1. One day the husband was drunk and returned late, the wife had a plan, wanted to test whether he had an affair, so he put on lipstick and deliberately kissed her husband's clothes! The next day, the husband woke up drunk, wife

1. One day the husband was drunk and returned late, the wife had a plan, wanted to test whether he had an affair, so he put on lipstick and deliberately kissed her husband's clothes! The next day, the husband woke up drunk, and the wife was angry: What were you doing outside last night, you look at this lipstick mark! Husband looked at it and laughed! Wife: You made a mistake and laughed! Husband: Wife, don't be funny, such a big lipstick mark, who else but you has such a big mouth!

2. Go back to your hometown with your boyfriend, at the mouth of the village, the boyfriend is urinating urgently, it is convenient to go to the grove, I am waiting on the side of the road, there is a grandfather coming, the uncle asked me: "Girl, who are you looking for in our village?" Me: "Uncle, I'll go to Li Xiaodong's house!" Just then, my boyfriend came out and I said to him, "Did this uncle say anything about your village?" Boyfriend: "This grandson who does not know, my neighbor" I tugged on the boyfriend's clothes to make him speak more politely, and the uncle next to him saw the boyfriend and greeted him happily: "Second grandfather, you are back?" I, depend, the rural generations are really chaotic...

3. Once upon a time, there was a man who always wanted to turn himself into a woman. On this day the man happened to meet God, and the man said: God, in the next life I want to become a woman, can you fulfill my wish? God asks: Why? Men say: I have been tortured by women in my life, and I will be tortured by women in the next life! God: Well, I promise you. As a result, the man was so sad that he became a woman, and he asked God: God, why did you turn me into a flower? God said: Then you will be able to scare men to death!

4. My cousin has loved to keep pets since she was a child, which is not recently a talking parrot. One day my cousin was going out to watch a movie with her boyfriend, and my cousin took a shower in the bathroom and got dressed up. There was no one else in the house, and when my cousin was taking a bath, she didn't close the door, and this was the parrot shouting: I see, I see. The cousin angrily said to the parrot: Little thing, if you call me again, I will pluck out your hair! The next day, the air conditioner in my cousin's house broke, so I asked a repairman to repair it, and this repairman was a balding uncle, and the little parrot shouted again: Did you see it too?

6. I heard that the group was going to come to check, the company was nervous, and the manager said that he must be respectful to the people who came above. The person who came was a little girl in her early 20s, I was more handsome, so I was in charge of the reception, and when I met, I was nervous and said: "Aunt, good!" The little girl was stunned for a moment and said, "Good time!" "Just because of this simple conversation, later we fell in love, and when we took it home to meet our parents, the two adults originally knew each other, and there were distant relatives, on the basis of generations, she was indeed my aunt." On the day of the breakup, she said: "Don't be sad, I always felt that I should be good with Guo Xiang..." Hey, this woman is really ruthless!

7. It has been almost two years since the father-in-law's death, and the mother-in-law finally can't bear the loneliness and remarrys the father-in-law's single brother. As a result, shortly after marriage, the 56-year-old mother-in-law suddenly became pregnant with her second child. My husband and I were very curious and asked my mother-in-law why she suddenly wanted to have children. My mother-in-law said: Alas, mainly because my colleagues around me have a second child one by one! Me: And then you moved your heart too? The mother-in-law said: No, I am mainly red-eyed for those months of maternity leave!

2. 8. The company's original cleaning aunt had a long vacation at home, and recently colleagues took turns to do hygiene. It just so happens that my mother has been looking for a job lately, and I thought I could arrange it. I went to the manager and said: Why not let my mother clean up, anyway, my mother has nothing to do at home. After the manager listened, he suddenly became angry and said angrily: Do you think my mother is not clean?

9. When a male colleague and a female colleague joke and fight, the man accidentally sprays perfume into the woman's eyes, and the woman's eyes are blindfolded and painful. The man comforted: "It's okay, blind I raised you for a lifetime!" It just so happened that the man's girlfriend came to wait for him to leave work and heard it at the door. The man turned his head to see his girlfriend, his expression stiffened, and immediately pulled the female colleague to the girlfriend and said, "Come, call Mom!" ”

10. The son is in junior high school this year, and his academic performance has not been up or down, and this exam is still hovering in the middle. But it turned out that a classmate who was similar to him actually entered the top five, and I asked him what was wrong? My son told me: "That guy recently fell in love, and got along with the 'first sister' in our class, I thought that his grades would definitely decline, but I didn't expect ah, I didn't expect that the purpose of his object was to let the family tutor him with his homework, so this time..." I quickly interrupted him: "Your boy told me such an inspirational love story, it won't be something in his heart, right?" ”

2. 11. My cousin goes to work at my uncle's company, and many employees don't know about it. Today, the female colleague next to my cousin was called to the office by my uncle. Uncle: "The young man sitting next to you is not lazy or not working seriously at work?" Colleague: "No, he has been very active in his work and has done very well." Uncle: "Then did he fall in love, do you know?" Colleague: "I don't know if he's very familiar with him." Uncle: "Then I will be relieved, this company will be handed over to him in the future!" "The next day the female colleague began to frantically pursue her cousin!

12. In the near future, everyone has entered the intense revision stage and are all in the preparation for the exam. The nephew of the second grade went to the supermarket after school to buy a knife to cut the pencil and asked the boss: Is there a knife for sale? The boss looked up at his nephew, then wrapped an arm around his nephew's shoulder and asked: Little classmate, what knife did you buy, what kind of sand did you buy? The nephew shook his head, then pushed the boss's arm to the side, and weakly replied: Sha Xiao. Only to see the boss slamming the table: Who are you scolding?

13. When I was chasing our class flowers in the play, I also wrote a love letter of more than 30,000 words. Unexpectedly, she was a girl who hated the poor and loved the rich, and her character was not good, not only rejected me, but also spread love letters everywhere. I was ashamed not to say that the homeroom school still troubled me every day. However, the whole school has since known me as knowledgeable and talented. Later, I not only became the editor-in-chief of the school newspaper, but also received a love letter from the school flower.