In life, we often encounter this kind of person who can't speak:
"He is obviously concerned, but what he says is accusation;
He obviously approves, but what he says is sarcasm;
He could have answered well, but what he said was a rhetorical taunt. ”
A good word is warm in three winters, and a bad word hurts people in June.
A word can hurt people, and a word can also ferry people.
How many family conflicts stem from not being able to speak.
01
Talk well
It is the most precious feng shui of a family
I have a cousin who, after high school, is like a changed person:
He has a withdrawn personality, a short temper, and a bit of world-weariness.
Her parents took her to a psychiatrist, only to find out she was suffering from depression.
Why is that? The doctor said: "It has to do with the way her parents talk, and she lives almost every day in the voice of her parents. ”
A word that parents do not intend to say will really ruin the child's life.
"Why are you so useless?"
"You've lost all your faces at home."
"After all, you are still nothing compared to others."
These words are like drawing a line on a blank piece of paper, and it is not easy to erase it without leaving a trace.
Verbal violence is like an invisible knife, and the person who has been hurt understands that the stinged heart will leave a scar for the rest of his life.
The Thai short film "Bean Sprouts" has inspired many parents.
A mother and daughter do not live a wealthy life and live by selling vegetables in the vegetable market.
One day, the girl saw that the bean sprouts in the stall next door were selling well, and she asked doubtfully:
"Mom, why are bean sprouts so popular?"
Mom replied, "Because there's only one stall selling bean sprouts."
The daughter decided to plant bean sprouts.
But for poor women, it seems unlikely that they will have to spend money to grow bean sprouts.
But Mom said softly, "Let's try." ”
So they began the "experiment" of growing bean sprouts.
For the first time, the sprouts died.
Mom said, "It's okay, let's try again." ”
The second time, they brought in professionally grown books, and her daughter asked, "Will we succeed this time?" ”
Mom smiled and said, "Let's try." ”
The mother dropped out of school in the fourth grade and did not know how to grow bean sprouts, but still encouraged her daughter to explore with her daughter.
The second time, it still failed.
They continued to search the book for answers, only to find that they had not been able to water them on time.
The third time, they stuck holes in the plastic bottles they had picked up and made a watering device, and the sprouts grew well.
This mother respects the child, she does not scold the child for ignorance, but encourages the child again and again.
The little girl eventually became a scientist and did research in Sweden.
Psychologist Rosenthal said:
"Every child can become an extraordinary genius, but this possibility depends on whether parents and teachers can see, expect, and cherish these children as they treat geniuses."
Speaking well is the most precious feng shui of a family and the best starting line for a child.
02
It is the most effective tranquilizer for marriage
03
Don't hurt people
Source: Night Listening
First Instance: Zhang Jiayu
Second instance: Guo Juan
Third trial: Shi Shaogen
Final Judge: Liu Chang
Typesetting: Yang Ying