"In September, primary and secondary school students should learn to cook, repair home appliances, etc."!" When I brushed this message at night, I told the truth, as a parent of a primary school student, I had mixed feelings and all kinds of tastes in my heart.
Just today, when I came home from work, my husband, who was busy in the kitchen, said to me with a disdainful face: "You can thank me for not working overtime today, otherwise I won't be able to eat tonight!" ”
As an old mother, my heart was shocked, and I immediately calmed down: "Is this boy forgetting to plug in the power supply again?" ”
"Pull it down! Tell the truth, you don't believe it, create a miracle again! ”
It turned out that the son who came home from school had cooked as usual, but he waited for his husband to come home and see: good guy! The rice was plowed, the water was put in, and the electricity was plugged in, but the lid of the rice cooker was wide open!!!
After listening, the old mother instantly had a black line on her face.
This time, the Ministry of Education officially issued the "Compulsory Education Curriculum Plan", which completely separates labor from the original comprehensive practical activity curriculum, and issued the "Compulsory Education Labor Curriculum Standards (2022 Edition)".
As soon as this big move was released, it immediately jumped on the hot search, causing controversy.
A considerable number of people agree with this provision: it is necessary, it is necessary!
Many parents are very weak-minded: ask their children to cook, grow vegetables, repair home appliances... Too hard, right?
There are also questions: it is possible to increase labor practice classes, and then reduce cultural classes first
At the same time, there are also doubts: there are people who can't cook, but the word "lazy"!
It also points out the specific way to achieve it: the school will first open a housework course and then say
Of course, it also triggered a wave of nostalgia and emotion: I wanted to be...
There is also a wave of warm babies who have long been experts in housework, and these parents have pulled a wave of hatred online
Regarding the benefits of doing housework, Mama Nobo wrote a tweet yesterday about the relationship between housework and children's academic performance and cultivating a sense of responsibility. Interested parents can turn forward.
However, in today's article, Nuo Mama wants to let the child learn to do housework in the real situation, talk about the psychological qualities that parents must have, and summarize it in six words: sweet mouth, blind eyes, and big heart.
[1] The mouth is sweet, and the child needs encouragement
Yes, you read that right, if you want your child to do housework, parents must first have a sweet mouth.
Countless times of practice have proved to me: the "rainbow fart" given by parents to their children is the motivation for children to devote themselves to housework!
For example, lifting heavy objects:
Every time I came back from the supermarket, or every time I came back from my mom's house, it was always a big bag. The car stopped outside the community and carried the heavy object upstairs, which was a "very reluctant" thing for the old mother with thin arms. At this time, I usually praise my son:
"Sure enough, you're better than mom!"
"Yes, it's getting more and more manly!"
Sometimes, my wishful thinking will be overturned by my husband, and he will encourage his son: "Your mother is lazy, you have something for your mother to carry!" ”
However, such provocations usually continue to work after a subsequent round of praise.
"The son is the son, more intimate than the husband, the mother likes you the most!"
It is this series of "rainbow farts" that coaxes his son to rivet enough to carry things.
Parents, do not underestimate the recognition and encouragement of their children, these words of praise, in the ears of children is far more important than we think.
Psychologist William James once proposed that the deepest desire of human nature is to be appreciated by others.
Parents' praise for children is to add sugar to children's lives, children feel sweet, naturally under the dual recognition of parents and self, full of infinite potential, such as - doing housework.
[2] The eyes should be blind, and the child needs to be tolerant
Many children learn not to do housework, and in a way, the parents are too harsh! Evaluate the fruits of children's labor from the perspective of an adult.
It is conceivable that the child cannot reach the perfection in the eyes of the parents, the parents are dissatisfied and picky, and the child loses the confidence and interest in doing housework.
Far from saying, just break the matter of Xiaonuo's classmate "cooking rice".
Cook rice first, then put water, and then steam. This process is very simple, the child's father has taught Xiaonuo several times, we asked ourselves, we have done hand-to-hand teaching.
Occasionally, when we were eating, from time to time, our teeth would hit small stones, and my husband teased: "No, I doubt you have ever fished for rice." ”
"I've shopped for rice!" The child cuts the nail on the head.
Seeing the situation, I comforted my husband: "It's just one or two small stones, inevitable, let me pan for rice, and I may not be able to pick it out." ”
And so, after a while. Once, my mother-in-law came to cook for us at home when school was out. Adhering to the glorious task of "cooking", the son will never allow his grandmother to intervene to cook rice, but when eating, his mother-in-law tells us leisurely: "This child, cooking rice without rice, directly add water to the pot, and he will not listen..."
I chuckled in my heart, and looked at my husband, who couldn't help but teach his son a "cooking" process.
However, the unexpected happened again.
Not long after dinner, when I was cooking, I found that there were all kinds of "groceries" in the rice pot: stones, weeds, broken hair... Pulled for half a day, the whole pot is.
Without him, once again confirmed: the child once again forgot to tao rice!
Before the rice was purchased from the supermarket, it was generally clean, and the children could not see clearly whether they were looking for rice; but this time, because the rice was harvested by the in-laws themselves, there were inevitably some impurities.
This meal, the family is in the process of picking and choosing, barely swallowed.
My husband and I did not lose too many children, and my son did not argue this time, admitting that he was lazy and did not care.
After this time, I don't know if the child has really improved, but he has never eaten his slightly "impurity rice" anyway.
To give this example, without him, I just want to tell parents: if you want to train your children to do housework, parents must tolerate sand in their eyes!
Compared with play, doing housework is a thing that requires children to spend energy but does not have good feelings, children do not care, children do not do well, these conditions are common things. Parents must tolerate their children's imperfections and still encourage their children, so that "doing housework" can become a thing that makes children feel "accustomed", and children can do better and better in practice.
[3] The heart should be big, and the child needs to grow up in making mistakes
"Forget it, it's easier to do it yourself!"
In life, there are many parents who feel frustrated in "letting go" of their children to do housework: they can't believe such a simple thing, and their children can't do it well; they complain even more, "letting go" of their children to do things, and cleaning up the mess is more troublesome.
Here, what Noma wants to tell you is: to train children to do housework, parents must have a big heart.
Which child doesn't grow up making mistakes, including ourselves.
Just like Xiaonuo cooking, it has been nearly a year, but there are still three times out of ten times: either the water is more, or the water is less, or I forgot to check whether the power interface is loose... But in a series of small mistakes, he finally learned the skill of "cooking rice", so that my husband and I could eat a hot meal when we got off work.
Impatient can not eat hot tofu, anxious can not cultivate children's housework skills.
Good parenting, parents should relax their hearts, respect the child's natural growth rhythm, let the child in the mistakes of self-summary, self-improvement.
A little bigger heart, a little slower, one day, you give the trust of the child, the child will return your surprise.
So, in the days to come, my husband and I have re-established new housework skills for Xiaonuo - teaching children to learn to cook, hoping that in the future, in the days of leaving us, children will be able to eat hot and healthy meals with their own ability.
So, what about you? The next step is to cultivate children's housework skills, welcome to leave a message!
I am a Nuo mom, focusing on parent-child growth research, talking about parenting dry goods, writing parenting tips, paying attention to me, growing up together and improving ah~
![One person cooking, the whole family causes cancer? note! Cooking rice with this rice cooker is more harmful than gutter oil![fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)