It is said that after marriage, the couple forms a new family and begins an independent life, but many couples cannot be separated from their parents, because of the pressure of contemporary society, and women have become independent in the workplace, many young couples have their own jobs, so children need to be handed over to the elderly to bring. I believe that everyone has experienced that most of the main forces in the ranks with babies are grandmothers, and when asked what the children's grandmothers do, most of them will get the answer of "she has something to be busy", in fact, are the grandmothers really so busy?
I don't believe that the mother-in-law can take a good baby, it has always been managed by the child's grandmother, the two old people met, the mother-in-law was excited and tearful, "I'm okay, I want to take the baby"
Xiao Fan, who lives in Shandong, is the only daughter of the family, from childhood her parents only have one child, everything is very good for her to take care of her, after marriage, her parents are married to a nearby house, Xiao Fan also often lives in this house, in order to be closer to her mother.
After the birth of the child, Xiao Fan discussed with her mother to be taken by her, because after marriage, she rarely got along with her mother-in-law, and there was also a kind of alienation and distrust of her mother-in-law, so until the child went to kindergarten, she followed her grandmother.
Sometimes the mother-in-law proposes to pick up the child to go to her place, xiaofan will very clearly refuse, saying that the child is very good to follow the grandmother, so that the mother-in-law should be busy with what she does not have to worry about the child. Occasionally once Xiao Fan's mother took the child out to play, met the child's grandmother on the way, the two old people chatted when they met, Xiao Fan's mother-in-law looked at the child who was not close to herself at all, and the tears were going to come out, she said that she had retired usually had nothing to do, she wanted to take the child but Xiao Fan was not at ease, she really wanted the child to think every day and couldn't stand it.
Listening to the words of the child's grandmother, Xiao Fan's mother also deeply understood, she said that Xiao Fan this child is more willful from childhood, she must do what she believes, in fact, people around are also very curious about why the child's grandmother does not bring children, Xiao Fan said that it is because the grandmother is busy and has no time, since they met today, they will go back to Xiao Fan and let her take the child to the grandmother's house.
In fact, there are many practical reasons hidden behind the busyness of grandma on the job, why doesn't Grandma bring a baby? We still have to think about it from many aspects.
On the one hand, there are indeed some grandmothers who have tasted the hardships of bringing up their babies, so they feel that it is difficult to raise their children but still have to take care of their grandchildren, which makes them more difficult to accept, and naturally they are not willing to bring them again. And the grandmothers will be more distressed about their daughters and sons-in-law, worried that they are too tired, they will take the initiative to help with the baby.
We often say that the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is an ancient proposition, and indeed some mother-in-law is more cunning and always has opinions on daughters-in-law, and this opinion will also be transmitted to children in the process of taking the baby. Teach them to disrespect their mothers and stir up the relationship between mother and son. And grandma and the child said more about the mother's good, naturally the mother is more willing to give the child to the grandmother to bring.
There is also a problem of communication, grandma will be more from the perspective of the mother to consider the problem, but also more able to accept some of their daughter's suggestions and opinions on themselves, because the contradictions caused by the baby will be less. However, because grandma and her daughter-in-law are always like a layer apart, sometimes the opinions they put forward are often distorted by them, and there will be many differences in the process of taking the baby, which eventually leads to mutual unhappiness.
This is caused by the child's grandmother herself, this situation does require the grandmother to fight, but the fact is not limited to this, in addition to the mother's reasons in this regard is also the key.
The tradition of our country is that the woman lives with the man after marriage, but for more than 20 years, different living environments and lifestyles and ways of speaking have intensified the problems between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Many mothers have a certain prejudice against their mother-in-law, which makes them not see the slightest goodness of their mother-in-law in their eyes, and naturally they are not willing to bring her children with them, and even do not want their children to be close to her.
There are also many mothers who will over-interpret some of the words of the mother-in-law or do certain things, perhaps all this is not a big deal to do by the child's grandmother, but it is not okay to go to the child's grandmother, and she is too lazy to communicate with the mother-in-law, so she gives the child to the grandmother, and others say that the mother-in-law is busy and has no time to bring, and many contradictions are transferred to the mother-in-law, which is also a big situation.
Today's society has been opened to such an extent, the concept in people's minds has long been different from the past, those so-called evil mothers-in-law are actually very few, and even some mothers still need to find some mother-in-law's good, do not be affected by some poisonous chicken soup.
Whether it is a grandmother with a baby or a grandmother with a baby, in fact, their love for the child is the same, and the mother should not be too hostile to which party does not trust which party, maintain the integrity of the three views, and use her heart to discover everyone's goodness to herself and the goodness to the child, so that the grandmother can also participate in the ranks of the baby.