1, go out to run errands, almost two o'clock, too hungry, just found a small shop on the side of the road, to a rice bowl to eat. The habit of the troops, eating is not leftover, a large portion of rice bowl is eaten by me

1, go out to run errands, almost two o'clock, too hungry, just found a small shop on the side of the road, to a rice bowl to eat. The habit of the troops, eating is not leftover, a large portion of rice bowl was eaten clean by me, not a grain of rice left. After eating, the shopkeeper came to checkout, looked at the clean plate, I felt his face twitch, for a long time, he helplessly asked, brother, what did you eat? I can't see it! This, am I reporting a cheap one?

2, the uncle opened a shop selling roast duck in the vegetable market, but the business of the shop next door is hot, and the uncle is completely inferior to ah. I went to see it, and the shop next door was quite fine, and the roast duck was even clean with the toe slits. The cut meat looked better and was neatly arranged on the plate, so I told my uncle what their family had done. The uncle shook his head and smiled bitterly, "I have never compared ah, the human family wears three generations of special roast duck." ”

3. When I first joined the work, the company arranged for me to temper the cleaning team in the service area for a week. It wasn't a hard job, and I worked very hard and was positive. I keep the bathroom clean every day, without a trace of odor, and the wash stand is not a little watery. The aunts of the cleaning team praised each other: "This young man is good, can bear hardships, and is very capable!" "In view of my excellent performance, the head of the cleaning team actually applied for me to stay for another week on the grounds of insufficient manpower...

4, driving my husband's Mercedes Benz out to buy things. When I came back, I found that the body was covered with dust, so I scrubbed it for a while. I walked into the house and shouted: The woman who loves you the most in the world has just wiped your car clean. The husband said as he walked out the door: Mom is coming?

5, the sister-in-law wants to open a nail salon, let me help her write a plan. I was busy for a day and a night, finished writing the next day, and then went straight out to run errands. When I came home at noon, I found that the table had been cleaned up, but the pile of manuscripts had disappeared. When I smelled a smell of smoke, I asked my sister-in-law, "What are you burning?" Sister-in-law: "Do you think I'm so stupid that I'll burn unused paper?" I burned waste paper that had been written. ”

6, girlfriend recently a little financial difficulties, looking for me to borrow money. My friend had difficulties, and I had to carry it with her, so before she could urge me, I hurried to withdraw all my savings, spent a clean breath, and then accompanied her through the financial difficulties.

7, Grandma went out to play, called me in the afternoon, said to let Grandpa pick her up. I turned to Grandpa, who was playing chess, and said, "Grandpa, Grandma asked you to pick her up." I didn't think grandpa would take a chance: This wife, I know the chaos, I don't know how to take a taxi back, I have to pick it up, wait I have to talk about her. More than half an hour later, Grandma came back, keeping something in her mouth. And Grandpa, who is shrugging his head and following Grandma...

8, in the brother's private villa, the nephew broke a thermometer, the sister-in-law nervously looked for mercury in the room, the nephew asked the sister-in-law: "Why do you want to find mercury?" The sister-in-law said to her nephew: "If you don't clean it up, it will be volatilized in a moment and the whole house will be full of poisonous gas, and we will all be poisoned." The nephew listened to the frightened and hugged his sister-in-law's leg and said, "Mom, let's change the house." The sister-in-law thought for a moment: "Makes sense!" ”

9, one of the instructor's whole idea: toothpaste is a good thing, in addition to being able to clean teeth, it can also be used to restrain people, if you accidentally step on it, then more than clean shoes. Look at this floor so clean, it is estimated that it has to be cleaned, it is simply "killing two birds with one stone"

10, the shrewd and capable boss has been doing business in Guangdong, three years ago was checked out for infertility, but the boss lady recently became pregnant. The boss was ashamed and directly went through the divorce procedures with the boss lady and let her get out of the house. I looked at the lady boss who was very pitiful, so I spent 100,000 yuan to marry her. Last night we were both asleep when she suddenly started pulling the quilt, and I thought she was cold, so I pulled it by her. Then she pulled, turned, pulled again, turned again, and for a moment, and I was gone. Half of her body was also covered, and I felt very confused, so I woke her up and asked her what she was doing? She said: Dreaming, turning.

11, when we were young, we also belonged to the aggressive and stubborn lords, wrestling and wrestling without a word. At that time, the cousin was lazy, the third mother-in-law forced her to clean her own boudoir, she was very reluctant, after cleaning, looking for a mop, the mop was broken, she was too lazy to continue to find the mop, but happy to take a few of our children to her boudoir to play, let us compare who wrestled and wrestled more strongly. After several rounds of ground fighting, it is difficult to distinguish between them, but a few of us wiped the floor brightly...

12. When I was drinking with my brother in the evening, my brother told me about his experience when he came home yesterday. He said he ran into a sprinkler and he slowed down and followed. Rinsed for more than ten minutes, and basically washed the car. Just as we were about to ridicule his wit, a friend next to him said lightly: Wash a car like you, won't the chains and pedals rust?

13, when I was a child, my mother handed me over to my sister to take, my sister wanted to play table tennis with my classmates and did not want to play with me, she pulled me aside, picked up a few pieces of coal from the coal pile, and said in a serious tone, you can wash these and come and play with us... Then I washed the briquettes very carefully for an afternoon...

14, the brother spent more than 500,000 yuan to buy a second-hand Paramela. After carrying the car home, I felt that the odor inside the car was quite large. So, the brother bought two dog-shaped activated charcoal purification packs online and put them in the back windshield. On Sundays, he took his mother-in-law and his father-in-law to play in the field. The mother-in-law asked him: The car is so smelly, why don't you find something to suck? Brother: There are two dogs sucking in the car! After saying that, the brother felt that something was wrong!