Xu Jing knows that life is like a long journey, and there are always unexpected scenery and twists and turns. When she was in kindergarten, her mother left the house, and her father Xu Minghai became her only support. At that time, Xu Minghai often said: "Jingjing, no matter what, Dad will always be by your side." Dad's simple words have become a solid support for her growth.
Growing up, Xu Jing gradually learned to be self-reliant, and she understands that a single-parent family has brought a lot of trouble to her life, but she never complains, because she knows that her father works harder than anyone else. Every time the relationship failed, Xu Jing just said to her father lightly: "It didn't work out, Dad, neither of us can do without anyone." Xu Minghai shook his head with a smile, but he couldn't help but worry about his daughter's future in his heart.
Until Xu Jing met Zhou Yan, everything seemed to have changed. Zhou Yan, like Xu Jing, has also experienced a resilience not to admit defeat in a bumpy life. The first time they met, the two chatted all night in a small shop on the street. Zhou Yan told about his difficulty, Xu Jing listened carefully, and occasionally interjected, "How pitiful you are stumbling here!" Zhou Yan smiled and counterattacked: "That's not, I was in a lot of trouble before I met you." "
The relationship between the two was full of laughter and fun, and Xu Jing found that the long-awaited sense of security and identity was satisfied by Zhou Yan. Things went quickly, and two months later, they decided to get married. Regarding this rapid relationship, Xu Jing asked Zhou Yan: "Are we a little fast?" Zhou Yan said confidently: "Jingjing, I think the right person, sooner or later you have to meet, you will catch it as soon as you meet it, and the twilight of the two of us will pass slowly." "
However, Xu Jing's father Xu Minghai was not very satisfied with this family business. He felt that Zhou Yan's family background was average, and it might be a burden to his daughter in the future. Father's advice and concern are just unnecessary worries in Xu Jing's opinion, "Dad, I think it's good to be with him, we can support each other." Xu Minghai sighed, "Daughter, I can't say anything about feelings, you have to think clearly." "
After marriage, the sweetness of the two has not diminished, and when they went to their father's house for dinner on the weekend, Xu Jing gave Zhou Yan a look every time and signaled him not to contradict him. Zhou Yan also responded to Xu's father's words with a smile, "Dad, you can rest assured in the future, I am good to Jingjing." "
However, as time went on, some real-world issues began to surface. The economic tension and the difference in life attitudes have gradually increased the friction between the two. Xu Jing sometimes wonders if she and Zhou Yan are too anxious and mistakenly use similar ups and downs as a reason to go through a lifetime. After Xu Jing and Zhou Yan got married, the heat gradually faded, and it was replaced by real problems in daily life. They have different understandings and expectations of family, and these differences slowly accumulate and finally explode at a dinner.
That night, Xu Jing complained, "Look at it, we're both busy like this, and it's such a mess in the house." Can you take the initiative? Zhou Yan defended: "I'm also tired, I have to do this and that when I go home, where can I keep up." Xu Jing, who is tolerant on weekdays, finds that this kind of life is getting farther and farther away from her ideal family.
At the same time, Xu Minghai also played a big role in their marriage. Every weekend, he always complains that Zhou Yan did not buy a house, did not save enough dowry, and his expectations for his son-in-law are higher than the sky. Once at his father's house for dinner, Xu Minghai said bluntly: "Zhou boy, when can you be more motivated?" My daughter can't suffer with you. Zhou Yan responded embarrassedly: "Dad, how can it be so easy now, we are working hard." ”
Xu Jing tried to be Zhou Yan's backing, but she also felt the rift that gradually grew between the two due to financial problems. She tried to discuss with Zhou Yan and said, "Do we have to make a plan, or find a financial advisor or something?" I don't want us to fight over money all the time. Zhou Yan shook his head helplessly: "Okay, you arrange it, I'll listen to you." ”
Xu Jing remembered the money her father gave her when she was newly married, and she secretly wanted to hide it, but later gave it to Zhou Yan as an investment. That night, she asked Zhou Yan: "How is the investment, is there a return?" Zhou Yan lowered his head guiltily: "It's a loss, it's all a loss." Xu Jing just cried silently at that time, and countless "ifs" flashed in her heart.
On the other hand, the relationship between Xu Jing and her father has also become strained because of problems in the marriage. Whenever he chatted with his father about life, Xu Minghai would always nag: "Jingjing, forget it if you get married, do you think Zhou Yan can count on him to support his family?" Xu Jing always insisted: "Dad, don't worry, he and I can handle it." ”
However, as time went on, things didn't get better. The two thought that they could change the status quo through the efforts of both parties, but found that the problem was far more complicated than they thought. After a big quarrel, Zhou Yan questioned whether Xu Jing was really willing to spend time with him, and Xu Jing responded angrily: "Difficult? All I see is that you can achieve nothing! That night, the hearts of the two people who originally loved each other were heavy in each other's hearts.
