents, when the parents said that in the future they are old, the body is not very good, the family will rely on him, the brother is still young in the future may also need your help to take care of, at that time the boss felt the pressure on his body.
After getting married and having their own children, they also have to repay the mortgage, but also to provide for their parents to provide for the elderly, but also to provide for their brothers to go to school, so that the pressure of the cousin's eldest son's life will only be great and not small.
It is reasonable to say that when to have a second child or not to have a second child, this is each family's own choice, but try not to exceed 12 years old, otherwise it will bring great trouble to the family and the future of the two children.
The age difference between the eldest and the second should not exceed 12 years old, for these reasons
First, the age difference is too large, there is a generation gap, and brothers and sisters are difficult to get along with
If the age difference between the two children is too large, the way the eldest and the second get along is not like a brother and sister at all, more like the boss with a drag oil bottle, the unilateral boss is paying, and in the future, it can only be the second elder who depends on the boss, and it is difficult to cultivate feelings.
But if the age difference between the eldest and the second is not very large, then they can play together, grow up together, communicate together, and the feelings of brothers and sisters are deeper, so it is better to say that the age difference between the second child is not too big.
Second, the age difference is too big, and the pressure of life after the boss is too great
The age gap is too big, and it is a disadvantage for the boss. Because the parents are getting older and older, the ability to earn money is driving backwards, and when the younger brother is older, the parents can't move, and at that time, the boss himself has a family, has his own children to take care of, and spends money outside the home.
Parents need to provide for the elderly, children need to be taken care of, families need to live, younger brothers and sisters will go to college in the future, start a family, these heavy pressures are all pressed on the boss, which is very unfair to the boss, parents can not be so selfish.
Third, after the birth of the second child, the parents favor the small one
We are all old people with "generational relatives", after the age is very "rare" children, then middle-aged families to have a second child is also very easy to do so, after the birth of the second child, most of the love is given to the small, very pampered. Although the boss is already old, he will not be jealous of the wind when he understands things, but in the end, his parents are also selfish and not very good for the boss.
Fourth, if you are too old, you need a second child, and the comprehensive risk is relatively large
If the age difference between the second child is too large, it means that when the second child is born, the age of the mother is also relatively large. There are many problems that may be encountered, such as whether the body can eat and drink after pregnancy, the problem of postpartum recovery, and the risk of miscarriage; including the economic ability to resist risks, whether there is enough economic ability to support the lives of two children and families.
To sum up, to have a second child or not to delay too long, it is best to the age difference between the two children is not too large, so that for the cultivation of the feelings of the two children, for the life of the family, are more sensible choices.
I am Xiaoxue mother, a post-90s mother, pay attention to me, and share scientific pregnancy and parenting knowledge every day!