In the building next door to our community, there is a child, in the process of learning, as long as there is an exam, as long as the teacher says that we have a small test recently, or we recently have a midterm exam, a final exam, this child will instantly become very nervous. But on the surface, this child is less likely to feel nervous, but his inner psychological anxiety and behavior have signs of nervousness. So where is this source?
We always think that the child's psychological quality is not good, we always think that the child has no confidence in himself, we always think that the child's ability to resist setbacks is not good, of course, there may be some external reasons. And only if we really want to find the inner reason can we help the child completely solve such a problem, so as to truly protect our child.
So what exactly is causing this child or this type of child to behave like this?
In the process, this little boy has to do some communication with his parents, we will find that his parents in daily life, whether in daily learning, or in daily expression, the little boy's parents almost express when they are: Son, you have to study well, you have to read books well, you have to endorse seriously, you are about to take the exam, you must work hard to study, and what will happen when you take the exam.
In fact, that will invisibly and inadvertently convey some of the anxieties and nervousness that parents have about studying and exams to their children. In fact, the child himself is very good at learning, or his daily state in school. His teachers are very fond of his active interaction and participation in the curriculum. But often, the teacher will also see that the child has only one characteristic, that is, he usually learns very well, but as long as he takes an exam, the final score may not be the result that the parents or teacher want to see, nor the result that the child wants.
So what's the reason? It's because he's not mentally healthy.
And this unhealthy comes from the fact that parents constantly put pressure on him in their daily lives. Tell him that if you look at this question, if you can't, you will have a problem with the exam. Look at you, you can't carry it now! In this way, you will definitely lose money when you take the exam. You see, if you write this assignment, you will definitely suffer a big loss when you take the exam. You see, you are in this state now, you can't even do these two questions, I've told you many times, why don't you still? You're sure you'll lose money on the exam, and that's it, and the child will inexplicably memorize all of his parents' language into his brain.
Parents are the biggest hypnotists for children. If you want your child to become very positive, our parents' language must be positive, we use this hypnosis every day, use this language all day long, or similar language to communicate with the child, in fact, the child will have a feeling of being frightened. It will make the child nervous every time, especially when he is taking an exam, he will call up all the words his parents say to him, and then he will form a TV series that will be constantly looped in his brain.
Think about it, what will be the nervousness of this child when he is in the exam? Why do some children suddenly have fever, headache, nausea, stomach pain, and even constipation on the eve of the exam. In fact, it is directly related to our original family, language communication, so it is recommended that our parents convert the content, tone or way they want to express themselves and become positive.
Imagine if the language of our own parents, which we ourselves receive every day, are oppressive, instructive, and commanding, will we also collapse, let alone our younger children?
Satya, the world's famous "master of family therapy", believes that a person and his original family are inextricably linked, and this connection affects everyone's life. The family of origin is the first and most important relationship in everyone's life. If you are a parent, you are now the original family of your child. The wounds and problems you didn't heal in the past are copied and passed on to your children.
So, don't continue the bad things of the past; the good experiences of the past, pass it on. You are influencing your child's future and the happiness of his/her family. Let's focus on children's mental health together. Start with yourself and become a better parent and a better version of yourself.
Write at the end:
I am seven seven, focus on self and children to grow a win-win situation, pay attention to me, cheer together!