1, Tanabata day, the husband returned early from a business trip, just arrived at the door, heard the voice of a man in the bedroom, very angry, and rushed into the bedroom in a panic. I saw my wife alone with a big head

1, Tanabata day, the husband returned early from a business trip, just arrived at the door, heard the voice of a man in the bedroom, very angry, and rushed into the bedroom in a panic. Seeing his wife sitting on the bed alone in sweat, the husband asked angrily: What about people! The wife replied breathlessly: Say... Say what, how can there be other people in this room. The husband's bedroom, living room, kitchen, under the bed, wardrobe are all looked for again, and sure enough, a figure was found on the bed table, the husband kicked down, and the wife came in later and said, "Hey, where did the master who repaired the air conditioner go?"

2. I met a particularly bold female netizen, and last night she pulled me to the cinema to watch "The Old Corpse of the Mountain Village". When I came back, after a psychiatric hospital that had fallen into disrepair, I wanted to scare female netizens. So I pointed to the hospital door and said, "Did you see the woman in white?" The female netizen tensed up and said: "Is what my grandmother said true?" I was a little frightened and asked, "What did your grandmother say?" Female netizen: "Dogs can see things that humans can't see!" ”?

3. After eating, talk to the husband according to the custom. The old man: "The economy has been sluggish in recent years, and it is not easy to do anything!" Are your banks affected? Me: "Of course, the business volume is significantly smaller, and it is not as large as the transaction volume in previous years!" The old man: "Then are your salary bonuses affected?" Me: "They must have been affected, but I didn't!" The old man: "How can you be an exception?" Me: "Their establishment is in the bank, my establishment is in the cleaning company!" ”

4. My sister-in-law opened an Internet café and invested four million. Because I know my cousin very well, I recharged my ID card with 1 million yuan of Internet fees. I have nothing to do after work and will come to the internet, every time I swipe the card: ding! The card was successful, and the remaining 979,950 yuan was left. Every time the cashier's sister sees me, she is full of little stars! Until one day. That pretty front desk girl was my sister-in-law's cousin.

5. My cousin bought a wild carp for my husband in Weishan Lake, because my cousin said that her father liked to eat fish. When the cousin carried the fish to the cousin's house, just opened the door, the cousin's face was green. Entering the house, looking at the oversized aquarium, my cousin was not calm in an instant! I heard that my future father-in-law packed the aquarium in the morning and waited for my fish! The cousin said with grievance, "Old man, if you can count what I owe you, I will definitely make up for it when I come back!" ”

6. Colleagues suddenly received a notice yesterday saying that they had been dismissed from their jobs. He rushed to see the head of the human resources department and said: "I have been working in the company for so long, now let me go, at least give me a letter of recommendation, let me find a job!" The supervisor nodded and immediately wrote him a letter of recommendation. He took a look at it and saw that it said, "This man has been working in our company for ten years, and when he left, we were all satisfied." ”?

7. The unit should carry out personnel transfer, and the leader sent a female director to our department. She looked harmless, delicate and weak, and many male colleagues wanted to bully her. Everyone had gone to dinner that morning, and I had no intention of bumping into the female director alone in her office. Then I saw her directly pick up the electric kettle, the spout of the pot forked at her waist and drink heroically, after drinking she found that I stayed at the door. The female director's face instantly turned red, and after looking at me for half a minute, she stuttered: Shuo is such a man!

8. When I first fell in love with my daughter-in-law, I went to my daughter-in-law's house one night, and my daughter-in-law didn't want it. As a result, the finger was caught in the door, and the clamp was unbearable. I stubbornly did not draw my hands, squeezed inside, and my eyes were quite determined! Now in order to run out to play at night, the daughter-in-law will not let her, and after the front foot goes out, the foot is caught by the daughter-in-law with the door, and the mouth is full of mud. I climbed out, my eyes full of longing for freedom...

9. My sister has been the treasure in the palm of the family since she was a child, and she has been pampered by various kinds of things at home, and her temper is particularly bad. When I was a child, once she provoked me to annoy me, and the two of us fought, and as a result, I didn't understand things, didn't control my strength, and cried to my sister. Dad came over to give me a slap after work: you are the eldest brother, can't you let her order, she is younger than you! I cried and said: I let her do three tricks! But she still can't beat it! I remember being chased and beaten by my father: Little bunny cub, I let you three moves, come, I let you three moves!

10. My wife is a nurse who is responsible for giving injections to patients in the hospital. Once a young man came, he had a fever to hang up a little drip, and his wife was very sharp and got it for him. The young man said: Auntie, you are so powerful, before others had to beat me a few times before. The wife pulled out the needle at once, and the young man shivered in pain. The boy said: What are you doing? The wife said lightly: It's okay, just bent.

11. A programmer who has worked for 5 years in a company likes the female director of his department! After a drink, the programmer had the courage to boldly confess to the female supervisor! Rejected, the programmer confessed to the female supervisor every time he was drunk. The female supervisor rejected the programmer 99 times, and the brother confessed a hundred times: "I love you, promise me okay?" The female supervisor was moved to tears: "I promised you!" The programmer "snapped" a big mouth and slapped it over, and it was so difficult to make a whole thing.

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #