1, the sister-in-law is about to give birth, the contractions are crazy in pain, and the wife whispers in her ear: Sister, relax! Before I gave birth to a child, I was in terrible pain, so I scolded your brother-in-law bastard wang badger and hated your brother-in-law for being beaten by thousands

1, the sister-in-law is about to give birth, the contractions are crazy in pain, and the wife whispers in her ear: Sister, relax! Before I gave birth to a child, I was in severe pain, so I scolded your brother-in-law bastard Wang Baguo, hating your brother-in-law who was stabbed with a thousand knives, and could be much more comfortable. The sister-in-law ripped open her throat and came: Brother-in-law! You bastard, sister... husband! ... You're a knife," ah... Brother-in-law you king... Eight... egg! Fortunately, I was not there, and the sister-in-law in the ward, her husband, in-laws, nurses, and other pregnant women were stunned!?

2. Go home at night and find that the uncle of the neighbor is opening the door. Because he has been working outside the home for many years, the chances of meeting him are very small, so I saw him and greeted him warmly. He looked up at me, was stunned, and immediately said enthusiastically: Wan'er, it's you, you're not as fat as you, I don't dare to admit it. What is this, just meet to hit people, I want to lose weight!

3, Valentine's Day night, the goddess said to me shyly: You go to open a room. Of course, I can't let go of such a good thing, immediately went to the hotel to open one, and then called the goddess and asked excitedly: The room is already open, when can you come over?? The goddess said: You are so good, I will come right away. Me: Nothing, I'm willing to do anything for you!! It didn't take long for the goddess to come over, I gave her the key, watched her and her boyfriend step into the room, I left happily...

4, today is so sad, take advantage of the good weather and girlfriend to hang out, walking on a small slope of the road, I was behind my ex-girlfriend, and then the girlfriend said: "You carry me?" I said, "Good! You jump up. "My girlfriend ran and rushed over, on a whim to trick my girlfriend, and when I jumped over immediately, I immediately squatted down, and then, then my girlfriend flew over me. Then there was no more, and I thought about it behind closed doors.

5. After resigning from OPPO Electronics Factory, I went to a big company to work as a driver for the boss. Last month, I was driving onto a secluded road when a group of people stopped the car. Pulled my boss out of the car and beat him up, and before leaving, he warned him that he had offended people. Today it was still that place, and another group of people came to block in front. The boss was frightened when he saw it, and discussed with me: You and I change seats, I will give you 100,000 yuan. I gritted my teeth and agreed, but I didn't expect the gang to pull the boss out of the car again, and after a while, the sound of the boss crying wolf howled. When they were leaving, they said to me: This time you ruined your driver, the next time it will be you!

6, my wife and I are blind date, today my wife said she regretted it. I asked her angrily: What's wrong? I regret marrying, what did the blind date do? The wife said helplessly: It is the wrong understanding when I am blind date. I wondered: what was misunderstood. The wife sighed and said: At that time, I saw that you were quite rich. I smiled and said, "You'll still look good." The wife continued: Do you think, this old ugly does not have the money to dare to come on a blind date? Who knew I had met.

7, walking on the road to cross the road, across the road came a few handsome little brothers, I bowed my head to pass through them. One of the handsome guys sang a song from his mouth: Lift your hijab and let me see your face... I glanced up at him slightly, who knew that the handsome man immediately stumbled and changed a song: Sister, you boldly go forward, go forward, don't look back...

8. Just stopped the car, a Bentley female driver reversed and hit my car. I got out of the car to check it out, not too serious, and said, "Private, 500 yuan." She replied, and as a result, she flipped through the bag for a while and said, "I'm sorry big brother, more than 2,000 people in the bag have been lost to the three people in front, is it okay to have 200 left?" "I don't know what to say.

9, the sister-in-law used the router, the brother once went home to find that the router is pasted on it, wireless password: 11111111. Then the sister-in-law turned her head and asked her mother-in-law, saying: This password is so simple, it is known next door, our net will be stuck! The mother-in-law looked at it dismissively and said: You know? Exhausted they don't know! Who says that password is really a password? The sister-in-law said: Now this set of people is really deep enough.

10 The brother is the director of a company, and a female subordinate is pregnant with his child. In order not to let his wife find out, he secretly borrowed 6,000 yuan from me. Now two months after this incident, my brother asked me to go out for a drink. At the wine table, my brother said to me: Dude, the last time I borrowed your money, I can't come up with so much at once, I can only repay it in installments. Me: Yes, I'm not in a hurry to use it. Brother: Okay, I'll give you some today. Saying that, I took out two coins, and I: What does this mean? Just pay back two bucks? Brother: To tell you the truth, I can only save pocket money to pay you back now, five yuan a day, I save two pieces, I can't put it on my body, my wife found that I have to deduct it. I:......

11. Teacher: "The straight line between two points is the shortest", this axiom does not need to be proved, everyone admits, universally applicable. A classmate asked, "Can that be proven?" Teacher: "It's not impossible for you to prove it, you put a bone 10 meters away, and then let go of the dog, it must be running straight to the bone, it won't turn or take a detour." Dogs know this, what else needs to be proven? "Classmate: ... . . ."

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #