In recent years, the situation of home-school relations has not been optimistic, and sometimes vicious incidents have occurred. So how can parents and teachers build a harmonious relationship?
People say that a truly beautiful relationship is mutual support, and the most beautiful triangle relationship should be: parents support teachers, teachers support children!
1
Parents' attitudes affect the growth of children
Many people have been touched and influenced by a Thai short film on the Internet.
The little girl Ju usually accompanied her mother to sell vegetables in the wet market, and because the bean sprouts in the shop next door sold well, the little girl asked her mother: "Can we grow them to sell?" ”
Mom's answer was, "Let's try." ”
Due to the lack of planting experience, after the first test of water, all the bean sprouts died, but even so, my mother still said with a smile: "It's okay, let's try again." ”
So, the mother found a book to grow bean sprouts, and tried again with her daughter according to the method in the book, only to find that it still failed.
When they actively studied the problem and tried again, the little girl asked worriedly, "Will it succeed?" Mom still says, "Let's try!" ”
The sprouts finally grew, and the mother and daughter were excited. What's more, the little girl grew up with a scholarship and is currently doing research work in Sweden.
When we watch this video, we will all sigh how important it is for children to teach their parents' words and deeds.
If this mother has any impatience, or if she often feels hopeless about her life, she may not have even fulfilled her daughter's proposal to plant sprouts from the beginning.
If the mother had simply left her daughter to explore on her own, perhaps such a young child might have given up the experiment early because she could not afford to fail.
"Let's try." What an ordinary sentence, but full of magic. These four words tell the child: we must keep hope in the unknown and dare to try for it.
Everyone's attitude has been influencing growth since birth.
Each of us actually knows ourselves by knowing the world, and our parents are the people who helped us to know the world in the first place.
What we get from our parents' words is permission, and we dare to take another step forward;
What we see in the eyes of our parents is fear, and we hide behind them forever;
What we see in the behavior of our parents is dissatisfaction, and we learn not to look at the whole world.
So, the same is true for school education, if parents do not respect the teacher, will the child still respect the teacher, respect the rules of the school, and grow up together?
2
Parent Support Teacher,
It's about supporting your own children
Japanese educator Akira Takuko shared a story:
The son of a botanist took an unknown grass and asked the teacher for advice, but the teacher did not know him.
So the teacher and Yan Yue said to him, "Your father is a famous botanist, you may wish to consult him, and the teacher also wants to know the secret of the grass." ”
The next day, the child came to the teacher again: "Dad said it, and he didn't know the name of the grass." He also said, teacher, you must know, but you forgot it for a while. ”
After speaking, the child also handed over a letter written by his father to the teacher.
The teacher opened the letter, which detailed the name and characteristics of the grass, and finally attached a sentence: I hope that this question will be answered by the teacher, presumably more appropriate.
This parent's approach is very clever, he lowers his identity, supports the teacher, helps the teacher to shape the image in the child's mind, in fact, this is also to support his own child!
Zhu Yu, the principal of Shanghai, shared a similar experience.
When her daughter was in the fourth grade, she was very naughty and always ran into trouble, and as a result, at the end of the semester, there was not a single affirmation in the five-element comment given by the teacher, all criticism.
The daughter was very sad, and when she came home, she didn't eat food, and cried and asked her, "Mom, am I really bad?"
That night, Zhu Mom lost sleep, and the teacher's comments were unforgettable even for her to watch after 14 years as a class teacher.
She knew that the daughter who had been criticized had taken a blow to her confidence and had even begun to doubt herself!
But she also thought of herself as a middle school principal, who had shared on the podium countless times: "Parents must support the teacher!" School is a place for children to go every day, and it is impossible for parents to replace teachers no matter how big they are. ”
This time it comes to me, what should I do?
She wrote a letter overnight, not to her teacher, but to her daughter:
Boy, have you ever seen a sharpened knife?
Putting the knife on the whetstone and sharpening it, the knife must have hurt, but he didn't make a sound, because he knew that only after such a sharpening could he become a good knife, a fast knife.
Do you want to become such a good knife? That's going to be a grind!
After you went to bed, your mother had already talked to the teacher on the phone, and the teacher said that today's comment was a whetstone, that is, to let you accept repeated grinding.
When you correct the shortcomings in the review, you will be a sword that is unique in the world.
I wish my mother used this letter to save the teacher's image in her daughter's mind.
Later, she talked a lot with her daughter and helped her reshape her understanding of herself, and her daughter also wrote herself a lot of "comments" about Zhongyun.
