"Why didn't my son kiss me anymore?"
"My son had a hot conversation with his father, but he had nothing to say to me?"
"Why is my son often impatient with me?"
As the child grows bigger and bigger, many mothers will issue similar exclamations, I don't know when to start, when I was a child, the "sticky essence" that chased after the ass, the distance is getting farther and farther away, especially when it comes to adolescence, the relationship between parents and children will become tense, and even "the same water and fire".
In fact, due to the innate personality characteristics, boys are more difficult to control than girls, if the mother ignores the psychological changes of her son and adopts the "self-righteous" education method, it is naturally difficult to establish a healthy parent-child relationship.
In other words, the more the son grows up and the more estranged from the mother, it is often the mother's education method that goes wrong, and if we want to have a more "iron" relationship with the son, we must master the right method.
Love and companionship are the cornerstones of a child's healthy growth
I have brushed such a short video before, a 4-year-old boy sat at the dinner table, watching his father and grandmother around the crying sister, full of loneliness and grievances.
The neglect of the parents made the little boy angry, and the small hand was thrown away, revealing the most authentic reaction.
In life, some parents will think that little boys should be born "rough", occasionally "exercise and exercise", which is more conducive to the growth of children, inadvertently ignoring the feelings of their sons.
In fact, both boys and girls, before the age of 6 are in the "psychological sensitivity period", at this time they are more eager for the mother's attention, love and companionship, if the mother in the early care of the child is missing, it is easy to cut off the intimacy between each other, even if you grow up and work harder, it is difficult to establish a strong parent-child relationship.
So don't look at sometimes the little boy is grinning, it doesn't matter to everything, in fact, there are also strong emotional needs, we must respond in time when we get along with the child, give the child enough love and companionship, in order to build a bridge of love between each other.
Respect and understand children in order to become "friends"
The day before yesterday, I brushed such a problem on a certain hu, and there was a bao mom who asked for help from netizens, saying that her son was addicted to Ultraman cards and mini world games, and after being stopped, he actually began to draw game pictures, worried that such a "plaything" would destroy the child.
After the question, the mother posted a picture drawn by her son, indicating that there were many similar pictures at home.
However, when they saw this picture, netizens stood on the side of the child, and some people even said, "To be honest, I was very touched to see this picture."
It turns out that the child's painting seems to be smeared by hand, but it is actually a very creative and comprehensive position composition, and you can feel that he has spent a lot of thought on it.
However, in the eyes of mothers, such hobbies of children are equivalent to "playthings losing their minds", and continuing to continue will be "ruined".
In the process of children's growth, it is inevitable that there will be a variety of hobbies, and many "Chinese-style parents" will be difficult to understand, choose to suppress and control, and hope to use the "authority" of parents to get their children back on track.
But the child is not a "puppet", if the parents can not give respect and understanding, just blindly angry, restrained, will only make the parent-child relationship more and more rigid, and even make the child have a rebellious psychology, the stricter the discipline, the more rebellious.
The American writer Emerson Agridge once said, "If you can only give your son one thing, give him respect." ”
So when the son has some "strange" ideas, we may as well try to give him affirmation, with understanding and respect to become a real "friend" with the child.
Know how to let go, the parent-child relationship will be more intimate
In order to give their children a bright future, some parents will be keen to pave all the roads in advance, interfere with all their children's choices, and become the so-called "helicopter parents", who have been "circling" over their children, monitoring and controlling their every move.
When Yi Nengjing participated in a variety show, she mentioned that she hoped that her son would learn to write a screenplay, but her son had a special love for editing, so the mother and son quarreled for the first time.
The son yelled at Yi Nengjing, "How do you know, all you know is all?" I know what you don't know, and I haven't been to my future! ”
Every child has a wild imagination of the future, parents think that they are "for the good of their children", and nagging their children bitterly will often only attract the other party's disgust and make the parent-child relationship deadlocked.
In the face of the child's day-to-day growth, we can try to let go appropriately, do not have to use the right method to interfere with the child, at this time to give the child the greatest understanding and support, do a good job of "logistical support", is the due meaning of parenthood, parent-child relationship can be more intimate.
Old Miao Conclusion:
Many boys will prefer to get along with their fathers when they grow up, and as an old mother, they will inevitably be "sad and sad".
In fact, as long as the mother pays attention to the way of educating the child, the relationship between mother and child can also be very close, and doing the above 3 things well is the key to maintaining the parent-child relationship.
Today's Topic: How do you get along with your children?
I am Lao Miao, a super grandfather after the 80s, and the most eye-catching male head nurse in the hospital, welcome to discuss the issue of pregnancy together, and please pay attention to Lao Miao.