The sister-in-law used to work as a waiter in a KTV, earning almost 10,000 a day, and later married an honest person, and the two lived a plain life. But last week, sister-in-law

The sister-in-law used to work as a waiter in a KTV, earning almost 10,000 a day, and later married an honest person, and the two lived a plain life. But last week, the sister-in-law's husband was in a car accident and did not rescue him, and the sister-in-law was sad.

At the funeral, I whispered to her: How much does the insurance pay?

The sister-in-law replied: At that time, I did not approve of it, and I did not let him buy it.

I asked again: Then how much property did he leave for you?

The sister-in-law cried: Two hundred and thirty million.

Two hundred million is: remembrance, reminiscence.

Thirty million: Don't take good care of the children, don't take good care of the elderly, don't remarry.

2 go to the night market, in the stall to see a 599 skirt, try it ok, bargain to 100 in one breath, the boss does not agree, it is estimated that the grinding will be 80 can be taken.

Before I could speak, the girlfriend next to me was chattering and going home, thinking that I didn't want it anymore, so I got up and left.

The shopkeeper said: You quietly say the number, there are other customers, I think it is appropriate, I will sell it to you!

I suddenly felt that it was not good to look, so I went straight outside, and the shopkeeper dragged me, seeing that this frame did not say a price and would not let me go.

It's impossible to say one casually: 40! The shopkeeper let go of his hand in an instant: pay for it!

3 I'm already 30 this year and still haven't found a partner. Today I was going on a blind date again, and my friend told me: Find more common ground and get closer. After meeting, the other party looked good, a pair of large eyes were particularly charming, she was very direct, came up and said: "In fact, I have cut my double eyelids." I thought hard about it: "What a coincidence, I have cured cockfighting eyes!" ”

4 The manager's father was terminally ill and died some time ago. Many colleagues in our department went, and I happened to have a cold at the time. Then the snot kept flowing, and the eyes were red, because the scene was serious, I could only endure it in the back, and then I couldn't hold back until the tears flowed. Today the manager after work suddenly called me to the office: the last time I went to my house, so many people only you are the true temperament, crying the most sincerely, today I have another elder gone, you will go with me, then you will let go of yourself, cry out loud! I:......

5 After graduating from university, I went to Country Garden to work as a salesman. Because I didn't have the money to rent a house, I lived in the staff dormitory at night. The shampoo I put in the bathroom was stolen many times, and I bought hair removal cream on Taobao and mixed it with half a bottle of shampoo at home and put it in the cupboard. Unexpectedly, only three days later, the cabinet was pried open again, and the shampoo was gone. Well, I'll wait for whoever is bald and I'll catch whom!

6 I have a crush on a female colleague of the company for more than a year, but this matter does not know how to be known by the female boss, the female boss said to me: Brother, if you dare not confess, then in this way, you write a love letter every day, I will help you transfer it to her, just like this, after two months of your coming and going, the female colleague is still cold to me.

I went to learn from the female boss: why did she write so many love letters, she was still not impressed by me. The landlady said shyly: Brother, in fact, I have peeked at your love letters, I think you are very literary, very in line with the image of Prince Charming in my heart, so those letters, I have been reluctant to give her, or you will be my Prince Charming, I will raise you for a lifetime. I thought about it, the landlady was right, instead of finding one you like, it is better to find someone who likes yourself. I said yes. Today, I live in the landlady's big villa, and the two of them live happily ever after.

7 When eating, the children wanted to drink juice, glass bottles, brother screwed for half a day did not open, handed to Brother Li, Brother Li also tried or did not unscrew, so I took it over to try, Brother Li said: You are even worse, or let me take one. Before I finished speaking, I opened it with ease! Looking at Brother Li's unbelievable expression, I told him that my sister had never hidden her strength, but she just didn't have the opportunity to perform!

8 Last week, I drove my Maybach girlfriend, who had only known me for a few days, to a friend's farm in the countryside. Halfway down the road and saw that the car was immediately out of gas, I found a nearby gas station to refuel. The staff of the gas station said: We do not support WeChat Alipay, if you do not have cash, there is an Industrial and Commercial Bank of China 100 meters in front. I turned to my girlfriend and said, "You're here to cheer me up first, and I'll go get the money." The girlfriend nodded and said: Okay, no problem. When I walked to the door of the bank, there was a cash truck parked at the entrance of the bank, and two security guards looked at me very seriously. And the girlfriend actually yelled in the back: come on, come on!

9 When the first rich second generation was in the company, he had been chatting with his wife's girlfriend. My wife's girlfriend suddenly said: "My husband is on a business trip, my family's light bulb is broken, the house is too dark, can you come to help me?" At this time, the rich second generation wife just called and said: "I can't come back from working overtime at night!" After work, Fu Er Dai drove the Maybach all the way to his wife's girlfriend's house and found his wife waiting with a rolling pin.

10 I looked at my Alipay balance today with 0 and the credit card has been frozen! I hung my head and said to my 50-year-old girlfriend, "Baby, I'm bankrupt now, and Maserati is going to change to BYD." My girlfriend took me in her arms and comforted me: "It's all right." I added, "The villa was also mortgaged by me to the bank, and I had to rent a house." The girlfriend said with a spoiled face: "It doesn't matter." I was so moved that I couldn't speak, and my girlfriend continued: "Don't be so stressed, failure can only prove that you are not suitable for being a boss, you obediently take your children to kindergarten at home, the small company is gone, I still have 5 large companies." ”

11 My cousin is the village flower of our village, and after graduating from graduate school, she worked as a flight attendant in an airline.

I met her boyfriend two days ago, on average terms and looking average.

I whispered to my cousin, "I don't think your boyfriend deserves you!" Do you have a crush on him? ”

My cousin smiled and said, "He works at the bank!" ”

Me: "So what, the salary is not very high!" ”

Cousin: "He counts money faster!" That hand speed, that technique, I'm excited to think about it! ” 

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