1, and the boss lady on a business trip, after returning to the boss lady pregnant, they fired me, I was immediately angry, so I found the boss. The hostess said. Do you know why you were fired, I said to me

1, and the boss lady on a business trip, after returning to the boss lady pregnant, they fired me, I was immediately angry, so I found the boss. The hostess said. Do you know why you were expelled, I said I don't know, didn't I buy milk powder for the child? The hostess said no, why do others send you a happy one next time? After saying that, he threw the beer lid on my head. Heck, how do people now know that this is power. There was no way but to look for a job. Find a factory, the security guard will not let in, there is no way but to say to the security guard: I came to find the daughter-in-law, the security guard said: Who is your daughter-in-law, say the name I am sure, just next to the list of excellent employees in the factory, I casually read a xxx. Then the security guard took the baton and began to beat me: She is my daughter-in-law, what is your relationship with my daughter-in-law. And then I was kicked out.?

2. My girlfriend is a fast cat anchor, and she brushed 200,000 gifts before agreeing to marry me. On the eve of my wedding, a married buddy came to me for a drink and a chat. Buddy said: Listen to my brother I a word of advice, just got married in the days must rush to cook, must be fried vegetable paste, and then inadvertently drop a few expensive plates, the more expensive the better, such words ....... Me: In this case, you don't need me to clean the dishes after marriage? Thank you brother for being so good for me! Dude: No, if that's the case, you'll be lame like me, crippled by your daughter-in-law, and then you won't have to work...

3, last year, I came to a factory by myself to apply, and the interviewer said that he would either go to the day shift or the night shift in the future, which was very tired. I was most disgusted by going to the night shift, so I filled in a 9,000 directly after the salary standard you asked for, so that they would definitely not call me, and after handing over the table, I went to the toilet, squatted down to brush my mobile phone, and came in and squatted next to me: Buddy look, I just went to the personnel department to get the paper. They're all looking at this, and you're looking at this two-way commodity for 8,000 when it comes.?

4. I can have achieved this kind of achievement now, thanks to the noble man in my life. I remember when I was a small clerk, riding an electric donkey to work and rear-ending a little girl's car. She was a very nice person, and she became familiar with her as soon as she came and went... She turned out to be a headhunter and asked for a copy of my resume, saying there was a suitable opportunity to help me keep an eye on recommendations. Some time ago, I also told my wife about this story, and my wife didn't say anything with a calm face. A few days later, the wife chased the tail of a Cayenne in a car, and the man was the big boss of a company. Now she is also very strong under my guidance, and people are digging her up as a general assistant.

5. Warm wood color and white match to create a warm home environment. The mottled wooden doors blow a strong retro wind. The built-in wooden storage cabinet can not only put large items of debris in the home, but also play a decorative wall effect.

6, recently rented a new two-bedroom apartment, the landlord is a forty-year-old beautiful woman, looks can be described in one word, that is, the charm still exists. She was a widow, her husband had died three years earlier, and she had heard that it was lung cancer, which was said to be due to too much smoking. After her husband left, she left her two houses, one for herself and the other for me. I became more and more acquainted with her and soon fell in love, she told me that as long as I quit cigarettes, she would marry me, I thought about it for a while, and decisively broke up with her. Women can quit, cigarettes I can't quit!?

7. The director came back from a business trip and wanted to surprise his wife. While knocking on the door, he said, "Hello, the takeaway has arrived." As a result, there was a knock on the door for half a day, a young man gently opened the door, the director was just about to get angry, looked up, the house number was wrong! The director smiled happily and was about to leave、、、、、、 when a familiar female voice came from the house: "Why is it so slow to take a takeaway?" When the director looked at it, his face turned green、、、、、、、、、、

8. The buddy stole his father's IWC watch and sold it for 120,000 yuan, and he happily invited me to eat hot pot. He led the husky, and as soon as we got to the door, the waiter stopped us. The waiter pointed at the husky and said: "Sir, I'm sorry, we can't bring our own ingredients here!" When the buddies heard this, they immediately became angry: What do you mean? It's not an ingredient, it's my pet! The waiter did not want to show weakness and said: Sir, this excuse I have heard too much, just yesterday, a person brought two cabbage, two pounds of lotus, hard to say that it is his family's potted plant, after going in, it will be hot in the pot!

9, invite the buddies to drink, he has a sad face. Me: What's wrong? Dude: My girlfriend doesn't want me anymore. Me: Why? Dude: I went to see his parents that day, I don't know how many units she lives in, I want to call her to go downstairs to pick me up, but my mobile phone is out of power, I borrowed a mobile phone from an uncle to make a call, and it showed that the name is Baby. Me: Don't want a girl like that. Dude: I beat up my uncle and later learned that he was her father...."

10, I was attracted to a white rich beauty, she did not care whether my family was rich, because she had money. So I confessed to her with great joy, and she did not agree to turn around and get into the car of a rich man in his 60s. I was heartbroken and planned to jump off the building and kill myself, but no one could persuade me. The people downstairs did not know how to be good, and suddenly an old man shouted: "Someone else's wife has been with you for five years in vain, do you still have the face here to find death?" "I immediately figured it out, immediately went downstairs, and went to eat a hot pot by the way!"

11. Last night, riding a battery car to the street to buy something, a woman suddenly rushed out and hit the front of my car. So I immediately went to help this girl, and I smiled and said to her, "Little sister, you are really lucky today!" The girl immediately got angry and said, "Your brain is in the water, right?" You bumped into me and said I was lucky? Then I calmly said, "Usually I'm a crane!" Can throw you into the sky, just today in a good mood to drive a battery car! ”

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