Take a walk with your wife in the evening! See a couple coming across the street! Girls are so pretty! Men's super rubbing kind! I couldn't help but bow my head and sigh: Good cabbage makes the pig arch up. When the wife heard it, she slapped her face: Don't scold yourself as a pig!
2, when I was in kindergarten, my cousin's math has not been good, and other subjects are OK. At that time, I also hired a tutor and went to a cram school, but it was not good, and I couldn't find the reason! Until one time my cousin scored 59 in math, when I got home, my uncle took a look at him and did not beat him. Silently lit a cigarette, shook his head, and said: "Don't say more, next time try, there are still 3 points to pass!" At that moment, my cousin was in tears, and I think my cousin already knew the reason... (Source: Network) Comment: A little bit of thoughtfulness, a little bit of consideration for others, will make everything different.
3, after making cookies can't sleep and remember some interesting things in school ~ today to go to class, my class representative asked "teacher, is the avatar yourself" I am honest " Oh "class representative" my friend saw and has been asking me why your English teacher is so good-looking"I: Now the little fart child is so happy
4, my father-in-law is my high school class teacher, my brother was very nervous when he went to his house to see him once. The mother-in-law was cooking and was not embarrassed to help. A large table of dishes was laid out, and I picked up the national cellar 1573 and poured a large cup for my father-in-law, and I thanked my father-in-law. But my father-in-law said that he did not drink, and I held up my wine glass and was embarrassed there. At this time, the mother-in-law took the wine glass and grunted and dried it all. In this way, the brother went to the boyfriend's house once and was fed under the table by the mother-in-law.
5. Interview the landlord when renting a house for the first time. The landlord said: One thousand yuan rent per month, and if you pay a year, it is ten thousand. Please forgive me for my science and engineering mind, I immediately found the error. I asked rhetorically: Ten thousand a year, shouldn't a month be more than eight hundred? The landlord listened to it and thought that what I said was very reasonable, and was ashamed to change it to twelve thousand a year.
6, my wife and I have been married for five years, and recently gave birth to a second child. During confinement, she wanted to drink black chicken soup, and I drove to the market to buy it without saying a word. Seeing that the vendor was actually a little boy, I asked: How much is a black chicken? Boy answered: 87! I asked again: How much does it cost to buy two together? The boy was stunned for a moment, and then without reacting, he said: Our family has a limit on purchase, and each person can only buy one!
7, I don't know if you are afraid of ghosts, anyway, I will be afraid of ghosts, my wife is also. Every time I come home from work early in the evening, I hear my wife in the house shouting again: "Dead ghost, don't, go away!" "Scared me one night and didn't go home and pack a night at an Internet café. Am I too cowardly to leave my wife alone in the room to be frightened and afraid.
8, junior high school English listening test, because I and the table English is not good, the teacher gave me two a test paper, we discussed well, I choose a, he chooses d. I got eleven points and he got a punch. The teacher slammed his head with that test paper and said continuously do you have a d option to look at the test paper? Is there a d option?
9, two days ago there was a beautiful girl plus me micro, the avatar is very pure, look at the circle of friends also a lot of photos, it seems to be me. The conversation opened and found that it was very enthusiastic and proactive. If you don't dare to pick up her today, you have to prevent a hand, and if you fall in love with your wife, you will not be deceived by her, and there are shadows. At night, my wife took a bath, and she took a bath for nearly 1 hour. Bold about the beauty video, the wife's mobile phone rang, note: dead.
10, go on an outing, to the foot of a mountain. I found a rich man and his daughter-in-law standing by the car arguing. At this time, the rich man raised his hand above his head and swore to the sky: If I deceive you, I will thunder in the sky! I thought this scene was very touching, so I took out my mobile phone to take pictures, but forgot to turn off the flash. Just listening to the click, the rich man knelt down on the spot, crying and saying: Daughter-in-law, I was wrong, I should not have lied to you.
1 When I went to college, I usually got up late on weekends. Our dorm roommates would bring us breakfast back every weekend because they had to get up for a run. I remember once I went to a barbecue the night before and ended up eating a bit of a bad stomach. So the breakfast that my roommate bought at the second point didn't want to eat much. So I said to him, "I'm not feeling well, you can eat my share!!!! After hearing this, the housemate said angrily, "Why should I eat your dung?" ”
12, the wife complained to sir: "You don't know a woman's heart at all, and you are always unwilling to say what I love to hear." Sir: "Well, if you like to hear anything, just remind me." "Wife: "At least the title must be changed, don't always call 'wife', call three words, affectionate." "Guess what sir called?" Sir: "I see, old lady. ”
13, an American, a Japanese, a Chinese in the jungle adventure. As a result, they were all captured by the cannibal tribes. But the tribal chief said, "I am in a good mood today and will not eat you, but you all have to be beaten with a hundred boards, but before you get the boards you can have a wish come true." "It was the Americans who were the first to be put on the board. He said, "Before you hit the board, put a cushion on my ass." "The pad stopped, the board rained down; the previous 70 board was OK, after the 70 board the cushion was broken, and then the board saw blood... After the fight, the American old man touched his ass and left. After the Japanese saw the situation, they asked for 10 mattresses.
14, playing at Grandma's house, suddenly want to eat durian but lazy to go out to buy, so I picked up Grandma's mobile phone to learn Grandma's tone to send a text message to Mom: Girl, Mom wants to eat durian, you come back remember to bring one. After sending it, I was waiting for my mother to buy durian to come back, but after a while my own phone rang, opened the text message only to see my mother send me a text message: Girl, my mother wants to eat durian, you come back and remember to bring one
![A patient with sciatica used a tonic formula to help him get rid of his troubles Remember one day, a patient with sciatica came to me, and he came to me with a limp. He sighed[fig]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAP///wAAACwAAAAAAQABAAACAkQBADs=)