The work of parents plays a vital role in children's adaptation to kindergarten life. In the process of children entering the kindergarten, many of our parents and friends are often at a loss, their starting point is for the children to be able to adapt smoothly, but the result is counterproductive, playing the opposite role. Thirteen taboos for new students to understand:
A taboo: blindly compromise, can not send today, send tomorrow
This is the most common problem for new kindergarten students to enter the kindergarten at present. Parents are crying because of their distress and blindly postpone the time to go to kindergarten. The child cried, and the parents were very distressed. There is still a fluke mentality: maybe tomorrow, he can happily go to kindergarten! This will make the child feel that as long as he insists, he may not have to go to the kindergarten, so when you send the kindergarten again, the child's crying will become more intense.
Second taboo: send two days, rest for one day
When some children first enter the kindergarten, the crying is more serious, and they do not eat as much as at home, which is easy to catch fire. Parents feel very distressed, so they want to send a few days, rest at home for a day, to give their children conditioning. In fact, there is a misunderstanding in such an idea, when the child rests at home for a day, it will feel more strange to come back to the kindergarten, especially for the new children, who have not yet established an attachment relationship with the teacher, and sending and stopping will make the child's adaptation process more effective. Insisting on sending children to kindergarten is crucial to the child's adaptation.
Three taboos: Children cry, I cry
The first time I left my baby, I saw my baby crying badly, and the parents' heartache was also being cleaned up. However, the emotional infection of parents to their children is too strong, this kind of parents accompanying their children to cry is commonplace in the reception of new students in kindergartens, causing children to mistakenly think that parents do not want them, so that they think that going to kindergarten is a very painful thing for themselves or parents, exacerbating the child's separation focus, which is not conducive to the child's adaptation.
Four Taboos: "I'm waiting for you outside!" "I'll go get you a sweater!"
In the process of sending the grandparents to the kindergarten, this situation often occurs, the child has one mouth to cry, and immediately says to the child: "I will not leave, Grandma is waiting for you outside Ha!" "Grandma's going to buy you milk, and that's coming back!" This statement may be valid for the time being, but when the child finds out that he has been deceived, he will feel very uneasy because he does not know where his grandmother has gone, which makes them feel insecure.
Five taboos: "Don't cry, I'll be the first to pick you up!" ”
Many parents will promise their children this way, when the child cries and says to you, "Mommy will be the first to pick me up!" "Can you bear to reject your child?" So many parents casually promised: "Well, Mom will be the first to pick you up!" "If you can do it, of course we are not against this way, but so many parents, can you guarantee that you are the first?" If not, please do not respond to the child in this way, please respond to the child in a different way: "Mom will come to pick you up early!" "Mommy will pick you up at four!" If the easy promise is not fulfilled, it is easy for the child to feel that the parent's words do not count, then the parent's prestige in the child's heart is greatly reduced. And once the child knows that his parents have deceived him, he will reason about something else, so will the parents come to pick him up? The child is not sure.
Six taboos: "Cry again, cry again, I won't pick you up!" ”
This is an urgent word in the head of parents, but our front-line teachers often hear it. Parents say this in order to make the child stop crying, but the child often cries more and more severely. Why? Because the child's comprehension ability is limited, the child understands that you do not come to pick him up, this negative effect will make the child feel fear, fear of kindergarten, fear of the teacher, more fear of separation anxiety.
Seven taboos: "The child is crying, I will stay with the child for a while!" ”
Many parents come with such a mentality, they feel that as long as they stay with their children for a while, they will be able to say goodbye to their parents happily. However, it often backfires. Staying longer for parents will only lengthen the child's adaptation time and make the child's crying and separation anxiety time longer. Because at this time, the child has realized that the parents may go, and separation anxiety has arisen, and he begins to cry. After all, the parents have to leave, that is, the child still has to face it alone, trying to adapt.
Eight taboos: "Don't cry!" ”
It is true that every parent does not want to hear their children crying, even if they are gone, they can't hear it, and their hearts can accept it, but they really can't accept their children shedding tears in front of their eyes. In fact, in the face of separation anxiety, the child chooses to cry to vent his feelings, which is the child's normal way of expression, suppressing the child's crying, and forcing the child not to cry by coercive means, which is not conducive to the child's psychological growth.
Nine taboos: After feeding and leaving
Some parents are afraid that their children will not have enough to eat, and they always want to feed their children in the morning before leaving. However, after the child is full and then say goodbye to the parents, it is easy to vomit because of crying, and the parents stay in the activity room for a long time, which will cause other children to have emotional infections, which is not conducive to the child's adaptation.
Ten taboos: Take a look outside the window
After parents send their children, it is inevitable that they will not be at ease, so some parents lie outside the window to see if the children can adapt, but if the children find out, the children's crying will become more intense.
Eleventh Taboo: "Did a child beat you?" "Did the teacher kill you?"
Parents' concern for their children is overflowing with words, but we must know that such negative hints will only make children more afraid of kindergarten life, and unconsciously establish associations such as kindergarten is not good, children beat me, teachers kill me and so on. Of course, this is not conducive to the healthy development of children, we can ask children like this: "Which child do you know today?" "Did the teacher praise you?" Help young children recall the good times of kindergarten day and build good feelings for kindergarten.
Twelve taboos: at home must be well made up
Children have to enter the kindergarten for the first few days, and they generally eat less than when they are at home, so some parents will deliberately bring milk to their children when they eat at night, and they also want to make more fish, shrimp, meat and eggs to supplement their children's nutrition. In fact, children just enter the kindergarten is easy to catch fire, in the meal should pay attention to more drinking water, eat more light food, and for fish and meat and other things that are easy to produce phlegm on fire, should try to eat less, eat more vegetables, is conducive to the improvement of children's immunity.
Thirteen taboos: Unrestrained when resting
It's hard to look forward to Saturday, Sunday, play with your children, and relax! So we see that many children are particularly difficult to adapt to on Monday, on the one hand, because they have rested for two days and are unfamiliar with the environment, and on the other hand, because the children's work and rest rules are inconsistent with the kindergarten, which leads to disorderly work and rest. On rest days, parents should try their best to cooperate with the kindergarten's work and rest time to help their children form a regular schedule. 3 to 5 years old is a critical period for the development of children's sense of order, and developing regular work and rest habits will benefit children for a lifetime.
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