Education is nothing more than four "three-character classics"

★ One original article a day, today is the 1800th day

《Pipe Reference》

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Text/Guan see Anchor/Zhang Bin

Today, it is the 1800th day that I and Teacher Zhang Bin and Yu Wei have done "Pipe See Reference", and it has been almost five years in a flash.

Readers who are familiar with me know that there are usually four pieces of content in my public account, namely family education, food culture, historical stories and news reviews.

Relatively speaking, news commentary is the easiest to write, because it is enough to illustrate the point of view based on the news facts.

The most difficult to write is family education, because family education is "different from person to person and time to event", can not be one-size-fits-all, some articles may have universal significance, but implemented to specific individuals, but also have to be taught according to their aptitudes, otherwise it will become "originalism".

Simply put, educating a 3-year-old is not the same as educating an 18-year-old.

Every stage of growth should have different educational concepts and methods.

Human growth is usually divided into five stages, infant, adolescence, adolescence, adulthood, and old age.

In my opinion, the education of early childhood and old age is very similar, commonly known as "old children", and usually no longer need to carry out family education, can be summarized together, so I will analyze the following four stages.

First, in infancy (0-6 years old), the three-character sutra of education should be called "hand in hand".

During the period of 0 to 6 years old, the child will form the background color of life, that is, the child's basic feeling of the world, whether it is a cool color or a warm color, whether it is trust or doubt.

At this stage, parents are best not to stay away from their children, they should teach their children hand in hand, "hand in hand" not only teach life skills and cultural knowledge, but more importantly, help children establish feelings about the world, especially good feelings, especially to establish a good parent-child relationship.

Psychology tells us that if a person has a bad relationship with his parents, it is easy to feel inferior in other interpersonal relationships, because he will think: "My parents do not think I am good, how can others think I am good?" ”

The biggest task of teaching children by hand is to establish a positive affirmation of the child's self, let him know that he is loved by his parents and relatives and friends, in order to have confidence in himself and have the confidence to face the external environment.

Second, in the childhood period (6 to 16 years old), the three-character sutra at this stage is "take him away".

Children at this stage, just in the primary and junior high school stages, the ability to imitate is particularly strong, whether good or bad, they will imitate, so how to avoid letting children fall into the wrong cycle? As a parent, we must be the one who "takes him away", take him to the right path, take him to the right way, take him to develop good habits, and take him to develop good character.

How to bring it?

In my opinion, in addition to establishing rules and regulations, the more critical thing is undoubtedly that personal transmission is more important than words.

Because what can really affect children is not empty truths, but the behavior of adults.

In other words, what really affects children is not what the parents say, but what they do.

The power of role models does not mean that parents must accompany children in whatever they do, but that parents need to set an example in their own life trajectory.

If you want your child not to gamble, don't rub mahjong yourself, if you want your child to have good grades, you must also love to learn, if you want your child not to be addicted to games, you don't hold your mobile phone all day long.

Third, adolescence (16-23 years old), the three-character sutra at this stage is "let go of the hand".

This stage usually refers to high school to college graduation.

Adolescence has two characteristics, one is extremely creative, and the other is that it is very easy to rebel, which is an important stage of a person's development.

They begin to be curious about many things, prefer to be with their friends, and begin to feel that their parents are annoying and childish.

At this stage, parents should begin to learn to let go of their hands and realize that although the child is still your child, he is an independent individual.

The task of letting go of the hand is to help the child grow up, cultivate the child's ability to live independently, let him break through, go to see, try, go and walk, and live out himself.

Fourth, in adulthood (after graduating from college and entering society), the three-character sutra at this stage should be "watch him go".

There is once a famous essay that reads: "I slowly and slowly learned that the so-called father-daughter mother-son relationship only means that your fate with him is that you are constantly watching his back drift away in this life and this life." You stand at this end of the path, watching him fade away into the bend of the path, and he silently tells you with his back: no need to chase. ”

If all other love points to intimacy, then only the love of parents for their children ultimately points to separation.

If a child no longer needs parents so much after he becomes an adult, but he is still willing to talk to his parents, chat, take a walk together, and walk together to do something, then such parents are most likely successful.

Education is nothing more than these four "three-character sutras"!

Personal opinions do not represent any institution

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