In "Heart Residence", Zhan Xiang is really good to Gu Qingyu. After Gu Qingyu got married, Zhan Xiang saw that she was unhappy and would secretly observe her in a corner of the community every day. Feng Xiaoqin asked him, do you want her to divorce, or do you want her to be happy with Shi Yuan? He replied: Although I like her, I see that she is happier than I am.
Why didn't such a person who loved him so much did he chase gu Qingyu? Is it really just because Zhan Xiang has no culture? Of course not, there is a description in the original work, Gu Qingyu was sad and drank with Zhan Xiang, I don't know if it is the role of alcohol or how, Gu Qingyu kissed Zhan Xiang on the face, and Zhan Xiang was just stunned, and did not respond with a kiss, and afterwards Zhan Xiang also regretted not seizing the opportunity. However, this move just revealed the truth that he could not catch up with Gu Qingyu.
1. He held Gu Qingyu too high
In recent years, a popular Internet word called "licking the dog" is often used to describe the relationship life knowing that the other party does not like themselves, but also repeatedly and bottomlessly pleasing each other. The end of "licking the dog" is generally a failure.
We use this word to describe Zhan Xiang, which seems a little inappropriate. But in fact, that's what he did.
8 years ago, he went to the community where Gu Qingyu lived to see the house, just happened to meet Gu Qingyu and his father downstairs, on this side, he fell deeply in love with Gu Qingyu, and immediately bought the house in this community, just to be closer to Gu Qingyu.
In order to get close to Gu Qingyu, he has always courted the Gu family. For example, to introduce Gu Lei to the object; for example, after Gu Shihong was bullied by Boss Shi, he immediately bought a water army to say good things for Gu Shihong... Even in order to make a good impression on them, they were very good to Guo Qiang, a neighbor.
He was not to mention Gu Qingyu. As soon as he appeared on the scene, he deliberately ran to her company to celebrate her birthday; Gu Qingyu said a word, he was busy for Gu Xin's wedding; even for Gu Qingyu's happiness, he personally matched her and Shi Yuan... Seeing that Gu Qingyu was not happy, he deliberately knocked Shi Yuan. Later, Gu Qingyu separated from Shi Yuan. In order to help Gu Qingyu hide from his father, he also went to the aftermath.
Gu Qingyu was not happy, and shi Yuan'an accompanied him before and after.
This is not a "top licking dog"!
That night, the reason why he did not dare to kiss Gu Qingyu back was because he had always offered her as a goddess, thinking that he would "defile" her sacred image.
Such a mentality doomed him to be impossible to catch up with Gu Qingyu. Even if they catch up, their marriage will not be happy.
2, he will not "use means"
In love, there is a means called "wanting to catch the old", this means is used well, basically can achieve their own goals.
In "Heart Residence", Gu Qingyu used this means to make Shi Yuan propose to her. Gu Qingyu himself went to propose to Shi Yuan and was rejected, and then he was not reconciled and asked Zhan Xiang to help him. The three of them just had a meal at once, Gu Qingyu deliberately walked close to Zhan Xiang, acting very intimate, Shi Yuan was really jealous, and then proposed with a piano song.
You see, this trick still works.
Zhan Xiang really loved Gu Qingyu too much, and loved her so much that he was reluctant to "use means" against her.
Zhan Xiang was very good to Gu Qingyu at the beginning, if he suddenly played a disappearance after letting Gu Qingyu adapt to his good, or deliberately got closer to others and stimulated Gu Qingyu, maybe he could successfully catch up with her.
In love, the means should be used, and if it is used well, it is not called a heart machine, but a "flirting".
In fact, before Gu Qingyu married Shi Yuan, Gu Qingyu had several impulses to agree to Zhan Xiang, but unfortunately he failed to seize the opportunity. For example, when Gu Qingyu asked him to help Gu Xin, at that time, Gu Qingyu's tone of voice talking to her father already implied that she wanted to accept Zhan Xiang.
Unfortunately, at these critical times, Zhan Xiang did not "add a little strength", so he could only watch Gu Qingyu marry Shi Yuan.
3) He made it his habit to love her
Chasing a person for too long is not good, because you make it your habit to chase her, then you are used to not catching up with him.
Just like Zhan Xiang, he pursued Gu Qingyu for eight years, and regarded the pursuit of Gu Qingyu as a habit, and he regarded this mentality of not catching up as a habit. Still that kiss back thing, he decided in his heart that Gu Qingyu would not like himself, so he did not dare to take the initiative. Sometimes, whether the relationship between two people can undergo "qualitative" changes depends on whether there is a "breakthrough" in these critical moments.
Zhan Xiang chased Gu Qingyu for eight years, don't look at him has been working hard, but in his subconscious, he has long known that he will not be able to catch up with Gu Qingyu in this life. He was just waiting for the moment when he would die. However, Gu Qingyu didn't let him die, so his heart has been up and down, and he doesn't know what to do.
In real life, girls must not promise boys who chase themselves for too long. Because once people have attachments, they will be disappointed after they get it, and this disappointment will make each other very painful.
Just like Gu Qingyu, she has loved Shi Yuan for so many years, after marrying him, does she cherish it? Not yet disgusted.
Love, in itself, is a throbbing. If you love him, then you have to pursue it with a bang, and if you can't catch up, then decisively let go. Keep pursuing, and will not get good results.
What do you think?