1, once took the train sleeper, the upper bunk is a young woman, looking beautiful. At night, there were only two of us in the whole train room, and the young woman seemed to be a little frightened, so she climbed down from above

1, once took the train sleeper, the upper bunk is a young woman, looking beautiful. At night, there were only two of us in the whole train room, and the young woman seemed to be a little frightened, so she climbed down from above, and then said to me, you are a good person at first glance, you should not have any thoughts about me, right? I was surprised and said, good people also like beautiful women, you look so beautiful, I have ideas about you is a very normal thing. The beautiful woman said helplessly, then do you have a wife? I shook my head and said, I haven't married yet, and she asked again, do you have a girlfriend? I shook my head and said my first love was still there. She sighed and said, this is deep in the middle of the night, there are only two of us in the whole sleeper private room, you will definitely bully me, forget it, I will still be your girlfriend directly. I have a girlfriend for no reason, and I am quite dizzy, but this is also very good, and finally ended the single state. After getting off the train, I took her to a big meal, bought her jewelry bags and clothes, and her mood was obviously better, she smiled and said, I didn't expect you to be rich. I shook my head and said, I have worked for so many years, I have only saved tens of thousands of dollars, and today I spent all of it on you. She looked at me with a complicated look and said, You are really good to me, but your money has been spent, what should we do in the future? It's impossible to drink the northwest wind, right??

2. Colleagues Xiao Li and Xiao Wang are going to get married on Labor Day, and the two discuss simply go to the chairman together to ask for leave! When we got to the chairman's office, the chairman asked: What are you two looking for me? Xiao Li and Xiao Wang said to the chairman together: Chairman! We're getting married, and we're going to take a week off! The chairman was stunned!

3. The son's academic performance is average, and he is writing homework at home very seriously after returning home from school today. I walked over to him and asked him an arithmetic question: "How much does 5 plus 16 equal? The son fiddled with his fingers and toes anxiously, and it was not enough to draw for half a day. The husband was anxious: "Don't you use your brain??" The son said, "There is only one brain, and it is not enough to add it!" ”

4. I struggled for many years and bought a small house of 300 square meters in the city center. Then I handed over the decoration to a couple who were doing decoration. When I was supervising, I found that the couple, either the man was playing with the mobile phone, or the woman was playing with the mobile phone, and the other was working. Curious, I asked them: Why is one working and one idle? The woman said to me very domineeringly: Don't look at our husband and wife to do the work, but there must be one boss!

5. A colleague brought his baby daughter to my house for dinner. My bear child handed the little girl a bottle of milk and touched her glass, pretending to be drunk. Little girl: "It's milk, it won't get drunk." My bear child said, "It was the little dimples on your face that made me drunk." "Haha, this sister's technology is stronger than his father's!"

6, with children married to a man 15 years older than himself, he is also very good to me. But the son did not have a good relationship with him, and he was always lukewarm to him. In order to please his son, the husband personally took his son to the piano shop to practice. Today, the teacher of the piano shop said to her husband: "In the future, there will be another person at home to accompany you!" My husband: "What do you mean by that?" The teacher said mercilessly: "Because you are the only person in your family who can't read the score, and you never pick a mistake!" ”

7. The sister-in-law was only one month old when she was newly married, and she came to my house with a bitter face to complain to her wife, saying that she had been wronged. The wife quickly asked her what was wrong, and the sister-in-law grabbed her wife's hand and said: Big sister, how did you make your brother-in-law fall in love with washing clothes? The wife smiled: Because your brother-in-law tasted the sweetness once he washed his clothes! The sister-in-law asked curiously: What sweetness did you taste? The wife said secretly: I deliberately put a dollar in my pocket. The sister-in-law was shocked: No, the brother-in-law is worth 50 million, will he still care about such a dollar? The wife said coldly: If your pocket money is only 10 yuan a month, can you not care about a dollar?

8. I am a distributor of SF with my girlfriend, and after work, we both return home together. When I got home I was sitting on the couch playing with my phone, and she was sitting on my lap reading a book. Suddenly, I found that my girlfriend was biting her lower lip while concentrating on reading, and the picture was very beautiful. I kissed my girlfriend gently, and she frowned and looked at me and continued to read. Then came the seductive picture, when I wanted to kiss it again. My girlfriend reached out to cover my lips and angrily scolded: "Get out of the way, old lady toothache you mixed with something!" ”?

9. The owner of the listed company is optimistic about his brother-in-law and gives him his own fat girlfriend. He wanted to reject the boss, and his colleague persuaded him to marry the boss's daughter to fight for 30 years less, and he gritted his teeth and accepted. On the night of the wedding, the sleeping brother-in-law felt the window shake a little, and he woke up! Hurriedly patted his wife awake and said, "Wake up, get up, there is an earthquake!" The wife said with a look of contempt, "Are you stupid?" Which earthquake? I turned around! ”

10. I have been working at Alibaba for more than a month and have always been bullied by the team leader. I couldn't stand it, so I went to the door of the company to smoke, saw a lottery shop, and bought one. I didn't expect to win the jackpot all at once, 10 million! I immediately called my girlfriend: hahaha I won 10 million, you followed me is indeed right! Eat SHI and go, see you simply! Long live the money! The next day my girlfriend called and said: I'm in Cambodia, when are you going?" "

11. Play Truth or Dare with friends, let me hang a marriage advertising sign on my body, which reads: Marriage, gender male, love female, mate selection criteria: can take care of people, will do housework! I went out for a walk, the effect was remarkable, the widowed neighbor Aunt Liu followed me three streets! I wondered, she obviously doesn't have a daughter?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #