On the way to the growth of children, parents should pay attention to these 3 points

This is the 2278th article in modern parent education

Author: Time is shallow

There was a boy in his son's class, running around in class, without any sense of rules, and occasionally sitting in his seat, also to pull the little pigtails of the little girl at the front desk. The teacher reasoned with him, but he said, "Don't listen, don't listen, Wang Ba chanted the sutra." ”

Once, he punched a classmate in the face, and when his father found out, he beat him so hard that the little sticks were broken.

Dad's flattering educational philosophy is filial piety under the stick, and the child is very honest when he sees him, but it is honest for two days to beat him; the mother is weak and cannot change the way dad educates.

Later, I heard that the child threatened to jump off the building at school, and he climbed the guardrail on the third floor to jump, thanks to the teacher who carried him down in time.

Obviously, there are already many problems in children.

This can't help but remind me of the case of Yao Jiaxin, whose father said on Weibo: "In the matter of Yao Jiaxin, I have an unshirkable responsibility, I usually discipline my children too harshly, so that children are afraid to face after making mistakes, do not know how to deal with it, and eventually lead to a catastrophe." ”

Education is a practice with no turning back. For parents, what should they do on the road to education?

1

Self-care ability, build a solid foundation for children's growth

Wei Yongkang has the title of "Oriental Prodigy".

At the age of 2, he already knew more than 1,000 Chinese characters.

By the time he was 4 years old, he had finished his junior high school curriculum.

At the age of 8, he jumped several levels in a row to enter junior high school.

At the age of 13, although the fever affected his performance, he still scored more than 600 points and entered Xiangtan University, becoming the youngest college student in Hunan.

At the age of 17, he was admitted to the Institute of High Energy Physics of the Chinese Academy of Sciences and became a master's and doctoral student.

At the age of 20, he was supposed to have a bright future, but he was dissuaded from school.

Professor Li Meijin once said: "Children's problems are often created by adults, and every psychological or behavioral problem of children must be related to the behavior of parents and the way parents educate." ”

Wei Yongkang's mother, Zeng Xuemei, has high expectations for her son, although she has a good set of ways to educate her children's learning, but only ignores the cultivation of children's self-care ability.

Zeng Xuemei believes that "everything is inferior, only reading is high", in addition to reading, she does not let children do anything, long-term reading life, imprisoned Wei Yongkang's free development, but also let him lose the most basic self-care ability.

Image source: Panorama Vision

When he was in college, he didn't know how to add clothes and wore slippers in and out on very cold weather.

He did not establish a normal social network, did not see the notice of the change of exam time, and did not inform him of his classmates, resulting in hanging.

Without his mother's urging, he forgot to submit his graduation thesis, which directly led to his own dismissal.

Obviously, the accelerated life did not allow Wei Yongkang to achieve what he deserved.

Later, her mother Zeng Xuemei also realized her own education problems, took the time to cultivate Wei Yongkang's self-care ability, and asked him to help take care of his father who was paralyzed in bed.

After a period of training, Wei Yongkang mastered the basic ability to live, and a company threw an olive branch to him.

After marriage, Wei Yongkang had a son and a daughter, although his mother repeatedly stressed that he wanted to tutor his children to learn, but Wei Yongkang still did not agree to his mother's request, and with personal experience, perhaps he also wanted his children to have a normal life.

Obviously, self-care ability is the foundation of children's growth. My son's homeroom teacher once said to us: "At home, we must be willing to let children work, and housework can be properly shared by children, which can not only cultivate their ability to plan for various affairs, but also help them improve their grades." ”

Professor Li Meijin once pointed out: "If parents do not let their children learn to share things in the family from an early age, then the children will not have a sense of responsibility for the family. ”

Cultivating children's self-care ability is worthy of serious treatment by every pair of parents.

2

Gratitude education is a compulsory course for children's growth

Shakespeare wrote in King Lear: "An ungrateful child is more painful than the teeth of a poisonous snake." ”

Akira Kumazawa, a graduate of the University of Tokyo, who served as Vice Minister of Agriculture, Forestry and Fisheries and Japanese Ambassador to the Czech Republic, was supposed to enjoy his old age at the age of 76, but he had to take care of his 44-year-old son, Eiichiro Kumazawa.

Eiichiro Kumazawa has not been working. He was arrogant, showing off his family's political background on Twitter; he was profligate, swiping 320,000 yen (about 20,000 yuan) on his credit card for a month; he ate his parents' food and lived with his parents, but he had no gratitude to his parents.

Now that he had entered middle age, he was supposed to take on the responsibility of supporting his parents, but he was violent to his old father at home.

He said his mother was stupid, held a grudge against her and beat her, causing her to have a broken rib and suffering from depression. He even said that if there was a permit to kill, the first person he would kill would be his mother.

He claimed that since his parents had given birth to him, they should be held responsible until a second before his death.

Their house was not far from the elementary school, and one day there was a sports meeting at the school, and the children's very happy shouts made Eiichiro Kumazawa dissatisfied, he said, "It's really noisy, I'm going to kill these guys." ”

The helpless father was afraid that he would do something murderous, so he had to kill his son himself and call the police.

After the police arrived, Kumazawa calmly said that the reason he stabbed him to death was "not to cause trouble for those around him."

This caused a sensation at the time. For an old father who understands the law, how desperate it is to kill a son with his own hands.

Mr. and Mrs. Hideaki Kumazawa provided their son with a good material life, and even when Eiichiro Kumazawa went to college, his elderly father still went to collect garbage, send medicines and living expenses to his son every month.

But they didn't teach their children to be grateful, and Eiichiro Kumazawa took all this for granted. These substance-based doting is more like a poison to an ungrateful child.

As Gorky said, "Loving children is something that an old hen does, but to be good at educating them requires talent and all the knowledge of life." ”

3

Highlight your strengths and make each child different

Every child is different, they have their own interests and hobbies, and they also sparkle because of these interests.

In the documentary "Little Boy", 11-year-old Guangzhou primary school student Yin Ran and his bugs became celebrities on the Internet.

Yin Ran said: "They are mini and cute. ”

Mom also thinks that studying insects is a very interesting thing, she will catch insects with Yin Ran and support her son with practical actions.

After all, everyone's personality is different, hobbies and interests are also different, wise parents will judge the child's strengths, help the child find their own interests, and actively guide the child.

Yin Ran has parents who understand him and support him, so that his interests can be protected.

Disney once said, "Interest makes you successful, and I succeed because I do the work that interests me the most." ”

Liu Shusheng is a professor and doctoral supervisor in the Department of Plant Protection, College of Agriculture and Biotechnology, Zhejiang University.

He has loved to play with insects since he was a child, and driven by his interest, he has made a significant contribution to the management of vegetable pests.

In the face of the achievements, Liu Shusheng smiled and said, "I just love to play." ”

Russell said his goal in life was to make "what I love my vocation."

In 2019, Liu Shusheng won the highest honor of entomologist in the world, was elected as a fellow of the American Entomological Society, and no more than ten people are selected each year in the world.

Every child comes to us with hope, so as parents, we should do our best to nurture him, educate him, and fulfill his responsibilities.

Yan Rujing once said in "Strange Story": "A child's life is like a TV series, the child will change slowly, the serial drama can be made up without watching, and the missing part of the child's growth cannot be made up." ”

Let us encourage us to become the guide of our children, give them strength and support, and let them become better selves!