There is a glass heart, do it

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Text/Guan see Anchor/Zhang Bin

In the 90s of last century, there was a song called "Glass Heart", which was a love song, Qi Qin composed lyrics and music, the theme is to let everyone cherish the lover, do not easily break the lover's heart.

In the Internet age, "glass heart" has a new meaning.

What is a "glass heart"?

It means that the psychological quality is poor, the mind is as fragile as glass, it is very fragile, and it cannot withstand criticism and accusation.

Many teachers and parents told me that many children now have a "glass heart".

They are too sensitive, too concerned about other people's evaluations, and extremely vulnerable.

Too glassy, obviously not suitable.

Today, we're going to talk about this topic.

First of all, how the glass heart is cultivated.

Some children's glass hearts are "held" out.

On the one hand, they usually encounter too few rejections at home, thus forming the perception of themselves as the center.

When they enter school, children find that they are not the center of the world, it is difficult to accept this fact, it is easy to show vulnerability, there is no psychological tenacity.

On the other hand, children usually receive too much praise.

There is a saying in pedagogy that excellent children are exaggerated.

Although there is some truth in this statement, when and how to boast? To what extent it is exaggerated, it is a question.

Many parents often praise their children very pompous, and often praise everything, this kind of praise makes the child feel that the world is his most cattle, once he realizes that many people are actually better than him, he can not accept.

For example, many mothers often say, "You're the best!" ”

Such praise is very problematic, because in fact, children cannot be the best in all aspects, even if they are the best for the time being, there may be someone better than you in the future.

Children need to praise, but praise must be sincere and realistic, otherwise it may be counterproductive.

Some children's glass hearts stem from the high expectations of their parents

Most parents have expectations for their children, which is normal, but once the expectations are too high, there is a problem.

If the expectations are too high, there will be a gap, parents can't stand it, and children can't stand it.

Especially those excellent children, because of the expectations of their parents, so they themselves have extremely high expectations of themselves, especially afraid of failing to live up to their parents' expectations.

Because of the fear of being disappointed, they are more vulnerable, and some children simply give up and refuse to challenge difficult things in order to avoid the disappointment of their parents.

Specifically, it is manifested in the inability to lose.

The child's glass heart may also be a personality

If your child has a glass heart, it is not necessarily because of the above two reasons, but also because of personality.

This personality may be innate, genetically inherited, or mutated.

Some people, who are inherently sensitive, are more concerned about their surroundings than the average person and are indecisive. On the other hand, some people will not pay attention to too many details, and will appear to be decisive.

It is difficult to say who is good and who is bad of these two personalities, in my opinion, personality does not matter whether it is good or bad, he is just a characteristic of one person.

Sensitive people, for example, are more compassionate and creative, they are cautious and make fewer mistakes, but they become overwhelmed when faced with complex situations.

Along with this trait, it is particularly concerned about the words and deeds of others and the surrounding environment, because it is too concerned about other people's opinions, so its own emotions also rise and fall, and the phenomenon of glass heart will appear.

For example, some children will become depressed because their classmates do not play with themselves, because of the child's unintentional words, or because of a look from their parents.

They will unconsciously magnify and aggravate small things, and their hearts will be more likely to be hurt, and the result will become a glass heart.

In real life, parents need to pay attention to such a phenomenon, if the child has such a tendency, parents appropriate guidance, timely appeasement, but remember, do not label the child "glass heart", otherwise it will really become a glass heart.

Correct self-awareness and the correct evaluation of others are not only what children have to learn, but also what many adults need to improve.

Adults can do a good job in order to guide children.

When a child feels hurt by someone else's words and deeds, parents can help him analyze:

Are other people's words and deeds reasonable? Is this really the case? What can we do next?

Such an analysis can effectively help the child to know what kind of evaluation is reasonable, what kind of rejection is OK, and what kind of speech can be ignored.

The more "glass heart" children, the more they need their parents to have a "normal heart".

Personal opinions do not represent any institution

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