The loneliness of the only child, as well as the heavy responsibility of the future pension, let many families choose to call accordingly and move towards the two-child family. Seriously, on the question of whether to have a second child, the decision is still up to the parents themselves, and outsiders have no right to interfere.
Story Case:
When Dabao was 10 years old, the two-child policy was just relaxed, and Swallow and her husband thought about it again and again, or decided to have another one. At that time, the idea was very simple, that is, I felt that the eldest was going to junior high school and did not need more time and energy to take care of. It just so happens that the economy is relatively stable, and the birth of a second child at this time is relatively sufficient for both the economy and time.
After a series of plans, the second eldest was finally born, and later found that the idea at that time was too beautiful, and the energy could not keep up. The eldest is in the critical period of the beginning of the small ascension, and the rebellious psychology is serious; the second eldest has just been born and needs to be taken care of wholeheartedly, and all the time is on him, and he can't take care of the boss at all.
The originally happy and peaceful life suddenly began to jump. The point is that the boss does not like the arrival of the second brother as expected, and even with a sense of hostility. Later, I learned that the child felt that he was not loved, and the parents' focus was on the second eldest.
So for a long time, Swallow fell into self-blame, regretting the decision to have a second child easily. Fortunately, later, the child grew up slowly, and life was more comfortable.
Warm advice from people who came over: Having a second child is a big thing, although the decision is up to the parents, but the eldest is also a family member, and he needs to be asked for his consent.
By the way, age difference is also a particularly serious problem. Many parents dare not have a second child, that is, they are troubled by the problem of their children's age difference. Many people say that the difference of three years, or seven years old is the best, try is this really the case? Look at the children's mothers who come over, what are the valuable suggestions?
Mother Leaf, who is two years apart:
Between my family's big treasure and the second treasure, there is only one year difference, which is considered an accidental pregnancy. At that time, I also considered the question of whether to want it or not, but after thinking about it again and again, I decided to stay, after all, the child came as fate. I thought life would be particularly bad, but I didn't expect it to change much from before.
Because the age difference between the second child is small, clothes, toys and some snacks can be shared, saving a large part of the economy. And the age is similar, two children are more likely to have a common language, and although the two brothers and sisters will also fight, they will soon pass.
Four-year-old Sawazawa's mother:
After Dabao went to kindergarten, he decided to want Erbao, thinking that he could take more time to accompany and take care of the second eldest. Of course, before asking for the second treasure, he carefully consulted with the boss, especially after going to kindergarten, he was particularly envious when he saw that his classmates around him had brothers and sisters. Since the whole family unanimously agreed, the birth of the second eldest is the beginning of happiness.
The difference is four years old, the eldest is slightly sensible, and occasionally helps to take care of the second, even if it is a simple bottle, diapers, etc., it will be a lot of worry. Most importantly, the eldest can also teach the second eldest a lot of things, faster than the adults teach.
Bean Moms over six years apart:
Just six years apart, the eldest is in elementary school, and the second is just born. In terms of age alone, I think this age difference is very good, because the boss has been relatively sensible, and many things can be done independently. And he has his own friends and classmates, and has no intention of competing with his younger siblings for favors.
It's just that there is a generation gap between the eldest and the second, and many times, he will take care of the second under the reminder of the adult. However, it is rare to play with the second eldest, and the face is full of small expressions of "disgust". As a parent, of course, I understand the idea of the eldest, after all, the second is still so young, his cognition and acceptance ability is limited.
Jay Jay's mother, who is more than ten years apart:
Seriously, I can't imagine why I had plans to have a second child at that time. The eldest has gone to junior high school, the second has just been born, and the pain before has been experienced again. It is most appropriate to use "exhausted", because of the birth of the second eldest, the eldest has a strong rebellious psychology, and almost every day does not make people worry.
It can only be said that the older the child, the more ideas the child has. Parents think that "brothers and brothers and brothers" really need to pay a lot of thought. Not only can not take care of the emotions of the eldest, but also can not spare more energy to accompany the second, in the end, the two children are not well educated.
In this way, no matter how many years of age difference between the two children, there are actually pros and cons. Therefore, if you want to make the life of the second child happier, you still need your parents to prepare in advance, which is the most important.
Tips for parents:
1, the age difference is not too big, may be tired in the first two years, but let the two children grow up together, relatively better;
2, do not ignore the boss, whether the second child can be harmonious, the boss plays an exemplary role. Not only to seek his opinion in advance, but also to take more care of their emotions, so that he feels more concerned by his parents;
3, absolutely not biased, remember that "the palm of the hand is as important as the back of the hand". Although the second brother is young, when he does something wrong, he must also criticize him mercilessly and do not let his brother or sister let him.
It is said that brothers and sisters are the best wealth left by parents to their children. Then from the very beginning, let them love each other and help each other.