Recently saw a video, a mother in Wuzhou, Guangxi Province, said that the first-grade daughter does not eat meat and vegetables, only eats white porridge every day, does not feed or refuse to eat, the mother is very distressed, the video was sent to the Internet to ask everyone what to do?
Only to see a bowl of white porridge in front of the child in the video, she bowed her head and refused to move, until her mother picked up a spoon to feed her, and then opened her mouth to eat.
The child is in the first grade and looks thin, but he never eats by himself, and every meal needs to be fed by the parents. Children will become like this, and parents have an unshirkable responsibility.
Some parents feel that their children are still young, they will not eat, or eat everywhere, simply feed by adults; some parents see that children do not eat well, eat a few bites and do not eat, in order to let children eat more, chase feeding.
Parents always have all kinds of reasons, under the banner of being good for their children, but they do not expect that their actions will ruin their children's lives.
The "diligence" of parents ruins the child's life
Wei Yongkang, who was once known as the "Prodigy of the East", mastered more than 1,000 Chinese characters at the age of 2, basically completed the curriculum of the junior high school stage at the age of 4, and went directly to the key middle school to attend junior high school at the age of 8.
At the age of 13, Wei Yongkang was admitted to the Department of Physics of Xiangtan University with high scores, and at the age of 17, he was admitted to the Chinese Academy of Sciences for master's and doctoral studies. Just when everyone thought that his future was bright, he was persuaded to return home by the Chinese Academy of Sciences after 3 years of graduate school.
One of the most important reasons is that he can't take care of himself for a long time, wei Yongkang, although he has a super high IQ, is a "life idiot".
All the while, his mother took care of all the housework, washing her son's face, washing his clothes... In order not to delay his son's reading, Wei Yongkang went to high school, and his mother fed him.
It wasn't until Wei Yongkang was persuaded to return home that the mother reflected on her own educational methods and began to teach her son life skills again, skills that should have been learned in early childhood, nearly 20 years late!
It is said that "lazy parents, diligent children", the lazier the parents, the more things the children need to do on their own, and the stronger the hands-on ability and autonomy. And parents are too diligent and do all the things for their children, which will make the children become low-energy in life, and may also affect the children's self-confidence and self-esteem.
There are many disadvantages to parents feeding
Feeding has a very big impact on children's physical, mental health, and living habits:
1. Affect digestion and absorption
Many parents like to feed while watching TV or playing with toys for their children, then the child will be particularly well-behaved, honestly eat, but in this way, the child's attention is on the TV, toys, no serious eating, easy to be choked, sometimes swallow dates to eat, affecting the child's digestion and absorption.
2. Destroy your child's concentration
When the child is fed, the attention will not focus on the meal, which is not conducive to the cultivation of the child's concentration. Children's concentration is poor, and it is easy to lose their minds and write homework after going to school, which directly affects the child's academic performance.
3, urge to make eating a burden
Parents urge children to eat quickly, chew quickly, and even count children because of impatience, which over time will make children think that eating is a burden, no fun, and will have resistance to eating.
4. Affect the cultivation of children's sense of autonomy and independence
Parents often feed, children will think that eating is not their own business, they are just assisting parents to complete the task, in the long run, the child's sense of autonomy is gradually weak, easy to develop dependence, low life ability and other bad habits.
Some children will also think that eating is something that can make parents happy, and will take the meal to blackmail the parents.
Neighbor Tao Tao ate well in the kindergarten, but as soon as he came home, he had to feed his grandmother, and if he didn't feed, he wouldn't eat, and his grandmother couldn't do it, and he chased Tao Tao every day to feed.
Sometimes the child just refuses to eat, and the grandmother is talking about it, and Tao Tao will say to the grandmother: "If I eat, you will show me TV", or it will say: "If I finish eating, you will buy me a Transformer toy!" ", for various reasons to blackmail the grandmother, the grandmother in order to coax the child to eat, always full of promises.
Although grandma has every need, Tao Tao still has various runs and various conditions every time he eats, and he never eats by himself at home, and the child is becoming more and more willful, which makes Tao Tao's parents very headache.
5. Affect the child's brain development
Children need to coordinate their hands, eyes and mouth to eat on their own, and the use of spoons and chopsticks can exercise the child's hand-eye coordination ability, help the development of the brain, and make the child more intelligent.
Children who are often fed, hand-eye coordination is relatively weak, which will affect the child's IQ development and have a very big impact on future learning.
How to cultivate the habit of eating independently in children?
Eating is human instinct, parents should let go as soon as possible, let the child eat by himself, is the first step to make the child independent!
1, start with simple food, seize the sensitive period
Babies from 8 months old, there is a desire to eat independently, they will grab food into the mouth, will grab the spoon in the hands of adults, this is a very important sensitive period, we must guide the baby to eat.
Give him some finger food when your baby is able to grasp to help him build confidence and exercise his finger fine movements. When your baby brings food to his mouth with a spoon, be sure to give praise, affirm his ability, and make him more willing to try to do it himself.
At this stage, the baby will definitely get food everywhere, we don't feel dirty, troublesome, the baby eats badly, don't let the baby try, be sure to let the baby do it himself, put a bib on the baby, spread the newspaper on the floor, you can quickly clean up.
2. Create a pleasant eating atmosphere and cultivate interest in eating
Children eat by themselves, will be slower, then we must not always urge children, the ancients also said "rice is not responsible", do not reprimand them at the dinner table, let the child maintain a pleasant mood when eating is very important.
In addition to the atmosphere, you can also start with tableware and food, choose cute cartoon tableware, and make a few dishes that children like or look good, so that children can have fun eating.
3. Develop a good habit of eating in a dining chair
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that starting with the addition of complementary foods, babies should learn to eat in a dining chair. This is not only to cultivate the good habit of the baby eating independently; but also to let the baby form a consciousness that sitting in the dining chair means that it is time to eat, to help the baby distinguish the boundaries between play and eating.
4. Let the child eat by himself
When children are eating, do not watch TV, play with toys, and concentrate on eating. When the child does not want to eat, be sure not to chase the child to feed a few more bites, and do not force the child to eat.
Parents decide what to provide for their children to eat every day, match the nutrition of each meal, prepare food, and eat more and eat less.
epilogue
Eating is a very small thing, but it is a necessary skill, we must give the child enough patience, believe in the child, let the child do it himself, even if it is occasionally one or two meals do not eat, hungry and hungry is fine.
Eating is the first step in cultivating children's independence, and when eating is taught well, children will also learn to dress themselves, wash their faces and brush their teeth, etc. Feeding can make children and parents relaxed for a while, but it will delay the growth of children and affect the child's life.