Zhu Mom said that this matter is still very afraid to this day, the child will not learn anything from the teacher she does not like, if it is not handled in this way at that time, what will be the result?
She often uses this story to encourage teachers to measure their children's rulers and make them feel successful.
She will also use this story to remind parents that teachers will not deliberately criticize children, parents who encounter problems can communicate with teachers privately, but they must support the teacher in front of their children, which is the best policy!
A teacher who did the training shared this experience.
It was her first class, in a workshop in a mall, and the kids loved her.
But what she never expected was that a little girl ran away during recess.
She panicked and quickly looked around, and by the time she found the child, the child was already crying very sadly.
The child's mother saw it and quickly came over to comfort her daughter: "It's all right! Mom is here, it's all right! ”
The little girl soon stopped crying, and then the child's mother continued: "This sister was very nervous just now because she couldn't find you, she didn't mean it, now you kiss your sister and comfort her, okay?" ”
The little girl said, "Good! "Then kissed her, which she still remembers!"
That's how a kind, tolerant child is taught. The teacher is at fault, but instead of blaming, the parents choose to be tolerant and supportive! What this parent does in front of his children should be the best education!
Looking back, people say that the truly beautiful relationship is mutual support, and the most beautiful triangle relationship is not: parents support the teacher, teachers support the child? In this way, children can grow up healthier!
3
Parents should give
How supportive the teachers and children are
Treat your child:
We can re-see the world through the child's eyes, so that he himself has more curiosity to explore the view of a thing, the usefulness of a thing, and even the appearance of a flower.
● In ordinary life, carefully care for children's curiosity.
Only when the child has hope, will he have the goal of growth, and can he learn the lessons in his life experience, rather than always thinking that his future is impossible.
● When talking to your child, ask a few more questions: "Why?" "Maybe you'll get a completely different answer than you expected.
The child's world is simple, don't use our adult ideas to "empathize".
● If you can, it is recommended that you can personally accompany your child to see the world.
In this process of looking at the world, we allow the child to see it from his own eyes without rushing to say his own thoughts, and perhaps his perspective will bring you infinite surprises.
We can accompany the child far enough, the child has the strength to go further.
● Teach children to respect teachers and participate in the world of children's learning.
The relationship between teachers and parents is complementary, parents are the first step for children to understand the world, and teachers play an indispensable role in the educational process of children's learning and growth. Both parents and teachers should actively participate in the learning world with their children and grow up together.
To treat teachers, you need to understand:
● Teachers are educators, not nannies.
"I've handed it over to you, child, you should talk about it, you should scold, we've all handed it over to you." This sentence is the favorite of parents to say, but teachers often do not like to hear it. This sentence seems to be polite, but the words are more of a sense of shirking responsibility. Teachers' concern for students is not the same as "maternal love", and it is a misunderstanding of education to expect teachers to treat students as their own children.
● Trust the teacher
A friend recently shared a story about her child's new kindergarten: Home co-parenting is especially important.
Personally, I gave my son a parent-teacher conference at the new kindergarten two days ago. This kindergarten itself is a second-level second class, the main class teacher is 25 years old, in the self-introduction, she has been taking the middle class for 8 years, and it is reasonable to say that she has certain experience.
But her ability to express herself in meetings with her parents, I personally think she is relatively weak, many questions parents are anxious to ask, she herself can not answer.
At that time, some parents looked at each other, sighed, and exchanged disdainful eyes.
But my reaction at the time was trust.
First, in small classes, the kindergarten is too far away, the pick-up is too difficult, and it is hard for a year. It's hard to get close now, and I'm thankful to be able to enter the park smoothly.
Second, maybe the teacher is very good to the child, communicates with the child very smoothly, and the child can accept it.
Third, since it is sent in, after all, it is a public kindergarten, the principal and director, unified management, will not easily have problems.
Finally, until now, I have told myself that trust is the primary condition for home co-parenting and children's successful kindergarten.
● Deal with problems to be reasonable.
If the child says something that happened at school, the parents are very concerned, and when visiting the teacher to find out the situation, he can say: "I want you to know that my little friend said that something happened in your class, because I know that the child will exaggerate things, and any story is always hidden, I hope you can give me a clue." ”
If you are still unhappy with the matter, you can ask the principal about your doubts, but the most important of all things is:
Never say in front of your children that the teacher is not. If the child figures out that you don't respect the teacher, they won't either. And this will definitely make future troubles endless.
END
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