When children reach a certain age, they have a very obvious rebellious mentality, and they like to oppose their parents in everything. In this case, the parents are always very angry. They think their children are too stubborn to understand the good intentions of their parents. So use criticism and, in some cases, violence, in the hope that the child will change their attitude. So what can parents do to help their children?
First of all, parents should understand the reasons for their children's rebellion, whether it is due to the child's growth or due to psychological problems. Only by finding the cause can they actively help the child build positive emotions.
Why do children always want to go against their parents?
As parents, we have all experienced situations where children do what their parents ask them to do at a very young age. But when they reached the age of 11 or so, they began to rebel in a very obvious way. What are the underlying reasons why children are always working against their parents?
The first reason is the development of cognitive ability
Children's cognitive abilities develop with age, and the older they get, the more they know, the stronger their cognitive abilities are, and they gradually begin to form their own way of thinking.
At this time, children's tendency to listen to their parents will slowly change, and some extroverted children will begin to say no to their parents and gradually act according to their own ideas. If parents are critical of their children, the two sides may clash.
The second reason is that the child enters a period of rebellion
Most children enter puberty at the age of 11. During this period, they experienced intense physical and psychological changes. As a result, children begin to mature mentally and do not believe what their parents tell them.
They no longer believe that everything their parents say is correct, but have their own ideas. During the rebellious period of adolescence, children will have very strange thoughts, will feel that their parents are not doing them any good, just want to raise them, and sometimes they even feel that their parents are deliberately targeting them, so it is normal for children to fight their parents during this period.
The third reason is that parents are not educated in an inappropriate way
Most parents are very sensitive when educating their children, and many parents educate their children in a negative way that is not conducive to their normal physical and mental development. As the pressure increases, the child's psychological pressure will also follow, and when the pressure reaches a certain level, it will manifest as explosive behavior such as confrontation.
Therefore, when parents criticize their children, they should be careful not to criticize too much, and certainly not too harshly, but to try to focus on the essence.
What are the specific forms of adversarial sexual behavior?
Although it literally means that the child behaves in the exact opposite direction of the parents, and even seems to be involved in a violent confrontation, in reality it is not a complete expression, but a state of mind.
Form one, screaming and yelling
When negative emotions pile up, both parents and children erupt. The inevitable result is a verbal confrontation between parents and children. Parents criticize their children too much, raising their voices at a certain point, while children choose to resist and constantly defend themselves with words. If words do not convince the other parent, violence ensues.
Form two, psychological confrontation
Another form of psychological confrontation is when the child does not do what the parents ask for, but does not have an external confrontation with the parents, either to show respect or because he does not want to ignore the parents at all. This psychological confrontation is more frightening than the confrontation through crying, because children often do not want to express themselves, which makes many parents feel anxious.
How parents can help their children develop positive emotions
This state of negativity affects their lives and education when children regularly take action against their parents. This requires parents to take the initiative to help children get rid of negative emotions and build positive emotions.
First, be more understanding and sympathetic
Parents should always remember to think differently when criticizing and educating their children. As an adult, you are better at controlling your emotions and understanding your child's thoughts. Therefore, it is more important to understand the child's psychological state, because only with more understanding and sympathy can the child understand the parents, and they can build a bridge of communication with the child.
Second, don't blindly rebuke
All children make mistakes, sometimes with consequences, but parents should treat them rationally and not indiscriminately blame their children.
If the child is too young, the parents should understand the child's young age and understand things, explain things to him so that he will not make the same mistake again next time; if the mistake is due to the child's behavior, the parent should correct the child's behavior. Don't criticize or scold, as this will have the opposite effect.
Conclusion: At some point in a child's life, they want to argue with their parents about everything, yell at them at the first opportunity, and sometimes even fight with them. Only by understanding the reasons for this can we better help children develop positive emotions.