The fierce quarrel exhausted both of them, and they no longer tried to understand each other as before, and contradictions and misunderstandings were like an impenetrable net that surrounded the two people. Every time she gets together with friends, when someone brings up the topic of "is your marriage happy?", Xu Jing always shakes her head with a wry smile, feeling that her expectations for happiness are becoming more and more confused. Zhou Yan and Xu Jing's marriage is like a fragile glass that can't withstand a little wind and waves. One night during that time, the quarrel between the two escalated again, and the strength to clean up the mess seemed to be completely drained.
"What the hell do you want, Xu Jing?!" Zhou Yan couldn't hide his excitement and said, his eyes were full of doubts and puzzlement. "You say you want a home, isn't that your home? Am I not doing well enough? "
Xu Jing was already teary-eyed, choked up and replied: "A home is not like this, Zhou Yan, what I need is not just a house, what I need is a place where two people can be warm." You just have empty blood, but you can't give me the security I want. "
Words are like sharp arrows, piercing each other's soft underbelly. Zhou Yan said angrily: "Then you say, what do you want?" If you really feel like you're living such a bad life with me, then let's go for a divorce now! "
Xu Jing was stunned for a moment, and for a moment she thought that Zhou Yan would persuade her to change her mind, but she didn't. Her heart was mixed, but she still gritted her teeth and nodded: "Okay, let's do it!" "
The next day, Xu Jing's father, Xu Minghai, encountered this scene at home, and when he came to Zhou Yan and Xu Jing, his heart was also clenched. He didn't expect that his daughter would face such a cruel choice. Xu Minghai asked worriedly: "Have you two really thought it through?" "
Xu Jing's tears swirled in her eyes, but she held back stiffly: "Dad, things have come to this point, I'm tired, I don't want to quarrel in this family anymore." I need to stop, we all need to. "
Zhou Yan's lips were tightly closed, and his face looked unusually pale. Xu Minghai sighed: "You are impulsive, you are evading!" Isn't marriage all about facing difficulties together? "
But Xu Jing's determination seemed to have been made, and she replied to her father: "Dad, the difficulties in marriage can't be solved by constantly arguing like this, I think we need time to clear our minds." Perhaps, it would be better to be separated for a while. "
At that time, Xu Minghai looked at his daughter's eyes, and some things seemed to finally make him understand that the 'patriarchy' that had been overemphasized had made his daughter suffer too much. He said sadly: "Jingjing, Dad just wants you to be good, I... Maybe I'm wrong. "
In the end, Zhou Yan and Xu Jing went to the Civil Affairs Bureau in silence. Xu Minghai didn't try to redeem it again, but the moment they signed, he still couldn't control his emotions, and on the way around, he quietly wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes. The divorce certificate was in hand, but Xu Jing and Zhou Yan did not expect Xu's father's attitude to change. At the door of the Civil Affairs Bureau, Xu Minghai looked at the divorce certificate in his hand and sighed: "Jingjing, Zhou Yan, did you really decide to do this?" ”
Xu Jing lowered her head, not knowing how to answer, while Zhou Yan nodded silently. Xu Minghai continued: "If you two really want to live, you have to find a way to solve the problem, not just leave." ”
Xu Jing had mixed feelings in her heart, "Dad, I understand what you mean, but sometimes, letting go may be the best chance for each other." Xu Minghai looked at his daughter who was becoming more and more mature, and the self-blame in his heart deepened.
After returning home, Xu Jing suddenly felt a sense of relief when she looked at the face in the mirror that had been polished by the years. Later, when she got together with friends, when she mentioned marriage, Xu Jing just smiled slightly: "Love, marriage, isn't it a kind of growth?" The friends didn't ask anymore, they all thought that Xu Jing had figured it out.
Soon, Zhou Yan also came to Xu Jing, and the two slowly talked about the past in their original home, Zhou Yan was a little helpless: "Jingjing, in fact, I have always wanted to do better, but in the face of those difficulties, I really don't know what to do." ”
Xu Jing comforted him: "It's the first time we've lived like this, and we're still groping, so it's okay." Both of them smiled, as if releasing the burden in their hearts.
When they were separated, Xu's father suddenly proposed: "Can't you two really try again?" Xu Jing and Zhou Yan glanced at each other, but neither immediately answered. Xu Jing knew in her heart that no matter what the future holds, this experience has become a part of her growth.
During that time, Xu Jing often recalled the days she had experienced with Zhou Yan in the dead of night, every dispute, every laugh, became so precious. She also learned how to talk to herself and how to understand the unique experience that marriage brought to her.
In a cold wind, Xu Jing bowed slightly, "Perhaps, this is the price of growth." The friends around me can only gently echo it. And Xu Jing's words and expressions reveal that her cognition of reality and ideals is more mature and profound.
And for everyone who has experienced the twists and turns of marriage, isn't it constantly growing and knowing themselves?